Whats Worth Sacrificing
by Kauri510
Summary: AU. Dean left Sam and John to go to college. Years later, he's now a member of the BAU. They get word that a serial killer from the FBI's most wanted has been spotted. It shocks Dean to find out the serial killer they're trying to find is... Sam. But why? It must be a mistake.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, Criminal Minds, or anything else you recognize.**

 **Warning: Language. Mild Violence. Sastiel. Past Mpreg.**

 **AN: I'm going to try and make it as much like Criminal Minds as I can. So according to Dean and Supernatural Wiki, Dean never finished high school and just got his GED, so for this story just imagine that's not true. In my opinion Dean is a lot smarter(education wise) than he's let on in the show. So keep that in mind when reading.**

* * *

Chapter One:

 _ **Fifteen Years Ago**_

"Dean, take your brother and go around back," ordered John. He cocked his gun. "Watch each other's backs. Go!"

Dean nodded and together he and Sam went around to the back door. Dean went in first in case something jumped out; at least then he would get hit and not Sam. Many brothers his age never took their duty as big brother to the same level as he did. Sam was his responsbility, and he would always put him before anyone else. Their dependecy on each other was both wonderful and unhealthy, but it's not like it was anyone else's concerrn except theirs... not even their father's.

Dean stepped in slowly, and took a quick look around. He was getting better at only taking a moment to look around for any possible danger, what they could use for weapons in case theirs were of no use, and exits in case he needed to get Sam out. As much as he enjoyed being a hunter, Sam's safety was first priority.

He was about to address Sam, when he heard movement upstairs. He looked at Sam, and was glad they were so close that they can communicate silently. Sam followed Dean upstairs and they made their way to the source of the sound.

Both brothers had their guns ready. Dean stood in front of the door he knew the noise was coming from. He was about to kick the door in when he spun around and came face to face with their dad.

"Are you boys okay?" John asked looking them up and down for any injuries.

"We're fine. I heard noise in here," Dean said motioning to the door.

"I know. I heard it too. I was scoping out the other rooms in case there were more."

Without a second longer, Dean backed up for John. Not having to use that much strength, John kicked the door in. As soon as John stepped into the room, he was thrown across to the other side; his head slamming into the wall knocking him out.

"Dad!" yelled Sam.

The witch used her magic to throw Sam back out of the room... the door slamming shut refusing to open. Dean fired off three shots, but each shot missed her by an inch. Dean could hear Sam pounding on the door, but Dean couldn't worry about him at the moment. Before Dean could fire another round, the witch threw him back against the wall holding him there. He cursed when his gun fell to the floor.

The witch walked up to him looking very smug. She looked him up and down. Even though Dean hated witches, he couldn't deny she was beautiful. Her brown hair was kept in a high pony tail. Her slim figure was covered by a sexy black dress.

 _"Dean! Dad!"_ yelled Sam from the other side of the door.

"Don't come in!" Dean ordered back. He couldn't let Sam come in and get hurt.

"You love your brother, don't you?" Dean ignored her. She put a hand out and touched his cheek. "How sad... to give up your wants and dreams for your family. Are they worth sacrificing what you want?" It was strange that the witch actually looked concerned. She turned to look at his dad lying on the ground, and then back to him.

"I don't usually do this, but because of how amazing you are to give up what you want for your family, I will."

"What-" Dean was cut off when the witch began to chant. He didn't know if what she was chanting was going to hurt him, but at least it wasn't going to be Sam. He would never be able to live with himself if Sam was hurt because of him.

When she was done speaking, for a moment he didn't feel any different, but then he felt a tingle in his chest; he felt lighter... like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders... a weight he's been carrying ever since he was four. Before he could speak, the door burst open with Sam pointing his gun at her.

"Wait!" Dean managed out, but it was no use. As soon as the word left his mouth, Sam pulled the trigger. One bullet straight through the heart.

Dean fell to the ground. He told Sam to check on their dad, and when Sam did he could only stare at the body of the witch. He came tonight to kill a witch who was using magic to harm others. He was a hunter, and he hunted evil things. After feeling what he did from her magic, he was starting to question if she was ever evil...

* * *

A few days after, Dean was laying on the bed while Sam was watching TV. He couldn't get what happened with the witch out of his head. He had never brought a case home with him, and now that he has he didn't know what to do about it. He couldn't talk to their dad seeing as how he lied to him about what happened. He couldn't speak to Sam about it even though he could talk to him about anything.

 _"How sad to give up your wants and dreams for your family. "_

Dean had never told anyone, not even Sam, about his dreams. Regardless if he loved hunting, he still dreamed about something else. He didn't want to keep being a hunter. He wanted to do something more with his life. He wanted a family of his own, and to live normal and safe. He knew that as long as he was with his family, he would never have that.

 _"Are they worth sacrificing what you want?"_

Dean scoffed. Of course they were worth it. But... would it be wrong if he sometimes had second thoughts?

Two days later, John was sitting at the table looking over a newspaper article. He had gotten word from Bobby that there was a Wendigo in the area that needed to be put down. John had dealt with a Wendigo twice before, so he knew how to handle this one. He looked at his boys and knew right away that Sam wouldn't be able to come with them.

John was proud of Sam for his improvements, but he felt that Sam wasn't ready for a Wendigo. If Sam did come along, John knew that he would be too worried about him and not focused on the hunt. Although he hated to tell Sam that he would have to stay behind, his son's well being was more important.

"Dean?" John called out. Ever since they finished with the witch almost a week ago, his son had been acting strange. He was worried about him, but he knew Dean would think he was possessed or something if he showed any concern.

"Yeah?"

"There's a Wendigo a town over. So we'll be leaving in the morning." He put the newspaper away, and he prepared himself for Sam's complaints.

"What about me?" Sam asked turning down the volume on the TV.

John sighed. "This is too dangerous for you. You're not ready."

"But Dad-"

"Do not argue."

Sam got to his feet clearly angry with his dad. "But I can do it!"

"I said no!" John hated to raise his voice at Sam, but he felt strongly that one day Sam would understand why he was always so hard on him... more hard on him than Dean. Besides it wasn't his job as a parent to worry about his son liking him. It was his job to raise his sons right, and if that meant saying no to Sam for certain cases until he felt that he was ready then so be it.

Sam huffed and went back to the TV. He hated it when his dad didn't let him come along. He was a Winchester dammit! He needed to be out there with his dad and Dean fighting monsters. Although he hated leaving all the time, he really did want to be out there helping his family. He really wanted to live normal, but deep down he just wanted to be on the same level with his brother.

Dean looked at his brother sadly. He knew it was time to talk with his dad. He stalled for a couple of days, but he knew it was time. The way his dad was treating his brother because of hunting was ridiculous. Because it was his job to take care of his brother, he knew he was in his right to say something.

"Dad?"

"Hmm?" John didn't look up from writing in his journal. It was important that he write as much as he could, because one day he won't be here and his sons are going to need this. Maybe Sam and Dean could even add to it or write their own.

"We need to talk."

"About what?"

"Don't you think this has gone on long enough?" Dean sat down across from his dad. He didn't want to do this, but he knew it had to be done.

"What are you talking about?" John asked still not looking up from his journal.

Dean sighed. "Dad, you need to stop telling Sam that monsters are real."

* * *

John froze instantly. For just a moment he thought Dean was joking, but as soon as he looked at his son's face, he no longer thought that. John pushed his journal away, and gave his son his attention. He had no idea why Dean would say that.

John furrowed his brow clearly confused, "And why would I do that?"

Dean leaned forward. "I know you enjoy all this supernatural stuff, but you need to realize that this isn't what Sam needs. I know after Mom died, you needed something to latch onto, but you can't dump your delusions onto Sam."

It had taken a few moments to realize that Dean was being serious. This wasn't a joke, and it was starting to freak him out. He never would've expected Dean to be saying this... ever. Then something Dean said caught up to him.

"Delusions?" John leaned back in his chair. "Why would you say that?"

"Dad, it's okay," Dean reached out to touch his dad's hand, "There's help out there, don't be afraid to ask for it."

John was starting to think his son was possessed, but when he looked at the salt lines in the room they were fine. He took his hand away, and he seriously wanted to laugh. This had to be some fucked up dream, right? "If I'm having delusions then you must be having them to, because not too long ago you were right there fighting those things with us!"

Dean shook his head, "I _thought_ I saw those things, but none of it was real!" Dean rose to his feet obviously angry.

Sam looked over at his father and brother and frowned. He knew that something was different about his brother, but he didn't realize it was this. He got off the bed, and went to stand next to his dad.

"Of course, it's real. We all saw the monsters. We even hunted a witch. Dean, why are you saying this? What's wrong?" Sam asked.

Dean looked at his brother, then back to his father. "You see what you're doing?! All because you couldn't grieve right, Sam killed an innocent woman."

* * *

John pushed Sam out of the way, and stood up in anger. "I listened to this long enough. I don't know what the hell is going on with you, but you need to stop."

Dean rubbed his face in frustration. Why couldn't his dad listened to him? These delusions about monsters need to stop. He could only imagine what this was going to do to his little brother in the long run.

"I can't do this anymore. I'm tired of going from town to town fighting monsters that aren't real. I barely finished high school with top grades, and it wouldn't have been as much as a problem if we didn't move around so much."

"You know damn well why we moved around. We're trying to find the demon that killed your mother!" John didn't know what the hell was going on with Dean. He never expected this from him... maybe from Sam but never Dean. Something was wrong, and if he wasn't angry from what he was hearing, then he would look into it.

Dean was pacing back and forth looking from his dad and brother. "I got my acceptance letter to the University of Maryland. And I-"

There was tension in the air as soon as the words left Dean. John's eyes widened, "Acceptance letter? When were you going to tell me you applied to college?"

Dean knew his mistake as soon he said it. When he applied, he didn't think he would get in and when he did he didn't know how to react. He didn't even know if he was going to go, but deep down he really wanted to.

"I was going to say something sooner, but it doesn't matter. If I do, I don't want to leave knowing you might not be able to take care of Sam."

Okay that was completely uncalled for. John stepped forward in anger, but refrained himself from doing anything he'll regret later. "Excuse me, but I know damn well how to take care of my son."

"Dean, you're leaving us?" Sam asked feeling lost. Dean said that they would always be together. Dean said he would never be alone. "But we haven't found the demon yet." Sam was beginning to feel tears in his eyes.

Dean sighed. He felt so much older and tired than he should. "There was no demon. It was just a terrible accident that killed Mom, and almost killed you... nothing more."

"I don't know what brought this on, and right now I don't fucking care. You want to go to college instead of helping us find the demon that killed your mother, then go! Let me tell you something, if you walk out that door... don't you ever come back!" With nothing more to say, John grabbed his keys and wallet and left.

* * *

Both Sam and Dean stared at the door not knowing what to say. Sam didn't want his brother to leave them. Yeah, sometimes he wished that they lived normal, but he was okay with being with his family. He never knew their mother, but that didn't mean he didn't want justice for her. She died to save him, and he wasn't going to let her death mean nothing.

Dean couldn't believe his dad. All he wanted to do was help him grieve properly so he wasn't dumping all his issues onto Sam. His brother was only fourteen, and he's already killed a woman. What kind of father would do that to his child? He just wanted a life of his own.

"Dean, please don't go." Sam begged. "You can't leave me here alone."

Dean closed his eyes not able to look at his brother's distraught face. "I'm sorry Sam, but I can't keep going on like this. I need a life of my own, and I can't have that if we're chasing imaginary monsters." He turned away from Sam to begin packing his things. Sam followed.

"You've been different ever since we went after that witch. Did she do something to you?"

"She wasn't a witch, Sam. She was just a woman who believed Witchcraft was real. I was just trying to help Dad. I can't keep turning a blind eye when I know that he needs help."

Sam listened carefully and he said softly, "She did do something. Look, whatever she did we can fix it."

Dean ignored him and continued to pack. He didn't have that much stuff, but a part of him didn't want to leave Sam. He loved his brother, and if he left he couldn't help them understand that none of it was ever real. A bigger part of him wanted to be selfish. He wanted to be his own person.

In the end, he couldn't keep stalling. He grabbed his bag and went to the front door. He opened it, but didn't leave. How could he when his brother was holding on to him? Dean fought every instinct in him to stay. Every child at some point leaves their family to be on thier own, and now it was his turn.

"Dean," Sam cried out not wanting to let his brother go, "please don't leave. You promised me we would always be together. You can't break that promise!" Sam began hitting his brother, and then harder when Dean just stood there taking every blow. "You promised you wouldn't leave me. I can't go on without my big brother. You promised me."

Sam fell to his knees crying but still not letting go of Dean's arm. He loved his Dad, but he loved Dean more. Dean was more of a father to him, and he was always told that family stuck together... that they were stronger together.

A single tear fell down Dean's face. He always hated it when his brother cried, and it was even worse when he was the reason for his brother's tears. Dean dropped his bag, and got to his knees. He pulled his brother into an embrace and his kissed the top of his head.

"I know I promised we would always be together, but one day you'll understand why I have to break that promise. Just because I'm leaving, it doesn't change anything. I'm always going to be your big brother, and I always going to be there when you need me."

Sam didn't respond right away. He needed to get himself under control. It took a few moments then he whispered, "I need you now."

"You could always come with me. I got a full scholarship and it might be hard, but I can take care of you." As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew that they were true. He didn't know how he would do it, but he would take care of his brother. Now that he was eighteen, he could even try to get custody of his brother.

Sam gasped. He looked up at his brother in disbelief. "You would do that, just so we can be together?"

Dean smiled through his tears and nodded, "Yes."

Sam couldn't believe it. Although he didn't know what was going on with Dean, he would do anything to be with him. He always wanted to be like Dean, and now he was given the chance to go with him. When he thought about it, could he really do it? He wanted to be with Dean, but he wanted to get the demon that killed his mother. It was bad enough that their dad was losing one son, how would he react when he lost both? If he did leave, what about all the people that would need the help of a hunter? In the end, he already knew his choice.

"I can't leave," Sam mumbled.

Dean shut his eyes tight fighting hard against the tears. He was praying that he wouldn't hear those words. It was just as bad as being rejected by a date. He wanted his brother to come with him, but he couldn't force him.

"I can't leave Dad alone to go after the demon. He's going to need help with it."

Dean didn't know what to say or if there was anything _to_ say. Sam wanted to stay, and it broke his heart that Sam was going to continue to be in the environment of his dad's delusions. Dean pulled away from Sam and stood up. He ignored Sam's protests.

"Dean-"

"Goodbye Sam."

It was the worse day of Sam's life watching his brother walk out the door to his new life. It was hard watching Dean walk out on his family. It was hard to watch his hero walk out on him. He didn't know how long he sat there crying, but he remembered his dad coming back with dinner, and a few comforting words.

"Don't worry, Sam. We'll see him again one day."

* * *

 _ **Now**_

Dean Smith satat his desk going through his paperwork. This was the most boring part of his job. He loved his job, but he would rather be out on the field. It took years to get where he was, and he didn't regret anything. He tried not to think about his life before college, it did him no good.

"Dean, Hotch is calling for us," Derek Morgan said. Dean nodded, collected his things and made his way with his team.

Dean sat at the table with his team waiting for their unit chief Aaron Hotchner. He admired the man for is dedication to his job, and often spoke to him when he had issues with his job that he couldn't work out on his own.

When everyone was settled in, Hotch advised their Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia to begin. "Okay, the police in Souix City got footage of a known murderer, and they need our help. They have gotten word that he has struck again. The police have stated that the footage shows him shooting two men and a woman in the heart."

"Do we have the footage?" asked Dean.

Garcia nodded. "Yes, they did send it over." She clicked the remote at the screen, and they all turned their attention to what was being shown.

The footage showed a man clearly arguing with the victims, and after a short time he pointed his gun and shot them. He then walked up to the camera wanting his face to be shown. What Dean didn't understand was that from the angle of the camera, there was no way you could see his face. If he didn't look at the camera, chances are he would've gotten away with it.

For some reason, the man looked familiar to Dean, but that wasn't possible. How could he know a very dangerous murderer? He didn't listen to his team get debriefed. Hotch dismissed them, but Dean stayed behind. He walked up to the screen, and replayed the video. He paused it when the man stared at the camera. Dean paused it, and stared at the man. He gasped when it struck him who he was staring at. His eyes glistened with unshed tears.

"Sam, what have you done?"

* * *

 **AN: I hope you all liked it. Tell me what you all think. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Was anyone confused in the last chapter? Yes? Good, that's what I was aiming for. Just a heads up, I'm not very good at writing about crimes, so bear with me.**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

Dean looked over the police report on the crime scene the local police had sent over. Shock doesn't even cover what Dean was feeling. The Sam that he knew better than anyone would never do something like this. Even when he shot the woman that he and John believed to be a witch, Dean didn't believe Sam would do this. He was depressed and ashamed to say that he didn't know his brother anymore.

Finding out who they were after, Dean didn't know if he could do this, but he knew that he had to. Even though he changed his last name, he was still Sam's big brother, and although he would have to arrest him, he couldn't just ignore this. If anything... Dean was the one that was going to arrest Sam. He owed it to his brother to be the one. Dean frowned. He couldn't help feeling that this was his fault. If he didn't leave Sam alone with John, maybe he wouldn't be looking through Sam's record... maybe there wouldn't _be_ a record.

"Okay, tell us what you got on Winchester Baby Girl," said Morgan. When Dean had joined the BAU, he was somewhat stunned at the way Garcia and Morgan spoke to each other, but after awhile Dean just went with it. He would never say it out loud, but he thought the whole thing was rather cute.

Dean looked at the computer screen and listened as Garcia told them about his brother... no Sam Winchester. If he was going to be able to keep a clear head during this whole thing he needed to detach himself. If he kept doing this his emotions were going to cloud his logic, and he didn't even want to think about what would become of it. No, it would be in his best interests and Sam's if he went about this like normal.

"Samuel Winchester was born to Mary and John Winchester. He has an older brother Dean Winchester. After his mother died when he was six months old, it was reported by friends and neighbors that he flew off the rails."

Hotch looked up from reading the reports, "What do you mean?"

"Well, it seemed that John had believed that Mary was killed by a 'demon.' A neighbor had said that John had begun to buy weapons to find the killer. He believed that there were monsters that he needed to kill. He took Sam and Dean everywhere making them hunt as well. No one has seen him since.

"According to an eyewitness, fifteen years ago," Dean's heart skipped a beat, "she said she saw three people enter a woman's house. Two were teenage boys, and one was a grown man. She heard gunshots, and by the time police came they were gone."

"So," Dean spoke up. He needed to appear as if he didn't just hear that someone saw them on his last 'case.' "It seems that John couldn't grieve properly, so he made up a monster in order to deal with it. He dragged his sons everywhere and made them believe it as well."

Rossi spoke up while everyone was wrapping their minds over what they've been told. "Where's the brother now? If he was in on it with them, wouldn't he be identified along with Sam?"

Dean's heart was beating rapidly. He really didn't want to be brought up, but he knew that he would; he was just hoping that he wouldn't.

"Dean Winchester graduated from Paradise High School in 1997. He was excepted at the University of Maryland, but that's it. According to the university, there's no record of a 'Dean Winchester.'"

"Come on Mama, you have to have something," Morgan called out. Dean was sweating bullets at this point. He didn't want Garcia to find him. He paid a lot of money for Dean Winchester to have no connection to Dean Smith.

"There's a file, but I can't get into it." There it was. The file that he paid a lot of money so no one could ever get into, not even a skilled hacker like Garcia. "It's protected like crazy. I can get into it," Dean's heart skipped a beat, "but it would take time."

If she got into that file, Dean was seriously going to be pissed and in a lot of trouble. He can already picture the lecture he's going to get from Hotch. He couldn't afford Garcia getting into it. He knew without a doubt that she would, but maybe she wouldn't need to if they found Sam fast enough.

When Dean had changed his name, he was hoping to never have to see or be Dean Winchester again. He was praying and praying that Dean Winchester was gone for good. The sad truth is... no one can run away from their past forever. Sooner or later, you're going to have to face it. How you go about doing that is the question. And that was something Dean wasn't sure he was ready for.

* * *

"Garcia, has Winchester been charged with anything else?" asked Dean. He would be lying if he said he didn't want to know for personal reasons. He hasn't seen Sam in fifteen years, and now he needed to know what he could about him.

"Uh yes. He's been charged with credit card fraud, grave desecrations, breaking and entering, armed robbery, kidnapping, and _many_ counts of murder."

Dean gasped. Now he knew this wasn't like Sam at all. Can fifteen years, and delusions change a person so much? The Sam he knew was so hell-bent on having normal. He wanted a life outside of 'hunting.' Why would Sam do this? Dean felt heartbroken. In a way, Dean was really hoping that Sam would've gotten away and became the lawyer be wanted to be.

He left his brother alone with a dangerously unstable man... does he even have the right to feel this way? To feel so concerned?

* * *

While the rest of his team talked amongst themselves about Sam, Dean watched the footage of Sam. He just couldn't believe that the fourteen year old boy that he last saw grew up to become this... this murderer. He should've stayed with them. Maybe he should've fought for custody, or reported John. He shouldn't have left him alone with John. Now...

Dean was broken out of his thoughts when he noticed something in the background. He paused the video at the very beginning, and played it screen by screen. He looked closely and paused it. He was confused at what he saw. It was a man with dark hair wearing a long trench coat. He was just watching them, and now that he was noticing the man, he looked at Sam and noticed for just a moment that Sam turned to look at him.

He didn't know what to make of it. He didn't recognize the man at all, so Sam had to have met him after he had left. At the end of the video, Sam walked off screen towards the spot the man in the trench coat was standing. If he wasn't looking for it or looking closely, Dean could swear the man looked right at the camera.

"Hotch," his team leader looked away from Garcia to him. "I think Winchester has an accomplice." That got everyone's attention. He showed them the footage, and pointed out the man.

"That's strange. Sam's personality and the way he works doesn't scream out partners. Okay, so if he is indeed working with someone then this will get more complicated. Not only are we facing a partner, but we don't even know who he is."

Dean looked back at the man. Who the hell was he? Was he the one that turned his brother into a killer? Why was Sam working with him? What was the point? If John was the one that convinced Sam that there were monsters in the world, then why would he be with someone else and not John? If he remembered correctly John had always told him the importance of family. Speaking of... where was John?

* * *

A few hours later, the BAU found themselves in the Souix City police station. They were setting up their findings. At the top of the board was a picture of Sam. Dean felt a little uncomfortable seeing his brother's picture up there. No one in law inforcement ever wants to see someone they know up on that board. Even though he hasn't seen Sam in fifteen years, he was no different.

He was the one who carried him out of a burning building. He was the one who changed his diapers. He was the one who taught him how to walk and talk. He was the one dressed him everyday for school. He was the one who walked him to class until Sam was sure he could do it on his own. He was the one who Sam went to crying when he had a nightmare. He was the who raised Sam. He was the one who was more of a father to him than their own. So, no he wasn't any different. Dean didn't want his brother's picture up there, especially at the top. Dean frowned.

"Okay, so clearly John had convinced Sam that monsters were real, so now he thinks that he has to rid the world of them," Morgan stated.

They went on about John's delusions latching onto Sam. Dean couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't right. Yeah, he believes that John was delusional and it's affects on his brother, but this whole situation just doesn't seem like Sam. Other than the fact that Sam killed people and was charged with many things, something was off.

If Dean put aside the fact that Sam was his brother, and just focused on his crimes Dean couldn't deny that they seemed too professional. Even the first reported crimes, Sam still came across as professional. He did learn from John who was a Marine, so why in the world were there reports at all? Sam and John believed that they were hunters fighting the supernatural, and John had told them they would have to be careful of the police.

What he remembered all those years ago, they were taught to never let the police catch wind of them; it was practically inbedded into their brains. So, why were their hundreds of reports on Sam's crimes? If he believed what John did, Sam would never allow that to happen. He knew that 'hunters' would slip up once or twice doing what they did, but there shouldn't be that much.

"How long has Sam been on the FBI's most wanted?" He didn't know where that came from, but it did.

They all looked at him confused. Seeing their faces, he figured his question was random. "About ten years," Reid stated. "He was first spotted when he was nineteen, and-" Dean waved his hand cutting him off. He wasn't being rude, but they all knew that if you didn't stop him, Reid would go on and on for hours on end.

"I got it." But he didn't. If Sam's been wanted for ten years, why hasn't he heard about him? If anything he has a habit of always checking the list. He swore that he's never once seen his brother's name on it. He would never miss something like that, so how did he miss it?

* * *

Sam Winchester sat on the bed watching the news for anything on their latest hunt. He hated the fact that it had come to this, but he really needed it to be done. He needed help, and unfortunately he needed it now. Even though Castiel's help was more than enough, his wasn't the type of help he needed.

"Sam, are you sure this is what we need to be doing?" asked Castiel. He sat in front of his husband blocking the TV. He had his serious face on, so Sam knew he had pay attention. He turned off the TV. "I know we need to see Dean, but I don't want to put Deanna in danger."

Sam was kind of hurt that Castiel would even think that he would do anything to intentionally put their daughter in danger. He knew that Castiel didn't say it like that, but it still hurt. "I'm not trying to put her in danger, but you know as well as I do that we need to do this. I need him."

Castiel has been with Sam long enough to know that normally people would feel jealous that they were not enough for their significant other, but Castiel was well aware that it wasn't like that for them. He knew that Sam was very much in love with him. He understood his relationship with Dean was important, and that Sam needed that. So, Castiel had no problem letting Dean join them.

Castiel sighed. "I know, I didn't mean it like that." He turned to look at their daughter playing with her toys on the bed. "I just don't want anything to happen to either of you." Castiel bowed his head and whispered, "I can't lose you."

Sam scooted closer to Castiel, and lifted his chin with his finger. He closed the distance between them and kissed him with love. He missed his brother every day since he walked out the door all those years ago. Since meeting Castiel, he found true love. It healed the pain that was caused by Dean's departure. Even though Castiel gave him love that many people could only wish for, there was still a part of him that was missing.

Sam pulled away, and looked in Castiel's eyes. "You will never lose me. I'm not going anywhere." Dean was everything to him, but he knew that if he was going to do this, he needed to make sure that nothing bad would happen to his daughter. Although he wanted his brother, his daughter came first, and he trusted Castiel to protect them both.

Deanna began to cry for their attention, Castiel stood up and walked around the bed to her. Sam just watched his husband laugh and play with their daughter, and he couldn't be happier that he has someone who loves and wants him. This was his family and it was perfect, but it wasn't complete. Their family was missing one person, and if Sam had anything to do about it that was going to change... and it was going to change very soon.

"Sam," Castiel said quietly breaking through Sam's thoughts. "Stop thinking so much about it. Hopefully by the end of this, we'll all be together." Castiel laid Deanna down for her nap. He walked back over to Sam. He cupped his face and said with love in his eyes and voice, "I promise that we'll get Dean to join us no matter what. I'll do whatever I have to to make you happy."

Sam loved this side of his husband. In the public and during their hunts, Castiel was a cruel and harsh man. He will do whatever he had to to get the job done. He wouldn't hesitate to kill a monster if it meant protecting Sam and Deanna. In private, though, Castiel was a gentle and caring man. He was still protective of him, and he made sure that as long as it didn't put either him nor Deanna in danger, he'll give Sam anything he wanted. It may take time, but whatever he wanted Castiel gave it to him.

Sam smiled lovingly, "What would I do without you?" For many years after Dean left, something snapped inside him. He banished all thoughts of normal out, and focused on the job. Whatever monster John told him they needed to kill, Sam didn't disobey. He never questioned anything his dad said. Once he met Castiel, he felt like something good could come of his life, _and_ looking at what was in front of him... it did.

Castiel leaned down and hovered over Sam's lips. "I'll never let you find out." Castiel kissed him and guided him to lay with him. Sam loved the feeling of being wrapped in his arms. He felt safe, wanted, and loved. He didn't want to be anywhere else than with his daughter and husband. Sam carefully pulled Deanna closer to him, and kissed her gently. The only reason he was here now and not on the road was he wanted his brother to be apart of his family, he just hoped that they would all be okay in the end.

Feeling what he was, things just _had_ to be okay.

* * *

Dean stood next to the crime scene, and examined the bodies. The kills were simple. A bullet straight through the heart. There were no other wounds. He knew this by the footage, but he was still surprised at what he was seeing. When his team was describing Sam's other crimes, he thought he would make it more gruesome.

Dean had figured that with Sam beheading men and women, and one time a child, torture, Sam might do more to them. He was stumped that they were just straightforward kills. He stood in the very same spot that Sam stood and imitated the kill. He needed to get in the mind of Sam.

Morgan noticed what he was doing and walked up to him. "What are you thinking?"

Dean didn't answer right away, but instead imitated the kill two more times. He looked back at the location of the camera. "This doesn't make any sense."

Morgan took off his sunglasses. "What?"

Dean pointed to the camera across the lot. "Why would Sam go up to the camera when at this angle, he couldn't be seen?"

"Maybe he wanted to be seen?" That's what Hotch had said when he mentioned it to him, but it still didn't make sense. "Sam may have wanted to be caught. From his other kills, he may have wanted the attention."

Dean couldn't agree with that. He knew fifteen years could change a person, but Sam was never the type to seek out attention. He always wanted to blend in... be apart of the crowd. Sam may have done terrible things, but some things from childhood are ingraved into your being.

A half hour later, they were done with the crime scene and started to make their way back. They needed to go over their findings. Dean has helped with many profiles, but this wasn't like the others. For one, he knew Sam and two...he knew Sam _very well._

Ever since he was first saw the tape of Sam killing those people, something had been nagging at him. He needed to know something, and the one person he knew that could help him and keep her mouth shut... He made his way to a corner and listened with one ear as Reid gave his opinions on Sam and his unknown accomplice. It took a few rings, "Dean, what can I do for you?"

"Garcia, I need your help and silence about something." Dean knew he was playing with fire by even asking for her silence, but right now he couldn't care. He needed to know, and he needed to know now.

There was a moment of silence on Garcia's end, "Is it something bad? Are you in danger? Is someone in trouble?"

This was something he loved about her; she always seemed to love mother henning him a lot more than the others. At first it was strange and uncomfortable, but after some time he enjoyed it. It made him feel happy that someone was concerned about his well being.

He chuckled. "No, everything's fine. I just need to know something concerning the case." He hesitated for a moment. He didn't know if he was ready to hear what she had to say. The last time that he had seen John, he was so sure that monsters and the supernatural were real. He had seen the effects of that on Sam, but he had to ask. He took a deep shaky breath, "I need to know what happened to John?"

* * *

Castiel stood nearby watching the FBI go over the scene of their crime. He wanted to inform Sam that his brother really did come. Castiel was a little hesitant on allowing Sam to show his face on camera, but he couldn't say no to Sam wanting to see his brother. He was okay with allowing Sam to be seen by witnesses in the past only because of the reasons behind it, but this was different.

Castiel couldn't deny that he was overprotective with Sam, but he couldn't help it nor did he want to. He loved Sam with all that he is, and he would gladly kill for him. In fact, he has. During their hunts, he kept one eye on their target and one eye on him. When he first came to Sam, he knew right away that he was the one that was going to protect him.

When he first proposed to Sam three years ago, he swore that he would do what he had to to make Sam happy. He understood that Sam wanted his brother back, and after a little convincing he caved. He approved of bringing Dean to their side, but they were going to do it his way. Regardless if Sam wanted Dean back, his and Deanna's safety came first.

He watched as Dean tried to figure out Sam's kill, and it amused him that Dean was using logical means to come up with an answer. If only he would use what he had forgotten, he may have already come up with why.

Castiel turned his back on them and made his way back to Sam. He was happy that Sam would finally get his brother back, he was just sorry that it had taken so long. The only problem they would have was to wait. Right now it was Dean's move. After that they would make theirs.

* * *

Dean sat with his team not listening to anything they were saying. He was still wrapping his mind around what Garcia had told him. According to her, John had died of a heart attack three and half years ago. The hospital records showed that John and Sam had checked in after they were in a car accident. Apparently, they were hit by semi truck. Neither of them were hurt too badly, but the next day John had died. None of the doctors could explain how.

"Dean?" He looked up to JJ calling to him. He looked around and notice the others were gone. Damn, he needed to start paying attention. "Were you even listening?" She looked very amused, and a little concerned.

He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. "I'm sorry. I just got a lot on my mind. What were you guys saying?"

JJ chuckled. This wasn't the first time Dean got lost in his own head, so it came to no surprise to her or the others. She filled him in on what they said. Apparently, they all wondered why Sam would be spotted by anyone at all. With his skills at evading police, they didn't quite understand how he could get seen.

Dean took a moment to think about that. "Well all killers slip up at some point. Sam may think he's too invincible to be caught so he's not worried about being seen." Even saying that, Dean didn't believe that. "Maybe he _wants_ to be seen," Dean mumbled to himself.

"That's what we were thinking. Sam might be wanting the attention. He might be craving the spotlight, and this is his way to get it."

No matter how many times he's told that, Sam wouldn't do that. "That's not what I meant. What if he's not trying to get the attention to be in the spotlight... what if he's trying to get the attention of someone?"

* * *

 **AN: Does anyone believe that Sam is really a killer? If Dean finally saw the truth that monsters and the supernatural are not real? Hmm. Anyway, I hope you liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: I know it's only been one chapter so far, but how are you guys liking the relationship between Castiel and Sam? There are way too many Destiel fics out there, and the ones that are Sastiel are too short. So I'm really hoping that you guys are liking their relationship.**

 **Anyway, I don't really ask for reviews that much, but thank you. I really enjoy hearing what you guys have to say whether it's good or bad. Anything could help me with my writing.**

* * *

Castiel came back with dinner. He checked the salt lines and relaxed seeing they were still intact. They needed to go over their plan regardless if they knew every detail. It was his job to keep Sam and Deanna safe, so he needed to make sure Sam knew what he needed to do. Their first order of business was Deanna's safety. They had to make sure that nothing they did could risk her safety. The last thing they needed was the FBI knowing about her.

Sam was putting Deanna to sleep when Castiel came back. He was a little hesitant on breastfeeding when Deanna was born, but now he loves it. He feels closer to her. Deanna was the best thing to ever happen to him next to Castiel. When he first found out he was pregnant he freaked out, but Castiel reassured him that Deanna was a gift from God.

Finding out he was pregnant was terrifing, because with the way he was raised he didn't know if he could take care of the baby. Even though John had raised him to be a hunter, he knew that his child would be raised as one as well. When he was younger Sam never thought he would be a father, but he knew as well as anyone that he would never have a normal life knowing what he did. Sam would rather prepare his child for the real world than hide it. Was he wrong for wanting his child to know the truth?

"Sam?" Castiel said taking out his food. "If we're going to do this, you know we're going to need to call him soon."

Sam sighed. He didn't really want to call him. Not because he didn't like him, but because Sam didn't think he could handle a small child. Yeah he watched him when he was younger, but this was different. Deanna was a girl, and he didn't know the first thing about taking care of a little girl.

"Sam." Castiel said snapping him out of his thoughts. "She's going to be fine. He'll take care of her while we're gone."

"I know he will, but I still worry. She's never been away from the both of us," Sam whispered. He looked down at his baby girl; he didn't want to be away from her.

"Baby, it won't be forever. Hey." Sam looked at him with glistening eyes. "We'll see her again, there's no doubt about that. I wouldn't have us doing this if I didn't believe that."

Sam wiped his tears away. He believed Castiel, but he was still a parent so he had the right to be worried. "I just want Dean to be with us. I don't want to have to give up our daughter so I can have my brother back." He looked away from him.

"We're not giving her up. Look at me," ordered Castiel. Sam turned back to him. "I told you when we got married that I will do everything in my power to make sure you're happy. Do you really think I would allow us to go through all this if it meant that we would never see Deanna again?" When Sam didn't respond, Castiel asked again with a little more force.

Sam shook his head. "No, I'm sorry. Even with all of our preparations, something could still go wrong." Sam scooted over inviting Castiel to sit next him.

Castiel was angry with his brother in law. If Dean hadn't left, then Sam wouldn't be so hurt and upset. They would all be together. Castiel sighed heavily. But then again if he didn't, things could be very different. Castiel didn't want that if it meant not being with Sam and not having Deanna. They were his life, his reason for breathing.

When he first met Sam all those years ago, he wanted to be the one to make him happy. He knew that Sam had been through so much, and he was a little surprised that Sam was still fighting. He lost a mother he never knew, a brother who was his best friend, and a father who only tried to do what was best for his sons. Then things went downhill from there, so when Castiel showed up it didn't take long for him to rebel against his family for Sam.

Looking down at the man breastfeeding their baby, Castiel couldn't help but think that that was the third best choice of his life. First asking Sam to marry him, and the second was Deanna.

Sam was still looking down at Deanna and whispered softly, "You'll always be with me, right Cas?"

This was the part of Sam that always broke Castiel's heart. Sam always had low self esteem. Losing John and Mary had a strong impact on Sam, but it was always Dean's leaving that did the most damage. John and Mary didn't choose to leave him, but Dean did. Now Sam has a fear that everyone who says they love him will leave.

Castiel wrapped an arm around him and kissed his head. "Til the world stops spinning."

* * *

Dean was stumped. His team was busy going over Sam's case, but Dean couldn't bring himself to do anything to help. Even though he left Sam, he would be lying if he said he completely forgot about him. When he was in college, Dean thought about calling Sam and maybe go back to him, but school always seemed to distract him. Next thing he knew he was in the police force.

Hotch called Dean over away from the rest of the team. He had been keeping an eye on Dean for awhile when the other agent thought no one was looking. He didn't like what he's been seeing. He needed his whole team to focus to bring in Sam and his partner. Dean was a great agent even though he hadn't been with the team as long as the others.

"Dean, you've been distracted since we came here. Is there anything you need to tell me?" Hotch asked crossing his arms.

Dean shook his head. "No, Hotch. I'm sorry I've been out of it. It won't happen again."

Hotch narrowed his eyes like he didn't believe him and he didn't, but he wasn't one to force someone to talk if they weren't ready. "Make sure it doesn't. I need you all to be focusing." Dean nodded. "But if there's anything you need to get off your chest, we're all here."

Dean was about to respond when Rossi came over with very upsetting news. Sam and his partner had struck again. Dean felt so disappointed. He felt like screaming at Sam. What was the point of all this? Despite what his team may think, Dean believed that Sam was trying to get someone's attention, and he had a feeling he knew who it was, but wasn't ready to say it. He could only take so much guilt at one time.

Dean watched the news report. Apparently, another body was shot twice was located a few blocks from the police station. He frowned. That's completely out of character for Sam. What was the goal for killing someone so close to the very same people that was looking for them? Did Sam want to get caught? It's possible a killer might want to be caught, because they're unable to stop killing. Could that be what Sam wants? Is he unable to stop so much that he needs the police to do it?

* * *

Castiel was a little uneasy about meeting him so close to the police station, but they had to. Dean wasn't making his move, so he found that they had to encourage them a little. Castiel didn't like that they had to go so far to get Dean's attention. He just hoped that after this was all said and done that they could go back to how they used to be. He didn't want this changing Sam, but even if it did Castiel couldn't stop loving him.

"What time is it?" asked Sam rocking Deanna. She had fallen asleep a little while ago, but Sam didn't stop rocking her.

Castiel huffed. "It's only been two minutes since the last time I answered you." He loved Sam and was completely devoted to him, but even they could annoy the other. Every couple annoyed the other so much, and they were no different.

"Excuse me. It's cold out here, and I don't need her freezing to death because he's late," Sam snapped.

They both saw a car pull up to them, and Castiel found himself saved from becoming angry with Sam. He hated it, but sometimes Sam needed to know who was in charge. He wasn't abusive in any way to Sam, but he still needed to put his foot down now and then. In public they were equals, but in private they both knew Castiel was the alpha. It made sex that much hotter.

Sam and Castiel watched as he turned off the car and stepped out. "About time you showed up, Bobby. Deanna was about to freeze to death," Sam yelled out.

"Don't you yell at me, boy. I had to come out here in the middle of the night when I didn't have to. And you didn't have to bring her out until I got here, besides it's not even cold out here," Bobby waved off his concerns.

Castiel crossed his arms glaring at the older man with cold eyes. "Watch who you're speaking to Bobby," Castiel warned. "I don't need to remind you of the last time, do I?" He respected the man, but sometimes Bobby got too brave with the way he spoke to Sam.

Bobby rolled his eyes. "Well give her here," Bobby held out his hands. He loved Sam like he was his own, and so naturally he saw Deanna as his own granddaughter.

Sam stepped back instantly. He trusted Bobby to take care of her while they were gone, but that didn't mean he was just going to hand her over when he was told to. Bobby knew better than to rush him while Castiel was watching his every move. Sam kissed Deanna's forehead, and very carefully as not to wake her, he handed her to him.

"Do you have it?" asked Sam once he was back to Castiel's side. Bobby pointed to the car behind him.

Castiel went to the car, and when he opened it he saw a figure sitting there. He examined her and guided her out. She was gagged so she couldn't scream and bound at her wrists. He pulled her back to their car while Sam put the carseat in the back.

They watched as Bobby drove off with their daughter. Castiel was really hoping that they would indeed see her again. He promised Sam they would, and he wasn't going to break it. He never once broke a promise, and he wasn't going to start now. Sam and Castiel stared her down. They were confident that Bobby got them what they asked for, and if they wanted their plan to go the way they needed it to she had to be what they wanted.

"My partner here is going to ask you a question," Castiel said lowly. They were in a dark alley, but they couldn't risk anyone hearing them before they did what they had to. He pulled out his gun and pointed it to her head, "If you scream, I pull the trigger. Understand?" She nodded her head quickly.

He pulled out the gag, and when she didn't scream Sam asked, "Do you remember when you were bitten last month?"

She looked back and forth between them. She furrowed her brows in confusion. "Bitten by what? I don't know what you're talking about." Tears began falling down her face.

Sam looked at Castiel unsure. He knew Bobby was among the best at what they do, but sometimes their target was good at convincing you just have to take a step back. Castiel could feel Sam's questioning gaze and could feel the same, but he wasn't going to show it. Castiel tripped the girl so quickly that she fell on her back. Castiel covered her mouth as soon as he saw she was about to scream.

"Right now isn't the best time to lie to us," Castiel sneered. He cocked the gun and pointed it directly at her head. A small part of him hated that he was scaring a young girl who didn't ask for this, but a bigger part of him that wanted to make Sam happy didn't care.

Sam squatted next to him, and pushed away her hair covering her neck. It showed a bite that anyone would think came from a dog. They weren't anyone. "How did this happen?" He tapped the bite. "Tell us and we'll let you go."

She didn't believe him, but nevertheless, "I don't remember. Please believe me." Sam exchanged a serious look with Castiel, and after a short moment Castiel nodded. Sam helped her to her feet. Castiel turned his back on them obviously upset.

Sam undid the rope around her wrists, and gave her a little shove. "Go, but don't scream." She looked down the alley, and back to them.

Castiel turned back to see her still there. He stepped forward glaring at her, "I believe he said go; don't make him repeat himself." She still didn't move completely in disbelief. "I don't like it when he has to repeat himself." With that he turned his back on her, and they both started to their car.

Seeing that they weren't going to do anything to her, she turned and ran down the alley. "Help! Someone help me!"

Sam sighed. "Did she really just do that?" He was really hoping that tonight would go smoothly.

Castiel chuckled. "You're the one that wanted her to run." He took his gun out and aimed it at the girl's back. Sam followed suit. They fired and she went down no longer moving. "Did you really think she wouldn't scream?"

"Of course not," Sam scoffed. "It would look strange if we killed her right here without anyone knowing. How else is Dean going to know that it was us if no one hears anything? I was just hoping that the sound of our guns would be enough."

Castiel laughed and they both got in the car. He pulled out of the alley, and just as they rounded the corner, they saw a crowd surrounding the girl's body. "Sam?" When he recieved a hmm in response he smirked, "Don't think I forgot you talking back to me earlier."

Sam laughed lightly, "Wouldn't dream of it." He was looking forward to sleeping when they got a room but now... he wasn't so tired.

* * *

Dean looked over the crime scene. He examined her body and the way she was laid out, he concluded that (even without the witness' statement) that she ran down the alley. She was running from someone... she was running from Sam and his partner? He was feeling really defeated that the boy that he practically raised was doing these horrible acts. He could no longer deny that he was trying to get his attention. But why? What did Sam want?

Dean told his team that he suspected that the victim came from down the alley, so Hotch instructed Morgan and Dean to check it out. As they walked down the alley looking for anything that could be of help, Dean stopped.

"What's wrong?" Morgan asked turning back.

Dean just realized his mistake. His mistake was looking at Sam like any other criminal, but Sam wasn't. His team knew so much about criminals and how to get into their head, but Sam was different from the others. Sam was killing these people because of what he believed and saw, and once upon a time so did Dean. It didn't matter that Dean hasn't seem his brother in years, his team didn't know Sam like Dean did.

He turned around and looked down the alley. Why this girl? If Sam believed that there were monsters in the world and that it was his job to take them down, why this one? Take away the fact that Sam believed in monsters, these murders would look incredibly random. Put the monsters back in...

"Sam and his partner believe that she was a monster." He took out his phone and called Hotch. Before Hotch could speak, "Does the victim have any marks on her body?"

He waited a moment, _"Yeah, she has a bite mark on her neck. It looks to be a dog."_

But was it? Dean shook his head. Of course it was a dog. His brother thought the girl was a werewolf by some mark on her neck. Somewhere in the back of his head said, _What if it was? What is she was a were-_ No, the girl was just human. There were no such thing as monsters.

"Dean." He hung up on Hotch and turned his attention to Morgan. "Look," Dean looked up to where Morgan was pointing. "It seems Big Brother is on our side." It was a camera, and it was pointing directly at the alley.

It was about two hours later, when Dean and his team were sitting down examining the tape from the alley. Dean didn't know if he was ready, but he had to get Sam. Sam needed help, and regardless if Dean was a cop, he was going to get him that help.

A car pulled up down the alley to where Dean and Morgan had stopped. From the angle, they couldn't tell what type. Sam and his partner got out. Sam went to the backseat and carried a bundle in his arms. Dean sighed heavily. The way Sam was holding it, he was really hoping that wasn't what he thought it was.

It was Reid that spoke up his concerns. "Is that a baby?" The others confirmed it. "The way Sam goes about his crimes doesn't suggest that he's into babies."

"Doesn't matter at this point," Hotch stated. "Sam and his accomplice have kidnapped a child. Not only do we need to apprehend them, but now we have to bring her in."

Dean didn't think Sam was capable of kidnapping. Why would Sam need a baby? He really hoped that Sam wouldn't hurt it. He was so confused when Sam kissed the baby and gave it to some older man. Dean narrowed his eyes at the third man. He looked familiar, but Dean couldn't place him. Why would Sam kiss the baby? He was getting incredibly frustrated. None of what he's been seeing made any sense! The video went on to show Sam and his partner letting the girl go, and then shooting her. He had to turn his back on the video. There was only so much of this he could take at once.

* * *

The team went over more details they got from the morgue and the witnesses. After getting everything they could, they were ready. It was time to deliver the profile. Dean put on his FBI face, and helped his team talk to the police. They mentioned Sam's skills in many different types of weaponry. He's very skilled at evasion, and won't hesitate to fight his way out.

Dean had mentioned his delusions about monsters and that he has a hero complex. Sam believes that he's ridding the world of supernatural monsters. Because of what happened to his mother when he was a child, he feels responsible. Dean told the police that if they see Sam and his partner not to kill them. Since they don't know who the third man was, they are the only ones that know the whereabouts of the kidnapped child.

As they wrapped up what they needed, one of the local police officers came running in. She looked fairly young. Dean figured that she hadn't been in the uniform for very long. She said in a soft voice, "We got an anonymous tip. Someone had spotted Sam with a man in a brown trenchcoat going into a motel room."

The BAU exchanged looks with each other. They sprung into action. As Dean was getting into the car, he couldn't help but think this was too easy. After ten years, what were the odds that someone would spot them going into a motel room? Sam's been evading the police for a decade, were they really going to catch him?

It didn't take long for them to find the motel that Sam was currently staying in. He got out with his gun ready. He froze in his spot when he recognized the car that was parked in front of a room. Was it the same Impala? Regardless if he left Sam and John because of what they believed, he still had so many good memories in that car. He had hoped that John would give that car to him one day. He knew he had no right, but he felt a little betrayed that John gave it to Sam instead.

They stood in front of the room. They didn't hear anything inside, but they did see movement. Dean's heart was beating rapidly. This was it. He was about to see his brother in person, and he felt a little depressed that after fifteen years, Dean was going to see Sam at the end of many guns.

"Sam Winchester! We know you're in there. Come out slowly with your hands up." Morgan had a really deep voice that scared many people and the pissed off look to go with it. There was no response.

Hotch gave Morgan the signal to go in. He tried the handle and it opened. Was Dean really ready for this? Just inside the room was a man who had committed horrible crimes. A man who believed in the supernatural. A man who possibly kidnapped a baby. A man who he hasn't seen in fifteen years. A man who was his little brother. Could he bring himself to arrest his own brother? Whatever happened after they all left this motel, Dean knew nothing was ever going to be the same again. The question was... was that a bad thing?

* * *

 **AN: Did you guys see that coming? I hoped you all liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Just so you all know, this is the first time I have ever written an interrogation, so I don't know the proper way to go about it, but I tried. I hope you all like it anyway.** **Enjoy!**

* * *

"Sam Winchester," Morgan identified. Sam didn't speak. If anything Sam was looking straight at Dean. No emotion anywhere written on his face. Seeing that look on his brother's face made him feel incredibly uneasy. "You're under arrest."

Before Morgan can finish with Sam, Dean jumped right in. He ignored the look he got from Morgan because of it. "Sam Winchester you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say-" As Dean read Sam his rights he handcuffed him while Morgan did the same with Sam's companion.

Sam was taller than him, and Dean had to fight back the smile. He never thought his little brother would be taller. He may be a cop, but he was still this man's older brother. Knowing that Dean felt very sad that he missed so much of his brother's life. Even if it was something small as Sam's height, Dean wanted to be there to see it. Missing so much was his own fault, but it didn't change how he felt. Walking Sam to the SUV, Dean felt like a parent who couldn't raise their child.

They separated both men. Dean didn't know if he was relieved or disappointed that he was told to ride in with the other man. Hotch drove the car with JJ in the passenger seat. That left Reid and Dean in the back with the man in the trench coat. No one spoke a word to anyone, and the silence was very uncomfortable. Dean couldn't help but wonder what was happening in the other car.

Dean looked down to examine the man sitting next to him. He narrowed his eyes at the man's left hand. It was a wedding band. He was married? Dean was stunned. If he was married, Dean could only imagine the wife. Did this man have a family? If he did, why was he running around with Sam committing horrible crimes?

His heart broke all that much more when they pulled up in front of the police station. He was very professional when Dean was working, so he was able to hide his shock when many police officers had their guns trained on the SUVs. He shouldn't be surprised though when both men were very dangerous. The station wasn't going to take any chance letting them get away.

Dean helped the man out, and when they got to the front the man looked around. Dean followed his gaze and it landed on Sam being guided by Morgan. Shouldn't Dean feel some sense of justice? Sam has committed many crimes including murder, so why doesn't this make Dean feel better that he just helped bring in two murderers? Why doesn't Dean feel anything except betrayal? Why does Dean who has dedicated his life to stopping bad people feel like he betrayed Sam?

* * *

Dean nudged the man into the station, and not once did he look away from Sam. Morgan was practically dragging Sam in behind them with the speed he was going. Even with Sam's long legs, he couldn't keep up. It led to Sam tripping and almost falling. Dean had to stop when the man stopped dead in his tracks.

"Do that again," the man said in a very threatening tone, "and I promise these guns won't be enough to stop me from killing you."

Dean had to admit that this man was very brave saying that in a police station. Sam didn't respond at all. If Dean looked away a second later if he would've missed the small smile on Sam's face at what his partner had just said.

They booked Sam and Castiel. Sam went first and all the charges against him were listed. It took awhile to go through them all. With all these charges against Sam there was no way he was going to get parole. The sense of betrayal never left Dean, and thinking of Sam not getting parole only intensified it. He tried to shake that feeling away. This was his job, and he needed to do it. In the back of his mind, _Your job is to look out for Sam._

When it came time to book Sam's partner things became difficult. The only charges they can put against was the recent shooting and association. None of the witnesses in the past ten years have ever identified this man. When putting him in, Dean learned the man's name was Castiel. It had taken a few minutes of arguing because Castiel wouldn't give up a last name. One look at Dean, Castiel smirked.

"Castiel... Winchester." Dean didn't like this at all, because when he said 'Winchester,' Castiel looked right at Dean.

They took their mug shots, and were taken to different rooms once they were searched. Castiel had made a huge scene when it came to confiscating his wedding ring. They decided to let him have it, because it wasn't that big of a deal.

* * *

Dean and his team gathered up, and could see Sam on the other side of the glass. He was just sitting there looking straight ahead. He knew it wasn't possible, but it looked as if Sam was looking right at him. Sam still has yet to show any emotion. Seeing Sam on video was so much different than seeing him in person. He tried to push it away, but after fifteen years, Dean really wanted to embrace Sam so bad.

"Dean," Hotch said breaking through his thoughts. "Go with JJ and talk to Castiel. We all know that they have been partners for awhile, but we can't charge him with anything other than associating with Sam and the recent murder. Try and get any other confessions from him."

"Why me?" asked JJ.

Hotch turned around and saw Castiel staring daggers at them all. "Let's see if a female presence can throw him off."

"What about the baby?" she questioned.

Hotch shook his head. "Not yet. I'm going to have Garcia check if any children have been reported missing in the area."

Dean walked into the room with a folder containing pictures of the recent murder. He scattered them out showing Castiel. Not once did he look down. In fact Castiel was staring straight at him.

"Do you recognize her?" Dean asked sitting next to JJ across from Castiel.

"I don't see why you would leave," Castiel stated in an even tone. "I understand why you did, but I don't understand why you would _want_ to."

Dean's heart skipped up a beat. He could feel JJ's eyes on him. "Answer the question," he ordered.

"Was it easy leaving?" Castiel tilt his head narrowing his eyes. "Did you at all second guess your choice as you were walking away?"

No, it wasn't easy. It may have been something he wanted, but it was the hardest choice he ever made. Looking back at his life, walking out on Sam was still the hardest choice he's ever made. Whether or not this man and Sam were partners, why would Sam tell him? If he told Castiel he left, what else did he tell him?

Since Dean wasn't saying anything, JJ picked up. "Why did you kill her?"

Castiel turned his attention to the woman, "Hasn't your mother ever taught you manners? You both come in here and ask about some girl, and neither of you identify who you are. That's not very professional of you."

JJ played it cool. She has been doing this job for years, and she wasn't going to be intimidated by a killer. "I'm Special Agent Jennifer Jareau, and this Special Agent Dean Smith."

Castiel smirked at Dean. "Interesting." Turning back to JJ then down to the photos, "Well, JJ," Castiel didn't miss the exchange between the two agents. "I killed her because she was a werewolf."

"What makes you think that?" asked Dean. He didn't like this man at all. Dean didn't like not being in control, and he certainly didn't like that he knew what JJ prefered to be called.

Castiel picked up the picture and examined the photo. "I do my research. I wasn't going to kill her if I wasn't completely sure that she was a werewolf. Despite what you people may think, I don't kill innocent people and neither does Sam." Seeing Dean about to speak, Castiel continued, "Now your friend Morgan, I may make an exception."

"She was an innocent girl," Dean snapped.

Castiel shook his head. "She stopped being innocent the first time she hurt someone. If she was able to control herself, then we would've left her alone. But she didn't and sadly the only cure for a werewolf is at the end of a gun with a silver bullet."

"What else have you done with Sam?" she asked.

"What else? You mean what other laws have we broken together?" He leaned back in his chair. "We'd be here all day, and I'm not in the mood to go through them all." As Dean was about to shut the door behind him, Castiel called him back. He turned. "Was it easy?"

Dean wasn't going to answer him. He didn't like Castiel, but something in him made him answer. He looked away and whispered, "No."

He didn't look back to see if Castiel heard him, he just closed the door. Why did he want to know? What good will it do to know? Sam and Castiel were still going to go to prison just as soon as they find the child that they kidnapped. The longer that this case went on, the more Dean was second guessing himself. Dean spent the last fifteen years missing his brother, so does it matter if Sam believed in something that wasn't real? Family was the number one thing in his life, so if that was true... then why was Dean still here?

* * *

Hotch walked into the room followed by Emily. He laid out the pictures from the crime scene of the murder that brought them there. He even laid out a photo of Sam staring at the camera.

"I'm Special Agent Aaron Hotchner, and this is Special Agent Emily Prentiss. We're going to ask you a few questions." Without waiting for a reply, Hotch sat down with Emily. "Can you tell me why you killed these people?"

Sam looked down at the photos in front of him. He felt their eyes on him and even those on the other side of the window. He hated being analyzed, but this was the BAU after all. Dean was completely worth all this. He put the photos down, but didn't say anything. There was only one man he was here to speak to and he wasn't in here.

Emily tapped the photo of Sam looking at the camera. "Why did you look at the camera?" No response. "Did you want us to catch you?"

Reid had told the others that he suspected that Sam was the submissive of the pair. They may have an easier chance to them to talk if they get Sam to understand.

"How long have you been with Castiel?" she asked. "Because now that you're here, Castiel can't force you anymore." She knew she caught his attention when his head snapped up. "We can help you. We can put in a good word for you if you just cooperate."

Was she really suggesting what he thought she was? He wanted to burst out laughing. Castiel would never hurt him, and there was no way he was forced. He decided against that though. He was here for one person, and he was only going to speak to that person. Until he came in Sam wasn't going to waste his time.

"Were you hunting?" asked Hotch. He noticed Sam stiffened at that. "We got word that you hunt monsters. Is that what she was? Or did Castiel _tell_ you she was?"

Sam wanted to roll his eyes. Were they really going to try and get him to go against his husband? Were they really that stupid? Still he kept his mouth shut.

"We have plenty of evidence to place you at every scene. If you don't cooperate you will go to prison for the rest of your life," Hotch said raising his voice. Sam didn't say anything. Hotch saw that he wasn't getting anywhere with him. They both left.

* * *

Back together, they all talked amongst themselves about what they were learning. "What did you guys get from Castiel?" asked Hotch.

JJ saw that Dean wasn't in the mood to answer, so she did. "He's very cold about what they did. He said that the girl was a werewolf, and that he had to kill her. What I don't understand is that he said, 'I' not 'we.'" At their blanks faces, she explained. "He said, 'I killed her,' but we clearly saw that they both killed her."

"So," Reid spoke up, "they don't know about the camera." JJ shook her head.

While the rest of his team spoke up about Castiel's behavior, Dean stared at his brother. They had come in towards the end of Hotch and Emily speaking to him, but Sam never said a word. If Sam was doing all this because he wanted his attention, then he understood why Sam wasn't speaking. Sam wasn't going to speak to anyone but him.

"What about Sam?" Dean asked interrupting their talk of Castiel. "Reid, what did you get from Sam?"

Reid stood behind to examine Sam's behavior. It wasn't that hard to figure out why Sam wasn't speaking. "We all concluded that Sam has been trying to get the attention of someone. What we don't know is who and why. It's like he's not going to speak to anyone unless it's to his partner or whoever that someone is."

Morgan took out his phone. Dean figured that he was going to call Garcia. It took one ring for her to answer.

 _"What can I do for you my love?"_ Dean rolled his eyes.

Morgan only smiled, "Baby Girl you got anything on the baby that Sam Winchester and his partner kidnapped?"

 _"No. There's no missing reports of babies in the area."_

"What about that file on Sam's brother?" Dean held his breath praying that she said no. He wasn't ready for to have hacked into it yet.

 _"Not yet."_ Dean breathed a sigh of relief. _"It's seriously well protected. Whoever did this really didn't want anyone to have access. It's going to take a little more time, but I'll get into it."_ Dean groaned inwardly. That was the last thing he needed at the moment.

* * *

Sam stared at the glass that he knew his brother was behind. He had been in this room for several hours. He and Castiel had back up plans in case this didn't go the way they needed it to, but a part of him didn't want to have to leave here without Dean. The longer that he'd be here, the longer he'd be away from Deanna. As much as he wanted Dean, he wanted his daughter just as much. He missed her. Sam couldn't wait any longer. He didn't even know if Dean was going to come in here at all.

He cleared his throat and in a clear voice, "I'll talk, but only if Dean is in here. I'll tell you anything you want to know if it's Dean that I'm speaking to." Then he waited. It didn't take long for the door to open. First came in the black guy that tripped him and then his brother.

Morgan sat down with Dean standing behind him. Sam never looked away from Dean. He looked him up and down and liked what he saw. Dean looked good. He wasn't the same eighteen year old that walked out so many years ago. Compared to what Dean was and how he looked, Sam loved that he looked healthy. Sam felt some hope at the look in Dean's eyes. All he saw was confusion, disappointment and loss.

"Why did you kill those people?" Morgan asked.

Sam broke his gaze from Dean and stared at the man in front of him. He shrugged. "Different reasons."

"Why did you kill the girl in the alley?" asked Dean stepping forward. Sam looked him dead in the eye. He saw curiosity and concern. "Why her? She had a family and friends. Why would you kill her?"

Sam already knew a long time ago when he first started all of this that Dean never spoke of him. If that's true then his team didn't know the relationship between him and Dean. If Dean wasn't going to tell his team, then Sam would respect his brother enough not to out his secret.

"I killed her, because she was a werewolf. Unfortunately it doesn't matter if she has friends or family or even a child, she needed to be killed. There was no way she could live as what she was. She already hurt others it was only a matter of time before she did the same to her friends and family. If it wasn't us that did it, then another hunter would've done it."

Dean sighed heavily. Sam was such a smart man, and he was still doing this. Part of Dean really hoped that Sam was able to see the truth. He didn't know which was better: Sam killing because he believed they were monsters, or Sam killing because he wanted to. Was one better than the other?

Sam looked him in the eye and no one could deny, not even Dean, the seriousness and honesty in them. "Despite what you people may think, I don't kill innocent people and neither does Castiel."

Dean could see that Morgan was getting angry. It didn't take long for Morgan to go off. Morgan rose to his feet and slammed his hands on the table. He grabbed the photo of the recent murder, and shoved it in Sam's face.

"This was an innocent person!" He slammed it back on the table. "All of these people were innocent. There is no such thing as monsters! You're just a murderer who tries to justify your actions with make believe notions."

Regardless if Castiel was the 'man' of their relationship, Sam wasn't one to sit there and allow someone to yell at him. He got to his feet.

"Sit down," Morgan yelled. Sam ignored him. The only orders he follows is those that belong to Castiel.

"Don't let your badge blind you to the fact that you do not raise your voice at me," Sam spat at him. "All of these people died because they were all monsters that were hurting innocent people. Whether they were vampires, demons, shapeshifters, or werewolves. They all needed to be put down."

Morgan was about to open his mouth to yell at him, but Sam didn't allow him to have the chance. Dean just stood there watching them. He was intrigued at the type of man that Sam had become.

"What about you? Killing monsters is a part of your job." Sam looked between them. "The only difference between my job and yours is the fact that yours are human monsters."

"Sit down Sam," ordered Dean.

Sam found himself sitting instantly. He rolled his eyes. Old habits... nothing more. He heard a tap on the window, and both Dean and Morgan made their way out. Before Dean closed the door, Sam called him back. Dean turned back to his brother, and saw a genuine smile. "You look good Dean."

* * *

Dean watched his brother through the window. He ignored the suspicious stares from the rest of his team. This was the second time he's been called back by the suspect. Dean knew for a fact that he wasn't going to be able to keep his relationship with Sam to himself forever. Sooner or later either Garcia is going to tell Hotch when she gets into that file, or Dean would have no choice but to tell them himself. Sooner or later, Dean Smith is going to have a confrontation with Dean Winchester. He just didn't know who was going to come out on top.

"That explains why Castiel's name is Winchester," Emily said. Dean whipped his head to her.

"What?"

Emily rolled her eyes. "They're married."

Dean's jaw dropped. Sam and Castiel were married? Castiel was his brother in law? He saw the wedding band on Castiel, but assumed he was with someone else... a woman. He didn't know Sam was gay. The brother in him was happy that Sam found someone. He was thrilled that his little brother was a married man, but the cop in him was shocked. He didn't know why but he was.

"How did you guys find that out?"

"Other than Castiel's overprotective nature with him, their wedding bands, and their behavior, Garcia found their marriage certificate. A pastor Jim Murphy was the one who did it."

Dean hadn't heard that name in years. He was a 'hunter' who was friends with John. Dean was lost in thought when Hotch came back in the room. He was speaking to the others, while Dean was examing Castiel. This was the man that was married to his brother. This was the man that was supposed to protect Sam, but instead he's breaking the law with him. What kind of man would do that?

"Garcia can't find anything on any missing children that fit the desciption of the one that they kidnapped. Rossi and JJ go to Castiel, and Dean and Morgan go to Sam. We need to know where that baby is. Hopefully the baby is still alive and we can bring it back to their parents."

Castiel watched as the blonde and an older man came in. He figured that Sam was growing impatient and asked for Dean. That was okay. It was the whole point of allowing themselves to be caught. Sam needed to know if it was a good idea to bring Dean back. He knew that Sam wanted nothing more than for Dean to be with them, but Sam wasn't going to bring him back if Dean was truely happy where he was. It was one of a long list of reasons why Castiel loved him.

Rossi laid a single photo down in front of him. This wasn't one that he recognized. Castiel furrowed his brows and picked it up. He hid his surprise rather well. It was a photo of him and Sam waiting for Bobby in the alley. His heart skipped a beat. They weren't the only ones in the photo; Sam was holding Deanna. This wasn't supposed to happen. Why didn't he know about the camera? He thought back to that night, and didn't even think that there was a camera. He messed up, and now they knew about her.

Castiel didn't give them the chance to speak. Without looking away from the photo, Castiel said in a low but threatening tone, "When we first started dating, Sam used to call me his angel." He chuckled. "When it comes to protecting her and Sam, believe me when I say," he looked up at them and he could see the slight fear in their eyes, "I'm no angel."

* * *

Dean walked in after Morgan. He laid out a single photo, and watched Sam's reaction as he picked it up. Dean didn't notice a change in his posture, but he did see something in is eyes. It was fear and shock, but why? He thought back to the video and remembered seeing Sam kiss the child. Obviously Sam cared about the child, but according to their profile, Sam is incapable of caring for others not even Castiel.

Sam looked at the photo and his heart beat rapidly in his chest. This was all their fault. They should've scoped out the alley before going there. They should've known there was a camera there before allowing Deanna to be there. Because of their mistake, the police knew about her. He put the photo down carefully, and fought back the tears that stung his eyes. They didn't count on the FBI to know about her.

Morgan tapped the photo, "Where's that child? We know you kidnapped it, so tell us where that baby is!"

Sam scoffed and looked away. If they thought that he would tell them where she was they had another thing coming. Sam wasn't ever going to tell them where his daughter was. What kind of parents would do that? He loved Dean, but he wasn't going to tell them even if he asked.

Dean looked at Sam's behavior, and knew right away that something was wrong. Were they missing something? Was there more to this than they know? Why did Dean feel that this was all a mistake? Dean hated being in the dark, and he hated seeing the expression on Sam's face even more.

Sam looked at Morgan, and Dean saw Sam's posture change. No more did it display fear and shock. Now it was displaying rage and something Dean couldn't put his finger on. Sam stood up slowly and leaned over the table, "You have seen many people do torturous things to the innocent, but you go anywhere near my daughter and I promise you that what they did isn't anything compared to what I can do and believe me," Sam leaned in closer, "I know a thing or two about torture."

* * *

 **AN: Where have you heard that from? What does that mean? I hope you liked it! Until next time. -Kauri510**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Okay, so a lot of you guys have been messaging me saying that you're confused about whether or not the supernatural is real. So all I have to say is thank you and don't worry that is my intention. I kind of want you guys to be unsure about it.**

 **I wasn't going to do much about Sam and Castiel's past, but even I want to know. So when I'm talking about their past it will be from their perspective. It will be what they believe happened. That's not saying that the supernatural isn't real, but I'm not saying it is either. You'll just have to wait to find out.**

* * *

Sam sat in the interrogation for a while longer. The only time he's been let out is to go the restroom. He was surprised they were kind enough to give him something to eat. When he asked whether or not Castiel was given anything and was ignored, he refused to eat. He wasn't going to sit here and eat if he didn't know if Castiel was eating as well.

The BAU had come in and out several times asking where Deanna was, and Sam gave the same answer. He knew that the only reason they were still here and not on their way to prison was because they needed to know where she was. They even went so far as to say that Castiel had told them where she was so he might as well give in. He actually laughed in their faces at that one.

They learned soon enough that Sam really wasn't going to talk unless it was to Dean or he was in the room. Sam didn't care either way, but he wanted to see his brother's reactions to what he had to say. He needed to know if he and Castiel would have to go all the way with their plan, or to forget about it completely. So far they've had no reason to walk away.

Sam was leaning back in his chair feeling a little shaken from having no food, but he wasn't going to give in. They were getting upset with him especially Dean, but all they had to do was tell him whether or not Castiel was eating as well. The door opened and in came Dean and the blonde. Again they were carrying food. Sam rolled his eyes.

Dean placed the food in front of Sam, "Eat."

As much as he was hungry, Sam made no move toward the food. "Is Cas eating?"

Dean didn't answer. In truth, Castiel was refusing to eat as well. He thought they weren't feeding Sam just like Sam thought about Castiel. None of them were eating unless they knew for a fact that the other was too. Dean had suggested that they allow them to know at least that much, but Hotch refused. With Dean not answering, Sam pushed the food away leaning his head back closing his eyes. Dean had forgotten how stuborn his brother was.

Dean sat down in front of Sam with JJ. They were told that they needed to know who their daughter's mother was and who was her bioligical father. Or whether she was adopted.

"Sam?" He recieved a hmm in response. "Who is your daughter's mother?"

Sam opened his eyes slowly. He looked at them both and tilt his head in thought. How was he supposed to answer that? He wasn't ashamed to be Deanna's 'mother,' in fact he kind of secretly loved it. He didn't really see the problem with answering them. Sam figured that they all thought he was a murdering kidnapper who has delusions and hallucinations about supernatural monsters. What's this compared to that?

"Well, I guess in a way I am."

Dean and JJ exchanged a few looks. "We're asking who gave birth to her?" clarified JJ. "Did you adopt her? Or are one of you her biological father?"

Sam smiled thinking of the night she was born. "I gave birth to her. Castiel is her biological father, so no she wasn't adopted."

JJ was getting frustrated with him. Okay, if he thought he gave birth to a child, then fine. "Were you born a woman?"

Sam shook his head. "Nope. All man."

Dean knew that Sam's answers were getting to JJ, and he didn't really want him to get to her. She didn't normally get angry with those they interrogated, but she did have quite a temper. "So, then how do you suppose you gave birth to your daughter?" asked Dean.

Sam shrugged his shoulders. "I suppose I gave birth to her, because I carried her for nine months. She came from me. She was a gift from God as a reward for what me and Castiel did."

Dean was almost afraid to ask, but he found himself wanting to know more for his own curiosity rather than for the police. "What did you two do?"

* * *

Castiel watched as Morgan and Emily came in. He was getting very hungry. They wanted him to eat, so why couldn't they just prove that Sam was eating as well? It's not like they were going to break out if they showed him... at least not until he got the word from Sam.

"Castiel, did you two adopt your daughter?" asked Morgan sitting with Emily. He leaned in closer.

Castiel shook his head. He figured that this was the only reason they weren't locked up right now. He figured that he owed his thanks to Deanna even though he really didn't want her to be a part of this. "No."

"Which one of you is her biological father?"

Castiel tilt his head thinking over his answer. He and Sam have talked about this when she was born, so he gave the answer that he discussed with Sam. "I am."

Emily wrote that down. "Who is her mother?"

"Do you want the technical answer or society's answer?"

Emily humored him. "Both."

Castiel shrugged his shoulders figuring they would be curious enough to want to know both. "Well, society's answer is she doesn't have a mother. The technical answer is Sam. He was the one who gave birth to her, so by definition he's her mother." Before they could ask what he knew they would, "And no Sam wasn't born a woman." He chuckled. "I should know."

* * *

Sam watched as Dean and the blonde left the room. He refused to answer their question. If it was just Dean and no one else, then yes he would've told him. His answer was for no one else but Dean. He laid his head on the table and closed his eyes.

He really wished that he was with Castiel and Deanna. He wished that they were driving in the Impala on their way to their next hunt. They would have to flip for whose turn it was to go, but none of them really wanting to leave the other. But Sam couldn't find it in himself to stay away without trying to get Dean to remember the truth. It will always be him and Castiel, but Dean played an important role in his life. Without Dean, Sam will never be whole.

 _ **Four Years Ago:**_

Sam rolled onto his back on the ground breathing in gulps of air. He didn't think he would ever breathe fresh air for a very long time. He knew he would never take the fresh air for granted. He slowly rose to his feet, and looked around. Dozens of trees laid on their side surrounding him. He furrowed his brows. It looked as if a damn bomb went off. Did something happen here?

He turned around and looked down at the hole that he just crawled out of. Sam didn't understand how he was back. He was never supposed to come back as anything but what he was supposed to. He felt himself down not feeling any different. How long has it been? Was it days, months... years? He shook his head. It couldn't have been years, because he would definetly not be the way he was.

"Good, you made it up." Sam spun around instinctively going for a knife that was no longer in his waistband. He cursed. A man with a long tan trench coat stood before. He eyed him up and down and deemed him no immediate threat.

"Who are you?" He asked. Even though he didn't see the man as a threat, didn't mean that he was going let his guard down.

The man tilt his head in wonder. He was examined from head to toe, and he didn't even want to think about the look that he recieved. "I am Castiel. I'm the one who brought you back." Castiel stepped closer ignoring the way Sam tensed up.

"How?" He didn't know how he was able to be brought back unless it was a deal. He quickly dismissed that idea, because he didn't have anyone to make a deal for him. After his father's death, he no longer had anyone.

"Does it matter?" Castiel was genuinely curious about that. "It was very difficult, and I would rather not do it again." Castiel was now standing right in front of Sam. He leaned in closer, "But I would do it again in a heartbeat."

Sam narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

Castiel didn't answer right away. He looked away. Castiel didn't know how to answer that without fear of scaring off the man. Those like him didn't care so much about feelings, but then again... Castiel was much like the others. Castiel had watched the man crawl out of his grave, and vowed right then and there that Castiel was indeed in love with this man.

"Because I would gladly go to the deepest levels of Hell... go through every inch of Heaven to protect you." He looked back at Sam, and there was no doubt that Sam could see that his words were true. "Make no mistake Sam Winchester, I will be more than happy to lay my life down for you."

Sam didn't know why, but he believed the man. He didn't understand why he would say this when they have never met before. Sam backed up and looked around. He didn't know why he would be saved, and he was happy to be back. But despite his gratitude, Sam wasn't going to make the mistake of befriending someone who could possibly be a demon just because he saved him. Sam sighed. He made that mistake once, and as far as he was concerned he wasn't going to do it again.

Sam looked up and said in a clear voice, " _Christo_."

* * *

Castiel leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. He wanted to go back to his daughter with Sam so bad, but he promised Sam that they would bring Dean back with him. He hadn't seen Dean in awhile, and could only assume that he was with Sam. He never regretted being with Sam, and he didn't see that ever happening. He wasn't going to leave him either, and the day that he would ever leave is if Sam told him to, and he wasn't sure he could do it even then.

Being with Sam wasn't the easiest time of his life, but he sure as hell deemed it worth it. Sam was worth all the trouble they had gone through just to be where they were now. If all they had to do was worry about older brothers, the FBI, and hunting the supernatural, he knew they would have the easiest life. With everything they had been through, Castiel wouldn't hesitate to do it again if it meant they would be together.

Castiel didn't know much about love before he met Sam, but now that was the what he felt most toward him.

 _ **Three and a Half Years Ago:**_

Castiel stood next to his family. He rolled his eyes... if he could actually call them that. Not one of them knew the meaning of the word. They would save their own asses before they ever worried about family. What else could he expect from a bunch of dicks?

Standing before him was the man he fell deeply in love with. He never thought he could feel that way about another man, but he didn't question it. He loved Sam, and nothing was ever going to convince him otherwise. The six months that he's been with Sam, he would never take back. In all of his existance, it was the best time of his life. So if that was true... why was he next to his brothers and not Sam?

Sam held out a long silver blade ready to fight. He didn't bother taking out his knife that that damn bitch Ruby gave him seeing as how it would be pointless. It was the only good thing that came out their relationship. He didn't want to be with her, but he was tired of being alone.

Castiel's eldest brother broke the silence. "Sam Winchester, tell us where he is. You know you're no match for all of us."

He growled. There was no way he was going to tell them. He did _not_ go down in the pit for nothing, and he certainly didn't come back as the same man that first went in.

Sam looked to Castiel pleading with his eyes for him. He didn't care about what he was, he fell in love with him. It broke his heart in so many ways seeing Castiel stand with his brothers instead of him, and it hurt more than the day Dean left him. He was promised that Castiel would never leave him, yet here he was. He was standing next to the very same ones that wanted both his brother and him dead.

When Castiel still didn't come to him, Sam felt betrayed. If Castiel didn't see who he was supposed to be with him, then never again will Sam allow anyone to get close to him like Castiel did. He didn't know how many times his heart could take. A heart could only break so many times before there's nothing to break.

Being outnumbered, Sam still didn't back off. If this was how he was going to go, then he would die being the only one who knew where his brother was. "Come on, you know as well as I do that I will never tell you."

Castiel's eldest looked at him with respect. Not many people was smart enough to say no to him. He shrugged. "Fine. I have no problem killing you."

His brothers all stepped forward with nothing but disgust and hatred on their faces. The Winchesters were very much hated by so many. Castiel's heart skipped a beat. No! This wasn't supposed to be like this. He could see the fear and betrayal in Sam's eyes. Sam was scared, and Castiel couldn't blame him. One man against a dozen of his strong brothers.

Castiel promised Sam the day he met him that he would gladly lay down his life for Sam. The moment that he saved Sam was the day that he promised that no one will ever get away with hurting him. No one will ever love him or protect him like he will. That was why he was now standing in front of his eldest brother's dead body.

Castiel looked at the complete shock written on the others' faces. In a clear but no doubt threathening tone, "Make another move to harm Sam in a way, I promise you will find yourself next."

He smirked when the moment that the shock wore off it was replaced with anger. His brother was very much respected and looked up to in his family, so it was no surprise that they wouldn't listen. If Castiel was honest with himself, he was glad. Glad that he could make an example of his brothers to everyone else that he wouldn't hesitate to kill those who set out to hurt Sam.

When no one else was standing except for Castiel and Sam, neither of them said a word. What could be said? Castiel just turned on his family for Sam. Sam looked around at the dead bodies that lay at their feet. Even though he was relieved that they were dead, it didn't mean that Sam was sorry for it. He loved Castiel with all that he had, and he just watched as Castiel killed his family for him.

Sam put up a decent fight for a human, and Castiel was proud. He hated it with a passion that he even had to fight, but was nevertheless proud. As Castiel turned around, he saw Sam sway feeling weak and tired. Castiel got to Sam just in time to catch him as he fell into his arms. He looked down at Sam and pushed aside his hair. He couldn't fight the smile seeing Sam look at him the way he was.

"Why?" Castiel furrowed his brows. "Why did you fight for me?"

Castiel never like the way Sam saw himself. Sam was the most important person in his life, and Castiel added it to the list of promises that he would spend the rest of his life telling Sam that he was worth fighting for until he believed it. He could see that Sam was fighting to stay awake. Castiel lowered his head and gently kissed Sam. He whispered against Sam's lips, "I will fight for you with every breath in my body."

Sam smiled and was succumbing to the darkness. He wanted to believe that he was worth all that Castiel offered to give him. Next to Dean, Castiel was the most important person in his life. He waned to believe him, but after watching Dean walk out on him, and his dad dying he didn't know if he could. Just before he lost consciousness he asked softly, "For how long?"

Castiel watched as Sam went limp in his arms. He checked for wounds and sighed in relief when there were none. Sam only had cuts and bruises. He carefully picked up Sam's blade and then picked up Sam. To anyone else, Sam would look to be fairly heavy, but he was just perfect in Castiel's arms. He walked away carrying the man he would die for.

He whispered knowing that Sam didn't hear, "Until the world stops spinning."

* * *

Dean watched as his brother slept. He stopped paying attention to his team speaking. The longer that this went on, the longer that Dean wasn't caring so much what Sam had done and what he believed. He hadn't seen Sam in a very long time, and now that he was seeing him, regardless of what he's done, Dean knew that he might not have it in him to walk away again.

"Dean, are you okay?" He didn't turn away from watching Sam. Dean didn't answer, but took the coffee that was offered from JJ. She followed his gaze. "You can't hide it forever," she said softly.

"Hide what?" He was praying and praying that she didn't know. He no doubt made it obvious that there was something between him and Sam.

"Whatever it is that's going on here between you two." She chuckled seeing the relief on his face. "Don't think you can hide it from me that there's more to this than you're telling us. You can try and deny it, but I know you Dean. We've been working together for some time now."

He wouldn't bother trying to deny it, when he knew she was right. As much as he trusted her and wanted to get this off his chest, he couldn't. "I-"

JJ cut him off. "Dean, you don't have to tell me the truth, but don't lie to me." She touched his arm, and turned away. "Whenever you're ready to get whatever this is that's going on off your chest, you know where I'll be."

He waited to hear the door click shut. When he did, he sighed. He couldn't take lying to his team. When he joined the BAU, he learned first hand that in order to work efficiently with them, he needed to learn how to trust and be trusted. He watched as his brother slept on. As much as he cared about his team and his job, there were only two people whose trust he cared about. Sam's and...

Dean took out his phone, and hit speed dial. He waited for her to pick up.

 _"What can I do for you sweetheart?"_

"Any luck with the file on Sam's brother?" Please say no, he repeated to himself.

 _"Not yet. I almost have it. I should have it by tomorrow night."_

Dean didn't need to continue speaking to her. He said his goodbyes, and went to call someone he hasn't spoken to in fifteen years. He didn't think he would ever have to call him again... he groaned. With the way he left things and what he was promised, he didn't think he would ever need to.

 _"Dean-o. Been a long time since you called."_

Dean rolled his eyes. "Yeah I didn't think there would ever be a reason to. Ash, when I told you that I wanted Dean Winchester to never be heard from again, I actually meant that."

Ash chuckled on the other line. Dean could hear him opening what he knew was a beer. _"That's exactly what I did. Don't doubt my skills."_

"Oh really? Is that why someone I know is very close to getting into that file? I paid you five grand to make sure no one could get into it."

There was silence on the other line. He had to check to see if Ash was still on the line. _"Who's trying to get into it?"_

"Penelope Garcia."

 _"Damn. She's good. Had a few run ins with her back awhile , I figure that if anyone could break into my work she can."_

"Dammit!" If he didn't pay so much for it, he would have thrown his phone against the wall in anger.

 _"Dean, listen. I told you when you first asked me to get rid of him that he won't be gone forever. He's been gone for fifteen years... count yourself lucky he was able to stay for that long."_ Ash sighed. He was always one for fooling around, so it was rare to hear that sound coming from him. _"One of these days, you're going to have to face up to who you really are."_

Dean looked back at his brother. When he first asked Ash to get rid of Dean Winchester, he was told that his past would never stay in the past. What he refused to believe will show up one day whether he wanted it to or not. It looks like that day might just be right around the corner.

"And who is that?" He was afraid that he already knew the answer, but right now he wasn't in the mood to acknowledge it.

 _"One of us."_ Before Dean could ask what he was talking about, the line went dead.

Dean crossed his arms never looking away from Sam. Even if Dean didn't believe in John's beliefs anymore, that didn't mean that he forgot about those years before he left. He remembered the training that he and Sam were put through. He remembered melting silver into bullets. He remembered thinking that he and Sam were being raised as warriors. Warriors that fought against evil. Warriors that devoted their lives to protecting the innocent. Warriors that believed that they would die fighting those who couldn't fight for themselves. Warriors who die fighting rather than live hiding.

Dean watched as his brother and brother in law slept. When he saw these two men, he saw two warriors with many battle scars. He admired that about them, and he respected Castiel for his devotion to Sam. Dean felt a little jealousy that it was Castiel that there for Sam instead of him. He looked at his reflection in the window. He frowned. When he saw Sam and Castiel, he saw warriors. When he looked at himself, he could only see a traitor.

* * *

 **AN: So, is the supernatural real or too soon to decide? Does it really matter if it does or not? I hope you liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: In the past chapters, Dean has been struggling with his relationship with Sam and his past. Things will only get worse before they can get better. Whether or not it's Sam or Dean's definition of 'better' has yet to be seen... or read. Enjoy!**

* * *

Dean didn't know why he was bothering himself with his team anymore. It wasn't like he was actually listening to them. If he was honest with himself, he didn't care at all. He wasn't even bothered with the looks he was getting from Hotch.

As the rest of his team talked amongst themselves about what they were going to do next, Dean was watching Sam. They normally don't take the word of a suspect, but they don't have anything else to go on. They figured that the child that Sam was holding really was their child. Dean didn't understand why they haven't sent Sam and Castiel off to prison yet if the baby really wasn't kidnapped.

Without a word, Dean walked out ignoring the looks he got from his team. Maybe he did know why they haven't been sent off yet, and if he was right then he had to do whatever he could to make sure it didn't happen anytime soon. He needed more time. Dean didn't know why he was doing this... or maybe he did.

He pulled out his phone, but before he could call he hesistated. Was he really going to risk his job for his brother and some man he didn't know?

 _'You promised we would always be together!'_

 _'I'm always going to be your big brother.'_

Dean hit call and waited. "I need your help," he said before Ash could get in a word. "You owe me."

Ash sighed on the other line _. "What do you need?"_

Dean didn't want to take any more time risking having second thoughts. He didn't really trust Ash, but he figured he could trust him enough for this. "Garcia is very close to getting into that file. I need you to get me as much time as you can."

 _"What do you_ need, _Dean?"_ Ash asked again.

Dean sighed. If he did this and he was found out, he was seriously going to lose his job and maybe more. "I need you to stall her for as long as possible."

 _"She's good, Dean. With her skills, she will get into it."_

Dean rubbed his forehead in frustration. "I know that, but the longer it takes for her to get into it, the more time Sam has before they decide to lock them both up."

 _"Sam's been arrested? Both? You mean Castiel's there too?"_

Dean didn't have time to think about the fact that Ash sounded genuinely surprised at the mention of Castiel getting arrested as well. He decided to ignore him. "Can you do it for me?"

There was silence on Ash's end. _"Yeah. If it's for Sam's benefit I'll keep her from getting into it. How long do you need?"_

Dean had to take a moment to think about that. He didn't need Ash to stall her for days, but he didn't need Ash to stop too soon. "I need at least 24 hours. After that..." Dean trailed off. He didn't know what would happen after that or what he'll do.

 _"Okay. 24 hours. She's good, but I'm better."_ Dean could hear the smug in his voice. He rolled his Dean could hang up _, "Dean, I know you care about your job, I do, but if Sam and Castiel have been arrested... sooner rather than later, you're going to need to decide where your loyalties lie."_

Where did his loyalties lie? He loved his job. He loved putting away the bad guys and helping others. He understood that this job wasn't about being the hero, and that he won't be able to save everyone, but he did love the fact that quite often he's able to bring someone back to their family. He enjoys the feeling he gets when he goes home and can say that he did something right. He came to accept a long time ago, that that doesn't happen too often, but he enjoys it.

 _'Take your brother outside as fast as you can and don't look back! Now, Dean, go!'_

The night his mother died, he almost lost his baby brother. That night he recieved his first order from John. His very first order was to save his brother from a fire. He carried Sam out in his arms. That night, Sam became his. Regardless if he was only four years of age, that night Dean accepted his role in Sam's life. That night, Dean swore to always protect Sam.

He wanted to scream in fury, because whatever he swore that night, he was now looking at his brother sitting in an investigation room. Whatever he promised that night, Sam was in there because of him...

* * *

Castiel couldn't keep sitting down. He was getting restless, and he needed to move. Getting up and walking back and forth, he let his mind wander. Before Castiel could get too lost in his thoughts, the door opened and in walked in Dean and Emily. He tilt his head. He didn't expect to see Dean anytime soon. He could admit he is rather shocked.

"Come on," Dean gestured to the door.

Castiel stayed put. Castiel doesn't make it a habit to listen to anyone other than Sam. "Where?"

"To see Sam. For your cooperation, we're allowing you two to see each other."

At the mention of seeing Sam, Castiel got up. As he passed Dean, Castiel smirked. "You may think you guys are in charge here, Agent Smith, but you don't _allow_ us to do anything."

Dean ignored him not wanting to give in. He didn't see the point in it. Emily guided Castiel to Sam's room while Dean walked behind him. Emily opened the door, and stepped aside so Castiel could walk through. It was a good thing she did otherwise, Dean noticed, Castiel would've pushed her aside just to get to Sam.

Castiel walked passed them and as soon as he saw Sam laying his head down on the table, he didn't see anything else. He bent down and kissed the top of Sam's head. Sam slowly brought up his head and as soon as he saw him, Castiel could see his eyes brightening up. He pulled Sam in an embrace, not caring that Sam was taller than him.

"Are you okay?" he asked pulling apart. He checked Sam over, and saw that he was physically fine.

Sam nodded, but didn't say anything. Even though they haven't been there long, Sam was feeling rather weak. He didn't want to pull out, but he did have second thoughts about it. He was thinking that maybe they should go a different route of getting Dean back. He was even thinking of just going to Dean's home and going about it like that, but with Dean's schedule Sam figured that would be a challenge. Besides, Sam saw that this way would be better for Dean to see the truth. He didn't know how to explain it, but Sam felt that this way was best.

"What's wrong?" Castiel demanded.

Sam was a little embarrassed to say it, but "I'm hungry."

Castiel sighed in relief. He thought it was something big, but if it was simply hunger he could deal with that. He looked around and saw a fast food bag in the garbage and took it out. He peered inside and saw that it was filled with food. "Why haven't you been eating?"

Sam sat back down and shrugged. "They wouldn't tell me if you were eating I wasn't going to eat unless I knew you were."

Castiel shook his head in slight disappointment. He brought the food back and took out its contents. "We'll be discussing this later, but right now you eat."

"Have you eaten?" Castiel pulled the chair around and sat next to Sam. Castiel shook his head. Sam sighed. He took out the hamburger and split it in half. He gave one half to Castiel and with a stern look, Castiel took it. "I need you at your full strength too."

When they were finished eating, Castiel threw the food away. As he sat back down, Castiel leened in. "Baby, are you okay? Do you need something else?"

Castiel and Sam knew each other well enough to know what the other really meant. Sam looked up at Castiel and right away knew what he was really asking. _Do you want to pull out?_ And with the way Castiel narrowed his eyes, Sam knew better than to lie. Sam looked back at the window and could almost feel where Dean was standing watch.

Sam knew right away that if he said yes, Castiel wouldn't argue or get mad. He wouldn't even question it. They talked about the possibility of Sam wanting to leave for a number of reasons, and that if Sam needed to retreat and try again another time, Castiel would go ahead with their escape plan.

Castiel wouldn't get mad at Sam if he did say yes. In fact, they got plenty of information to see that Dean might be coming around with leaving with Sam. He had told Sam that it would be completely understandable if he wanted to pull out. A part of him was hoping that he would say yes, because then they could go to Bobby's and get Deanna. They would have another chance to get Dean back. If they did leave without Dean, he prayed that it wouldn't hurt Sam too much.

* * *

Sam shook his head. "I'm okay. I feel better. I'll let you know if anything changes."

Sam looked back at the window, and pleaded with his eyes that when Dean learned the truth that he would come with them. Sam knew he was being selfish with this whole thing. Dean finally got what he wanted. A life. The part that Sam didn't like... the whole reason that he was here was because Dean believed something that wasn't true. Sam had already promised himself and Castiel that once Dean learned the truth and if he still wanted to stay with the FBI, then Sam would walk away.

 _ **Then:**_

Sam sat in the passenger seat while Castiel drove. He rubbed his swollen belly lovingly. He found comfort he didn't think to find in rubbing his stomach. He smiled at the thought of the fact that there was a baby in there. He felt wonderful carrying a child. Being a man he didn't even think about the possibility of being pregnant. Knowing that he was carring a life inside him, he was already in love. Is this what women felt as they carried a child?

"Cas?"

"Hmm?" Castiel didn't need to look at his partner to know what Sam was doing. He grinned at knowing that the man he loved with all of his heart and soul was carrying their child. Everything he could ever want was right there in the car.

"Do you think I'm being selfish?" Sam asked softly. He didn't turn to look at Castiel afraid of what he would see, just continued to rub his belly.

"What do you mean? You're the most selfless person I know."

Sam shook his head. "With Dean. He's doing what he wanted. Is it right of me to take that away? I don't want Dean to hate me just because I want him back in my life."

Castiel didn't respond instead he pulled the car over. He turned in his seat, and pulled Sam into him. He breathed in the wonderful smell that was all Sam and kissed his head. He could lie to Sam and tell him what he wanted to hear, or he could do the right thing and tell him what he needed to hear.

"Is it right to take away what he wants? No. You wouldn't like it if someone took me away or our baby, right?" Sam shook his head fighting back the tears that wanted out. "But, it's also not right to keep Dean in the dark. It's not right to keep him from the truth when you and I both know something isn't right. Besides he doesn't even know something happened that night. It's best to let him know the truth and let him decide what he wants to do for himself in his right mind. So, whatever you decide to do, I'm behind you every step of the way."

Sam looked up at Castiel. This only proved that Sam wasn't worthy enough to have Castiel as his partner. How could he get so lucky to be loved and wanted by an amazing man? He leaned up and closed the distance between them. "I love you, Castiel."

"I love you, too." And Sam believed him.

"For how long?" Sam didn't like having to ask this of Castiel, but he needed to hear it. He needed to hear it sometimes that Castiel still wanted him. He didn't know what he would do if Castiel stopped loving or wanting him.

Castiel smiled big and held him close. He rubbed Sam's belly wanting to be as close as he could to his baby. "Until the world stops spinning."

* * *

Sam watched as Castiel was taken back an hour later. Dean kept coming when they needed to know something. Sam answered their questions the best way he knew how without giving too much away. The worst part of this whole thing was watching Dean walk out every time. He knew it wasn't like that night, but it still hurt him all the same. It was just a reminder of what he lost.

 _ **Then:**_

Sam got in his car after he made his deal. He couldn't help but feel no regret for what he did. Besides, it's not like the one he made the deal for would ever know what happened. As he drove, he felt lighter. Was that normal? To feel lighter after selling your soul to a demon? He smirked and shook his head. What did he know abour normal. Nothing about his life has ever known normal.

He pulled over and got out. He had six months until he would meet his end. Sam looked around the neighborhood and approved of what he saw. Washington was a nice place to live, and he was proud of his brother for making it on his own when he didn't have much when he left. He watched as his brother came out for his mail, and made his way back inside. Sam looked him over and liked what he saw. Dean looked better than he did living with him and their dad.

Dean's hair was darker and it looked good short. He was taller, and more built. At least h was keeping up with his exercises. Dean's house was just the same as the rest in the neighborhood. Sam scoffed. Fucking suburbs, but Sam smiled nonetheless. Dean got his apple pie life. He even looked happy. Sam was so grateful that Dean didn't have that look in his eyes of a man that saw too much evil in the world. The evil that would drive any human insane.

Sam wondered if his brother had a girlfriend or wife, but quickly dismissed the wife. Nothing about Dean's appearance or house screamed 'married.' Regardless, Sam was perfectly fine making that deal for his brother. In six months, Sam would be dragged into the pit tortured until he became a demon himself, and his brother would be safe from anything supernatural or anything that has to do it with it. That included the ones that hunt them.

Dean came back out in what seemed like jogging clothes. He put his earphones in, and began to stretch. Sam started the car, and before Dean got too close Sam drove away. With Dean too busy with picking a song, Dean never noticed Sam drive passed him.

As Dean was running, he stopped. He took out one of the earphones and looked back. He thought he heard something familiar. He looked down the street and saw the end of a black car disappearing behind the houses around the corner. Dean could've sworn it looked just like- He shook his head. It wasn't possible.

* * *

Dean was messing with his phone, when Morgan's went off. Dean's heart was beating fast knowing who it was. "What do you got Mama?"

 _"Okay, I was very close to accessing Dean Winchester's file."_

Morgan furrowed his brows. Everyone else was paying close attention. "Was?"

 _"Yeah, someone is hacking into my database preventing me from getting into it. The way that this hacker is operating is very familiar. I've seen it before, but I can't remember where. Anyway, whoever this guy is does_ not _want me to see whatever is in that file."_

"Can you get around the hacker? Can you get rid of him?" Emily asked. She didn't know much about hacking, but that could be done, right?

 _"I can do that, but it won't be easy. The guy is basically playing Hide and Seek. He's taking the pieces I need to get in and hiding. Whenever I get close to him, he takes off but he's leaving viruses behind."_

"Alright, do what you can." Morgan hung up.

"So what does this mean?" JJ asked talking to the others but looking at Dean. He made sure not to give anything away in his face. JJ wasn't stupid; she knew Dean was up to something and with the way he's been acting, she knew it wasn't good.

"I don't know, but whoever the hacker is doesn't want us to get into it."

"It could be Dean Winchester?" Rossi suggested. "He may not want us getting into it, because of what's inside."

Hotch didn't answer right away. "It could be. I'm not going to rule him out, but let's also consider the possibility that someone else is involved."

Dean stayed behind as the others left to get something to eat. They've been neglecting their own hunger, and it was time they gave in. Dean said he would eat later. JJ was the last to leave clearly wanting to talk with Dean, but the serious look on his face convinced her otherwise. She would just have to wait until he came to her. It would do no good to push him.

Dean found himself standing in front of the interrogation room. He opened the door, and walked in. Sitting down without a word, he just watched his brother sleep. Seeing Sam in there with him didn't ease the feeling of being a traitor. No matter what anyone said to try and say otherwise, Dean knew damn well that he was betraying his brother.

"Sam?" Sam lifted up his head and wiped the sleep from his face. Now that Sam was awake, he said the first thing that came to mind. "What did you dream about?"

Sam yawned. "Lollipops and candy canes. What do you want, Dean?"

That was the question that Dean hasn't been able to answer in many years. What did he want? He knew that there were two parts of him that were fighting for control. Was he wrong for not knowing what he wanted more? His own life or his brother. Here he was, Dean Smith FBI agent, sitting across from a man that committed terrible crimes. Dean Smith who has helped put away many criminals, regretfully killed a few. Dean Smith who had a wonderful home in Washington. Dean Smith who had several degrees and graduated from college.

But... he was also, Dean Winchester. He was a big brother, sitting across from his little brother who he hasn't seen in fifteen years. Dean Winchester who wants nothing more than to get Sam and Castiel out of there. Dean Winchester who wanted to run away with Sam and not look back. Dean Winchester who wanted to meet his niece who may or may not have come from Sam. Dean Winchester who didn't care at all if Sam and Castiel believed in monsters.

He cleared his throat and asked, "What are _you_ doing here, Sam? What do _you_ want?"

Here he was Dean Smith who was fighting a losing battle against Dean Winchester. Dean Smith who wanted nothing more... than to _be_ Dean Winchester.

* * *

 **AN: Thoughts? I hope you liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: Fighting in relationships can cause many issues in a relationship. It could even damage the relationship so much that it would drive the couples apart. But in many circumstances fighting is very healthy... if it's done right. There's no such thing as a perfect couple and fighting will occur, but it depends on both parties whether or not they let it pull them apart.**

* * *

 _ **Then:**_

Sam craddled his swollen belly as he drifted off to sleep. He begged Castiel to take him to Washington. He wanted to see Dean so bad. He remembered what Castiel had told him awhile ago. He thought about what he wanted to do.

Castiel drove the car down to Washington to see his brother in law. He didn't really want to see him, because he was afraid of what it might do to Sam if things didn't go the way Sam wanted. Looking at Sam, Castiel knew that no matter what he would do anything if it meant that Sam would be happy. Looking back at his life, Castiel never thought he would be this far gone for someone like Sam.

Sam was jerked awake when Castiel shook him. He wiped the sleep from his face and looked around. He recognized the area, because not too long ago he was there seeing Dean on his own. Castiel couldn't always be with him, because of what they do. Now that he was pregnant, Castiel did all the hunts they came across. Sam missed hunting very much, but he made up for it with doing most of the research.

When Sam had gotten so far into his pregnancy that he wouldn't be able to go on hunts until the baby was born, Castiel was adamant about hunting. He wanted to stay with Sam through the whole process, but Sam knew that Castiel wanted to hunt just as much. They agreed that Castiel would still hunt, but the length in between each one wasn't too small.

Castiel got out of the car, and went around to help Sam out. It wasn't possible for men to get pregnant. They just didn't have the parts that could do it, so from anyone else Sam just looked like an overweight man. Knowing this, Sam had no problem going out in public with his belly. Even though he was perfectly fine with displaying his stomach, that didn't mean he was going out of his way to show it off; which was why he had a very large sweater on.

Walking down the street with his husband, Sam felt very sad and disappointed. Why? Because as they were walking passed Dean's home Sam asked Dean, who was out getting his mail, for directions. What happened? Dean gave them a smile and the directions he asked for. What happened after? Dean made his way back into his home. So yeah, Sam was sad and disappointed that his big brother didn't recognize him. What was he expecting? Dean hasn't seen him in almost fifteen years. Sam had no one to blame but himself for getting his hopes up.

Sam and Castiel walked down the street, but they were still close enough to keep Dean's house in sight. Sam leaned into Castiel and sighed. Castiel wrapped his arm around Sam's waist. "What's wrong?"

"Should we be doing this? Should I?"

Castiel didn't have to ask to know what he was talking about. Sam had been questioning their actions since he had brought it up. Sam wanted to know if he should be getting Dean's attention the way they were instead of just going up to Dean in person. Castiel had told him that it would make things simple, but also said that Sam had to go with his instinct.

Sam thought that he just needed to go up to Dean's door, ring the bell and tell him exactly who he was. Then he wouldn't have to make himself known in their hunts to get Dean's team to notice him. It was bad enough that he's already on their list for the crimes he's committed. He looked at the house his brother owned and was proud of him. Dean did so much better than either him or their dad had ever though possible.

Sam pulled away from Castiel not thinking about what he was doing. Castiel didn't say anything, but Sam felt him following him. Was he wrong for possibly ruining his brother's happiness all because he wanted him back in his life? Was he being selfish for taking away his brother's new life just so he can be in Sam's? Was he a terrible husband that he couldn't just be happy with Castiel? Was it wrong of him that he was happy with Castiel, but wanted Dean to be apart of it?

He didn't know the answers to any of these questions which was why he was standing in front of Dean's door.

* * *

Sam wanted Dean in his life and to have the chance to be in his. He missed his brother more than anything. He cradled one hand around belly, and the other ready to knock. He took a deep breath, and just before he knocked, he realized something. He couldn't do it. His hand froze, and no matter how hard Sam wanted to knock, he couldn't. He couldn't make himself known to his brother. Maybe he would have if Dean recognized him by his mailbox, but now he couldn't.

Sam stepped away from the door. A single tear fell down his face, but he didn't bother wiping it away. He couldn't do this. He couldn't trade his brother's happiness for his own selfish wants. Sam loved his brother, and if that was true then there was no way he could knock and introduce himself. There was no way he could go in there and bring back the past that Dean wanted to leave behind. He loved his brother so much that he walked away.

As Sam made his way back to Castiel, Sam knew right then and there that their plan to bring back Dean was over. It was no longer needed. Sam was going to be the good brother and leave Dean alone. He was going to accept that this was what his brother wanted. As long as one of them were happy, that was enough for Sam.

* * *

Castiel steered Sam to the car and guided him in. He needed to get them back to their motel. He felt that he was in his right to be angry at this whole situation. He didn't want to take it out on Sam, but he was getting to the point where he didn't care. They both knew that he got angry just like everyone else. Closing the door behind him, Castiel took over doing the salt lines. He wanted to make sure that even though he was angry he wasn't going to let that stop him from protecting Sam and their baby.

Sam struggled to take of his shoes to get relaxed. He didn't like constantly asking Castiel to do it for him. He would be lying if he didn't feel the tension from the car. A part of him knew why Castiel was angry, but another part didn't want to see it. That part figured that if he didn't see it, it wasn't there.

Sam was well aware that regardless if he was gentle and caring to him, Castiel did have his moments. If Sam were honest, he would hate to be in a relationship with someone who was always happy. It just meant that they were hiding their struggles from him. He wanted his partner to scream and yell if it meant they weren't holding it in. Castiel had handled his moments in the past and there were many, so Sam was perfectly fine dealing with Castiel's.

He sighed. Sam wasn't going to just sit there and pretend not to notice his partner's inner struggles. When Castiel got angry, he didn't hold back. So, Sam figured that now would be the best time to get whatever he's angry with out in the open. Even when Castiel got angry Sam wasn't afraid of him, but that didn't mean he liked it.

"Cas, what's wrong?"

Castiel didn't answer right away, but instead tried to calm himself down. He hardly ever got angry, and he didn't want to risk hurting Sam. He was calming down, but when he looked back at Sam and saw the pain in his eyes from Dean it all came back. He kept his distance from Sam just to be on the safe side.

"What's wrong?!" Castiel laughed with no hint of humor. "What's wrong is the fact that you still want to see Dean even though he left you for 'normal.' What's wrong is the fact that you don't seem too upset by it. You just accept it!"

Sam knew it was better to let Castiel get it all out with no interruptions, but sometimes he needed Castiel to know that he was just as angry with this whole situation as he was. He struggled to his feet but stayed away from Castiel.

"Screw you!" Sam yelled. "I'm beyond pissed off by this whole thing. Don't you dare say that I've accepted this. I hate that Dean left me alone to deal with John, but I hate it more that my own fucking brother didn't even recognize me when I've spent the last ten years watching him."

Castiel rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "What about the fact that you spend so much fucking time trying to get Dean back, that you forget that I'm here! What about me?" Castiel stepped closer to Sam with fury written all over his face.

Sam stepped back not because he was afraid, but to protect his belly. He knew that Castiel would never intentionally hurt him or their daughter, but Castiel was too unpredictable when he was angry. He knew that after this fight, Castiel would apologize nonstop for risking their child's life. So it was best to limit how much Castiel would have to apologize for.

"Don't come any closer, Cas." Sam ordered putting his hand out. "You want to yell at me, fine, but don't you dare come closer to me."

Castiel smirked. Sam gulped. It was the same smirk that he gave the monsters that they hunted. Sam had seen it enough to know what the meaning behind it was.

"What's wrong, Sammy? You afraid? You afraid I'm going to hurt you?" Castiel was just all the more closer. "What about me? What about all the hurt you've caused me with your desperate attempt at getting Dean back? I know for a fact that if Dean wasn't your brother, there would be no need for me. Have you ever thought about what this all doing to me?!" He yelled.

Sam stopped when his back hit the wall. "Of course I've thought it. I've told you as much as we've talked about this that you're enough for me. You know damn well why I want Dean in my life. I love you, Castiel. When will you believe that?"

Castiel shook his head. "You don't love me, Sam. Stop lying! If I was enough for you... if you loved me, we wouldn't be going through so much trouble trying to get your damn brother back. Do you realize what I've gone through for you because I love you? Do you realize that I've given up everything that I know because I love you? I helped you stop the end of the world. I saved you from the pit damn all the consequences from both sides. I married you even though you're not like me. I've killed to protect you."

Castiel was now standing right in front of Sam. Sam could see the tears behind his anger. He wanted to speak but his voice wouldn't obey. He couldn't even look away. "I would die for you, Sam, and you know that. In fact, I have. I betrayed my family because I love you. I killed them for you. Why aren't I enough for you? Dean's your brother and you love him. I understand that, but what about me? What happens if Dean comes with us? Am I going to be pushed aside? Am I going to be thrown out because you finally got your brother back? What happens if he doesn't come with us? Am I going to have a husband that won't be happy unless their brother is there?"

That cut Sam so deep, he didn't ever think it would heal. "I know exactly what you've done for me. I was there you asshole! I tell you all the time... I even show you that you're it for me. I want you... I need you. When will you understand that I need Dean in ways that a husband can't give me? But my needs for you are just as greater and more important than my needs for him."

Castiel looked down and closed his eyes fighting back the tears. He wanted to desperately to be enough for Sam, but he knew that he never would be. It will always be Dean that Sam needs. Castiel would always come second to a man that ran out on his family. He looked up Sam and still pissed he slammed his hands on each side of Sam head. He ignored the slight fear in Sam's eyes, and the way that Sam covered his belly.

"When I am going to be enough for you?" Without waiting for an answer, Castiel walked away. He made his way to the door.

Sam jumped back when Castiel hit the wall. He was scared, but not of what Castiel did. No. He was scared of how much hurt Castiel was feeling all because of wanting Dean. He was scared as he watched Castiel made his way to the door. His heart skipped a beat. He couldn't let this happen.

"Castiel, don't leave." Sam followed Castiel and tried to reach out to him, but Castiel pulled away.

"Why? It's not like you ever wanted me here anyway. I was just here until you got Dean back." Castiel opened the door.

Sam fell to his knees holding his pregnant belly. He looked up at Castiel and felt tears falling down his face. It was happening all over again. "Don't leave me. You promised we would always be together! You can't leave me here alone."

Castiel didn't move, but he didn't say anything either.

"You can't break your promise to me," Sam said softly.

With his back still to Sam, he said with as little emotion as he could. "I can't leave someone alone who never wanted me to begin with." Sam didn't hear anything else but the terrible sound of the door slamming shut. Sam shut his eyes tight and cried.

* * *

Sam didn't know how, but he found himself on the bed. He looked at the clock on the wall, and saw that it was three in the morning. He frowned. Castiel had been gone for ten hours. He buried his face in the pillow and sobbed. He had been hoping that after an hour or two that Castiel would come back. After four hours, Sam thought that Castiel was caught up in something that needed his attention. Maybe that something was preventing him from coming back. After seven hours, Sam was getting a little angry that Castiel was focusing on whatever it was that was getting his attention instead of coming back. After ten hours, Sam gave into the belief that Castiel wasn't coming back.

His daughter decided to make herself known and gave a small kick. Sam smiled sadly, and touched his stomach. "I miss him, too." Sam had expressed his missing Dean very much to Castiel, but right now he wasn't even thinking about Dean. Right now he was missing Castiel so much more than he ever did Dean.

Around five in the morning, Sam felt himself being woken up. He didn't move to notice who it was. He didn't have to open his eyes to confirm who he knew it was. Sam just needed to feel to recognize who it was that was wrapping their arm around him pulling him into their chest. Breathing in the man's cologne, Sam cried once again.

"I'm sorry," Sam said breaking the silence between the two. "I'm sorry for making you think you weren't enough for me. I love you so much, and you're everything that I could ever hope to have in my life. I'm sorry that you've given up everything you know for me. I'm sorry that I want Dean back in my life. I'm sorry that I-"

Sam was silenced when Castiel pressed his lips against his. They went on like that for a short time until Castiel pulled back. "You don't have to be sorry. I know you love me. I guess I let my jealousy get in the way of that. I know how much I mean to you, because you get the same look on your face when you see me as I do when I look at you."

Sam pulled Castiel in closer and buried his face in Castiel's chest. "Why did you come back?"

Castiel chuckled softly. He put his cheek against Sam's head. "For someone as smart as you, you sure are dumb." He whispered, "I came back, because I love you with all my heart and soul. I've been outside the whole time. I'm so sorry for leaving at all. I know how much that reminded you of Dean leaving."

"Please, don't ever leave me again." Sam pratically begged. He didn't know if he could go through something like this again. He could handle their fighting. Sam knew it was healthy for couples to fight, but watching Castiel leave the way he did Sam didn't know if he could go through that again.

"Never," Castiel choked out. Leaving Sam was the hardest thing he's ever done. Even though he was only outside, he still heard Sam's crying. It hurt him more than being killed by Lucifer. He swore to Sam that no one would ever harm Sam as long as Castiel was there. He just didn't realize that his leaving would cause Sam more hurt than he could ever get from someone else. Even from Dean...

"I will never leave you, and I'm so sorry for hurting you. I promise that I will stay by your side." He could feel Sam drifting off to sleep. Castiel promised that in the morning, Sam would eat the food that he had brought. He was about to drift off as well, when he heard Sam speak.

"How long will you stay with me?" Sam mumbled tiredly. All that crying and worrying made him tired, and now that Castiel was back Sam could give into the darkness knowing that he won't wake up alone.

Castiel said softly, but no doubt lovingly, his usual response. No matter how many times he would need to say it to Sam, the words would never mean anything less than the first time he said it. If anything, after what they've gone through to get here, it meant so much more. "Until the world stops spinning."

* * *

Castiel was awoken by the scream of his name and a pillow to the face. He sat up and looked to the source of the screams. He jumped to his feet when he saw that it was Sam yelling for him. Sam was hunched over holding his belly.

"What's wrong?" asked Castiel in full panic mode.

"The baby," Sam said through clenched teeth. "The baby's coming."

Castiel's eyes widened. He went to grab the keys to the Impala. He pulled out his phone and called the doctor that they've been seeing for the passed nine months.

 _"Castiel?_ _What's wrong?"_ Castiel could tell by the sound of her voice that she was asleep. He rolled his eyes when he thought how stupid he was. It was six-thirty in the morning.

"The baby's coming!" Castiel screamed into the phone. He was already getting Sam into the back of the car. This was his first child, so he was obviously going to freak out.

 _"Okay. First of all, calm down. Until that baby is born, right now Sam doesn't need you to be freaking out with him. He needs you to stay calm for him."_

"I'm as calm as I'm going to be!"

 _"Second, you two need to get your asses here quickly. How far are you guys out?"_ By his silence the doctor knew the answer. _"Okay. I need you to-"_

"Hello?" Castiel said when he didn't hear anything else. He looked at the phone and cursed when he realized his battery had died out. "Fucking phone." He threw it to the seat next to him and floored the gas pedal.

This was the only time Sam wished he was a woman. Because if he was a woman, then he could just go to the nearest hospital, but no! He had to have been a man and could only see a doctor that knew of the supernatural and of their situation. If he would've known that he was going to give birth, he would've skipped seeing Dean and gone straight to the doctor. He was about two weeks early, so he would obviously not think about giving birth. Now they were fucked.

"Cas," Sam said through his deep breaths.

Castiel didn't want to turn away from the road. He was going so fast, he was breaking every traffic law there was. He even managed to lose a police car. "What?"

"How far out are we?"

Castiel didn't want to frighten Sam, but this wasn't something he should lie to Sam about. He rubbed his face in frustration. "Too far."

There was silence in the back for a few moments. Until, "Pull over."

Castiel looked around. They were in the middle of nowhere. There was nowhere to pull over to. He expressed this to Sam, but only got an evil glare in return. So, he did as he was told. He got out and went to the back to check on Sam. He got Sam's phone, and cursed once again when he saw that Sam's phone was dead. Of all the time for their phones to die it had to be right when they needed them most. Seeing the state Sam was in, Castiel knew that their daughter was coming. So if they were going to go through with the birthing process, Castiel needed to get what they needed... now.

* * *

Castiel helped Sam up to lean against the door. He wished that they had a third person to help, because he wanted to hold Sam's hand so bad. He looked up and down the road and knew that they were on their own. He was going to have to deliver their baby girl himself. Then again even if someone was there, he didn't trust anyone enough to be anywhere near Sam. He didn't even trust the doctor they were going to go see, but he knew that Sam needed her.

He ripped off Sam's pants and got out the spell that they had planned to use to change Sam's body so he could deliver naturally. And right now that included going through it all without any medication. Medication that would've helped Sam through this. Saying the spell, Castiel had to wait for it to do what it needed to. Castiel was too busy trying to calm down Sam to see his parts changing.

Castiel was in the trunk getting a blanket and some water when he heard Sam.

"Cas!" Sam yelled. It was then that Castiel realized that their daughter was coming. He positioned himself in front of Sam, and coached him through it. Sam was in so much pain, and he didn't think he would ever have to give birth to their daughter with no medication to help. He loved her so much, but right now he just wanted her out.

"Castiel," Sam said through his tears and pushing, "I don't want to be pregnant anymore."

He heard a chuckle. "After she comes out, you won't be."

Sam pushed a few more times crying out in pain. He struggle out, "I'm never getting pregnant again."

"I promise never to knock you up again. Let's hope that God only meant for you to have one child."

It went on like this for awhile. Sam would push and yell, and Castiel would take it and coach him through the pain.

"Is she out yet?" Sam asked leaning back against the door with tears falling down his face.

"I think you would know that better than anyone," Castiel said. But the annoyed look on Sam's face, Castiel cleared his throat. "Not yet."

Sam was in so much pain, and wanted this to be over. He even thought about giving up. He was regretting so much for deciding to do this naturally. It would've been so much easier with a C-section. He didn't know why he thought he wanted this.

"I don't want to do this anymore. I can't." He shook his head feeling so many tears fall down. He was still pushing when he needed to, but he wanted to stop. Then something convinced him otherwise.

 _"Don't you give up, Sam!"_ Sam looked around. He knew that wasn't Castiel's voice, but it sounded familiar. _"Don't you dare think about giving up! You can do this. I need you to do this. Do it for her."_ And that's what he did.

Castiel watched as slowly but surely their baby girl was coming out. Castiel readied himself to help her. Sam gave several more pushes and he fell back in relief when she finally came out. Castiel held her, and with the scissors that they had kept in the trunk he cut the cord.

Sam fell back in relief and exhaustion when he felt her come out. He even felt relief when he heard her cry. He tried to keep his eyes open long enough to see Castiel take care of her. He couldn't really get a good look at her, but he trusted Castiel knew what he was doing. When Castiel was done with everything he needed to do, he got in and placed her in Sam's arms. He closed the door, and got in on the passenger side and looked down at the two people he loved more than himself... more than life itself.

* * *

Sam looked down at his baby. The same baby that he had carried for nine months. The same baby that was a gift from God. The same baby that both he and Castiel helped make. He loved her. He didn't care about the pain he had felt and was still feeling. Looking at their daughter, he knew he would go through it all again if it meant to have what he was now holding.

Sam looked up at Castiel and smiled. "I love you."

Castiel leaned over and kissed the top of Sam's head. He touched her head and knew that this was just another reason to add to his list on why he loved Sam. She was beautiful. She had chubby cheeks, and her eyes were bright blue with a hint of green in them.

"Sam, I want you to get Dean back." It came out of nowhere but as soon as those words left Castiel's mouth, he knew they were true.

Sam shook his head. "No. You're enough for me. I only need you."

"And you have me, but you need him to. I'm okay with that. I understand that there are things only a brother could give. I was selfish to think that I can have you all to myself. Besides, I can't have all of you when there's a part of you that is only meant for Dean. Just as I know that a part of him is only meant for you and you alone."

Hearing Castiel say that, Sam knew recognized that voice. Maybe it was all in his head, but it didn't matter. Sam knew without a doubt that that voice was Dean's. "I'm sorry for making you think I didn't want you."

Castiel sighed. "I was wrong to make you think that I was the only one that has given up so much in this relationship. If anything, you've given up just as much." Sam was about to speak, but Castiel cut him off. "No. Hear me out. You gave up all you knew about the supernatural to be with me. You knew what I was, but you didn't let that get in the way of loving and accepting me. Everything you've ever learned from your dad and what you've hunted told you to kill me, but you gave me the chance to prove to you that I do love you. Even when it was me and you against many of our enemies, you still trusted me to protect you. Regardless of everything I did for you, you did just as much for simply loving me. So if you want Dean with us, I'm with you... until the world stops spinning."

Sam and Castiel stood where they were for quite some time. She had latched onto Sam's nipple and began to drink. Sam felt wonderful at the feeling, and he would be sad when the day would come for her to be too old for this.

"Now, what do you want to name her?" asked Castiel. It came time for them to make their way to Sam's doctor. Castiel drove and waited for Sam's answer. They didn't spend as much time thinking about names as they should have. Sam thought of potential names for their child, but looking at her sleeping in his arms he knew.

 _"I love you, Sam."_ Sam smiled at the voice. He didn't know how he was hearing his brother, but he loved it. It was like Dean was whispering it in his ear behind him.

"Deanna." She opened her eyes and it like she looking into his soul. "Deanna Cassie Winchester."

* * *

 **AN: So no relationship, not even Sam and Castiel's, are perfect. Next chapter will pick from the last. I hope you liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: I hope you guys are liking knowing more about Sam and Castiel's past. Just in case you didn't know, Deanna's middle name wasn't named after Dean's old girlfriend. That'll just be weird.**

 **So plenty of you have wondered what would happen if/when the BAU finds out about who Dean really is or if Dean tells them himself. Well, now we get to find out. Enjoy!**

* * *

As Dean sat there across from his brother, he was fighting against his inner wants to his inner needs. Dean knew this would be his only chance to talk to Sam privately. Since his team hasn't eaten for awhile, he figured he would have maybe an hour at most with him. He needed to make the most of it before things went downhill, or up... depending on what he chose to do with what Sam would tell him.

"I asked you first," Sam said folding his hands on the table not breaking eye contact.

Dean sighed. "I want to know what happened the night I left."

Sam studied him. He knew that Dean would eventually want to know what happened after he left, and of course Sam would tell him. He looked away. A part of him didn't want to tell him. He didn't want pity or concern, and he knew that's what he would get after he told Dean. Then again, that wasn't the real reason why he didn't want to tell his brother. He didn't want to tell him, because what was the point? Dean didn't believe in the supernatural anymore, so all Dean might hear is child abuse.

Sam thought about telling Dean everything that has happened to him, or what he's been involved in for a long time, but he was afraid of what it would do to him once he knew everything.

"I know you don't believe it anymore, but do you remember how you behaved when Dad told you to do something?"

"Yeah."

"Tell me."

"Sam, I-" The look on Sam's face made him stop. Dean rubbed his forehead not wanting to answer, but if he wanted answers he would have to give up a few. "I followed every one of his orders. No matter what he told me, I did it. I trusted him to know what was best for us. I didn't question anything he said to me, because I believed he knew what he was doing."

Sam nodded. "Do you remember how I was?"

Dean looked behind Sam not wanting to look him in the eyes. He remembered exactly how Sam was. "You did the exact opposite. You wanted to know why we had to do whatever he told us to. You had to know the why of everything. You were a curious bastard."

"Do you remember what I called you?" Dean didn't answer, but Sam knew he remembered. It was something that really hurt Dean when Sam got angry with him. Sam chuckled at the irony. "After you left, _I_ became Dad's 'perfect soldier.'"

Dean didn't know what to say. The way he was brought up was hard, but he still did it. Growing up, Dean wanted more than anything for Sam to never have to know what that was like. John never abused them, but now looking back, as a cop, he did. It was child abuse; all the evidence was there. John may never have physically hurt them, but everything else was abuse. John neglected them so bad that they should've been taken away. As part of the FBI, he's seen his fair share of neglectful parents, so why does Dean believe otherwise?

"After I left, I was praying that you would've gotten out. I remember you said you wanted to be a lawyer," Dean mumbled looking at his hands. He should've known. Leaving Sam with John, Dean should've known that only a fool would still believe that.

Sam sighed. "I did. I really wanted to get out. There were plenty of times growing up that I wanted to."

"So, why didn't you? You didn't have to do any of this." Dean hated that he sounded like a child.

Sam shook his head. "I've had so many chances to leave, and I almost did on many occasions. Something always happened that made me change my mind. Then a few years ago, I met Castiel and what we went through I finally understood that hunting is my life. I love what I do, Dean.

"Saving people, finding the killers is a part of your job. You do it all the time, but the police can't do what we can. They don't know what to look for. The evidence showing you exactly where the killer is could be staring you right in the face, and you will never see it, because you wouldn't know what to look for. That's what we do."

Dean shook his head. "No. This last girl that both you and Castiel had shot was innocent. The people before that was innocent."

"That's exactly what I'm talking about. They were all werewolves and they hurt people. That last girl, we were told that she hurt her little brother so bad that he's in the hospital as an animal attack. The worst part? She didn't even know she did it. Every time she would change she would hurt someone and eventually she would've killed someone. There's no cure for being a werewolf, otherwise we would've given it to her and the others."

Sam lowered his head and wanted to reach out to Dean, but he stopped himself. "I don't hurt anyone, and neither does Castiel because we want to. We have to do it, because it's our job. We stop the bad guys just like you. The only difference there is is our definition of 'bad guys.'"

Dean wanted so bad to believe him and he didn't want to admit yet, but he was starting to. The more he heard Sam talk about what he does, the more it makes sense. The civilian half of him believes that there are things out there that can't be explained... or can't be explained where people would believe it. But the FBI agent in him believes that whatever bad and evil is out there is simply human killers with strange methods.

"If I remember correctly, John taught us very well to avoid attracting any attention from the police. So why did you?"

* * *

Sam didn't respond right away. "I'm sure you all have deduced that I did it all to get the attention of someone, right?"

Dean nodded. "Who?"

Sam laid his cheek on his hand, and just stared at his brother. "I'm sure we both know who I was trying to attract, otherwise you wouldn't be in here. You asked me what I want. Well, what I want is something I'm starting to doubt I can have."

Dean's heart skipped a beat at that. He wanted to laugh at that. It sounded very intimate, and Dean knew that if it wasn't for the fact that Sam was his brother, he would've taken it as something romantic. When Dean looked Sam in the eyes, he knew what Sam was trying to get at. It was something he had been feeling for many years(in a non incest way).

When Dean was in college, he had always felt that his place needed to be with his brother. Even if he was married and happy with children, he knew for a fact that he would never be completely happy unless he was with Sam. Seeing the way Sam was, seeing that he was married with a child, he knew that Sam was felt the same.

Was it strange that two brothers couldn't be completely happy without the other? Was it wrong?

* * *

"When I left," Dean started slowly, "what happened?"

"When you left, Dad came back and told me that one day we would meet again. Dad wanted to go look for you, I know he did, but I convinced him not to. I decided that only one us could have 'normal,' and I let that be you. I took up your role as Dad's second. I threw out all thoughts of being a lawyer, have a wife and family, and I accepted that I wasn't getting out. I got my GED as soon as I could. Hunting became my full time job."

"You didn't finish school?" The more he listened to Sam speak, the more he hated that he left. If he would've stayed, he would've made damn sure that Sam finished. He knew that Sam wanted to go to college, and never did Dean ever think Sam would've dropped out.

"No." Dean could hear the sadness and distant longing in his voice. "I believed that hunting was the only way that I would see you again, so I gave it my entire focus. Now here we are."

Dean wanted so badly to knock some sense into his brother. "Why didn't you just come find me? Why do all this to get my attention when just coming to me would've avoided all of this?"

"I did find you... many times. I tracked you down and found where you lived. Anytime I was in the area, I came to check on you. You may have stopped using protection from the supernatural, but I couldn't let you be vulnerable in case something came and I wasn't there."

Dean ignored the fact that Sam knew where he lived and had come to see him. He would deal with that later. Dean was too focused on Sam to realize that he thought about talking to Sam 'later.' He narrowed his eyes, "What did you do?"

Sam smirked. "Let's just say," he leaned forward as if he were telling Dean a secret, "your house is the most protected building against anything supernatural in the world. When I met Castiel, I had to go back and make new wards. Regardless if you're a civilian, any hunter would love to have your place as a safe house."

"What- Why would you do that?"

Sam shrugged his shoulders. "Just because you forgot who you really are doesn't mean the supernatural has."

* * *

Dean said breaking the silence. "What do you want Sam? And give me a straight answer."

Dean could see complete loss in his eyes. "I want my brother to come back to where he belongs. Dean Winchester is supposed to be with me, but now he's playing dress up as a member of the FBI."

"Sam, I'm sorry, but Dean Winchester is gone. I don't want to be a part of that life." Dean shook his head as if trying to shake away his old life. "What's the point if I do go back anyway? None of it was ever real. How can I hunt something that doesn't exist?"

Sam sighed heavily. "You really don't know what happened that night, do you?"

Dean stopped abruptly. He tilt his head in confusion. "What night? You mean _that_ night?" Sam nodded. It didn't take long for Dean to conjure up that night. If he were honest, Dean never forgot about it, just like he never forgot about the night he left. "I remember we went after an innocent woman who believed in witchcraft, and you killed her for it. That was all."

"No, Dean. That wasn't all that happened." Sam was almost reaching his breaking point. He needed to badly for Dean to remember. He needed his brother back more than he needed air.

"What do you mean?"

Sam slumped in his chair and sighed. "It doesn't matter. Are you going to believe me if I tell you?" Dean's silence was answer enough. "I'm here because I want my brother back. When you know the whole truth, and you want to stay here I won't bother you again. You'll never hear from us again, but I do hope that won't be that case. I want you to come with us... where you belong."

Dean didn't know what to say to all of this. His two identities were fighting against each other, and he's not sure who will come out on top. Dean isn't ready to admit it, but he really hopes Dean Winchester wins. He knows for a fact that if he does, his team won't know what hit them. If Dean Smith were to win, he's not sure he's able to see what it would do to Sam.

Even though Dean left his brother and John behind, he never forgot what he was taught about family. He always kept it close to heart. Looking at his little brother on the 'wrong' side of the law made him very disappointed. He wasn't disappointed with Sam, but with himself. Sam isn't supposed to be here with Castiel. Regardless if the supernatural was real or not, Sam was supposed to be here with him.

Dean sighed. He feels really stupid. It's not like Sam is to blame for his irrational jealousy. He's not supposed to feel hurt that Sam was with someone else, when it was supposed to be them two against the world. Seeing how well Sam looked and grew, he was grateful that Castiel gave him something that Sam deserved more than anyone. He felt grateful that Castiel was there for Sam when he wasn't.

"Who are you Dean?"

* * *

Dean scoffed. Wasn't that a bitch of a question. He stared at the clock, and determined that his team would be back in about twenty minutes. "How long have you been married?"

Sam allowed Dean to change the subject. He knew that Dean needed time to come to terms with who he was... if he wanted to. Now matter how bad Sam wanted his brother, he wouldn't force Dean to see the truth if he really didn't want to. Being asked about Castiel brought an instant smile to his face.

"About three years."

"Wow. I didn't even know you were gay. You never showed any interest in guys when we were younger."

"I'm not interested in men." Seeing Dean tilt his head in confusion, he continued, "I guess I'm only gay for him. I fell in love with _him_ not what parts he has. You could say I would've fallen for him even if he were a woman and vice versa."

Dean nodded his head. He respected that. If he found someone that he loved as much as Sam loved Castiel, he wouldn't care what parts they had either. "How did you meet him?"

"You want the truth?" Dean nodded. "He rescued me from Hell."

Dean looked around trying to figure out what Sam meant. "You mean you were in a bad spot and he helped you out? Were you in trouble?"

Sam shook his head with a smile. "No, I mean literally Hell. He found me down there and rescued me."

Dean believed that Sam believed that so he went along with it. "Why did you go to Hell?"

Sam studied Dean for a short while as if he were deciding if or what he was going to tell him. "I'll tell you what. You decide who you really are, and no matter who you choose I'll tell you."

Dean accepted that, but it was hard to accept everything else. He fell back in his chair. "Why is it so important that I decide who I really am? Why is it that you guys went through so much for me?"

"Because of what happened that night, I believe that my brother is in there somewhere. I believe that Dean Winchester is desperately wanting out, but he can't because of what happened. It's important that you know the truth. You want to play FBI agent, fine! But I want you to choose knowing the truth. If that's not something you want, then tell me!"

Sam rose to his feet, so Dean followed. He could see Sam's eyes were glistening. "What difference does it make? You both are arrested for so many crimes. You both broke the law, and now you have to pay for what you both have done."

Sam shook his head ignoring that. "Tell me Dean! Do you want to continue this life pretending to be someone else? Do you really want to stay here? If you do, then tell me! I'm getting too old for this, Dean. I'm getting tired of chasing someone who doesn't want to be caught. I have my own family. I have a daughter that's out there without me and Castiel. A daughter that I want you to meet. A daughter who I'm missing terribly. I have a husband who is sitting in another room being talked down to by the police like they know him. A husband who wants nothing more than to make me happy... for you!"

Dean wasn't going to stand there and be blamed. "Then why are you here? If you have all that, then why did you go to all this trouble to get my attention? Why didn't you just come to me and tell me this to my face?"

"I have gone to you, but you didn't know me. Do you know how much that hurts? To see your brother and not even be recognized? I'm here because I was tired of waiting for you fucking FBI to make a move against me. I'm here because we allowed you guys to catch us. I'm here because you don't give up on family. Ever!"

"What happened that night, Sam? What happened that night that makes you think you're not just a delusional man?"

Sam opened his mouth to finally answer. He's been waiting for years to be able to tell Dean this. This was what he's been waiting years to explain to Dean. He had been hoping to tell Dean under different circumstances, but he couldn't wait anymore. But before he could, he heard a heavy knock on the glass behind Dean.

* * *

Dean heard the knock, and cringed inwardly when he knew who that was. He looked at the clock, and cursed when he noticed that it was ten minutes passed the hour that his team was supposed to be gone. He heard it again when he didn't move. He gave Sam a last backward glance and left.

He took a moment to collect himself before he walked in. He opened it and saw every one of his team staring back at him. They displayed different emotions from confusion, shock, anger, and disappointment. Dean didn't know which one was worse.

"What's up?" He said as casually as he could.

Hotch stepped forward, and Dean could see a file in his hands. He held his breath as his heart beat erratically in his chest. At this moment, he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. At least then he could avoid this conversation.

"What's that?"

Hotch looked at it and shrugged. That would've made Dean believe that he didn't know what it was or what was in there, but the look he wore told different. Hotch, maybe even the others, knew exactly who he was. Either way, he secret was out.

"Garcia faxed it to me saying to read it urgently. I skimmed through it, but," Hotch slammed it into Dean's chest, "why don't you share with everyone else what it's in there."

Dean knew damn well that wasn't a request. He knew an order when he heard it. He opened it, and the first thing he saw was an old picture of him from high school. What really gave him away was a copy of an ID with his real name on it. Everything that told of who he was was in there... including the records of his name change. Everything in there was confirmation that he was Dean Winchester.

"What's in the file, Dean?" asked JJ.

Dean looked at everyone and sighed. He knew this day was coming. Ash was right; he wasn't going to be able to run away from who he really was forever. Now that he was going to have to tell the truth, he just had to choose. Whatever he chose, no matter what, was going to have a huge impact on someone.

"Does this have something to do with Dean Winchester?" asked Morgan crossing his arms.

"My birth name isn't Dean Smith." He could feel his body shaking. He was about to say something he hasn't said in fifteen years. "My real name is... Dean Winchester." He heard several gasps.

"You mean," Rossi started, "Sam's-"

Dean nodded. "Sam's my younger brother. I haven't seen him in fifteen years."

JJ's head whipped to Sam studying him. Now that she knew, she could see the resemblance. She didn't know what to feel about this. The man she felt very close to was Sam Winchester's brother. The man she once really liked and wanted to be with was related to a psychotic murderer.

"Why didn't you tell us?" asked Reid sounding very young.

Dean snorted. "It was none of any of your business. I wanted nothing to do with my old life."

Morgan moved forward clearly angry. "Of course it's our damn business. We've been trying to find Sam's brother and you were him the whole time. How do we know you haven't been helping them? That could be the only reason Sam's been able to avoid the police all these years."

"Fuck you Morgan! I said I haven't seen him in fifteen years. That includes talking to him. All these years I have been hoping like crazy that he got away from our father. I had no fucking idea that this was what he's been doing. I'm a good cop, and you of all people should fucking know that."

"Calm down," Emily said getting in between them, but Morgan stepped around her.

Morgan and Dean were now all the more closer. "Just admit Dean. You didn't want us to know who you were because you've been helping your faggot brother and his lover this whole time!"

Dean has never had a problem with gay people. He's even been best friends with one in college who also happened to be his roommate. He stuck up for him when dicks like Morgan talked down on him. He had a rule not to fight over it, because he didn't want to risk any chances with getting into the FBI, and his friend knew and respected that. Hearing Morgan, who has been a good friend, call his brother a faggot was what broke that rule.

Regardless if Dean hasn't been trained by John in years, that didn't mean that Dean stopped training on his own. He was a very skilled fighter, which was why he was so quick to punch Morgan without him seeing what was coming. Morgan fell to the ground holding his obvious broken nose.

It took both Rossi and Hotch to pull Dean away from doing more. "Say that again, and I promise you'll get more than a broken nose."

Hotch shoved him against the wall, but before he could reprimand him his phone rang. "Yeah." There was a long pause. "You sure?" Another pause, then he hung up. He turned to the rest of the team. "Garcia told me that a baby girl in the area has in fact been missing."

Dean gasped and quickly looked to Sam who was looking away. No. Dean couldn't believe that. When Sam spoke of the baby, he was so sincere.

Hotch looked back at him clearly angry. "I don't care if Sam is your brother. You are still going to do your job. You are going to go in there and get Sam to give up that child, or I'll have you arrested for obstruction of justice."

In the end, Dean agreed, but not for threat of arrest. He knew that they were bluffing... a little. They knew very well that Sam wasn't going to speak to anyone but him or with him in the room. So, yes, Dean agreed to do his job. As he walked back into the room with Sam, Dean didn't know whose job was more important or whose he was really doing.

Dean Smith's job was to get what he needed to lock up the ones who committed terrible crimes. To make sure they paid for those crimes so they could never do it again. His job was to go in there and get Sam to admit he kidnapped the baby and tell them where she was so she can be with her family.

Dean Winchester's job was to protect Sam from anything and everything that wanted to hurt him. To make sure that Sam was taken care to the best of his abilities. His job was to go in there and tell Sam that he wanted to go with him no matter if he was delusional or not. Dean Winchester was supposed to do whatever he had to get Sam and Castiel out even if it meant breaking them out himself.

So, Dean sat there in front of Sam with Morgan. He felt his two identities fight brutally. He knew without a doubt that one was winning. Dean smirked. He had a feeling he knew which one was, and he couldn't find it in himself to wish otherwise.

* * *

 **AN: Who do you think is winning? Thoughts? Until next time. -Kauri510**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: As you read this chapter, try not to assume too early. Anyway, I'm not sure much about police terms, so sorry in advance. I was thinking about putting another flashback on Sam and Castiel, but I decided to wait for that. I really hope you guys are understanding the story. Enjoy!**

* * *

"What happened to you?" Sam asked Morgan. Dean didn't think it was a real question, because Sam was smiling as if he knew who did it. Morgan ignored him and motioned for Dean to get started.

Dean couldn't for the life of him believe that Sam and Castiel had kidnapped the baby they say is theirs. Unfortunately, they can't just take their word when they have evidence that shows that a baby girl was reported missing in the area around the time of the murder that brought them here. Dean just couldn't understand how Garcia had missed it. It wasn't like her to miss things like this.

He laid out the missing person's report in front of Sam, and waited for any reaction from Sam. All Sam did was look at it, and then at him obviously confused. "What's this?"

"Our technical analyst had found a baby girl missing around the time of the murder that brought us here. You have a baby girl in your possession that you claim is yours."

Sam didn't say anything right away. In fact, all he did was just sit there examining the report. Hotch didn't want Sam to look at it at all, but Dean had convinced them. He said that they may be able to get an honest reaction from Sam if he were to see it. So far, Sam had stuck with his claims of giving birth to the child himself, but if he were to see the report maybe Sam could let something slip.

Dean hated the fact that Morgan was even in the same room with him after what he said, but he thought it was good in some way. He figured that if Morgan was with the others, he would only talk shit about him helping Sam avoid arrest, or about Sam himself. At least if Morgan was with him, he would keep his mouth shut. If he didn't, friends or not, Dean would be more than happy to do it for him.

* * *

Castiel sat in his chair with his legs propped up on the table patiently waiting for someone to come in. He was getting bored of waiting on them. He knew that Sam was probably getting more attention, but that didn't mean they had to ignore him. He was feeling rather insulted. Sure, Sam was the one who was seen by most of the 'witnesses,' but he was still worth talking to.

He chuckled and rolled his eyes. As if he cared what they thought. If anything, he was bored of not seeing Sam. He was seriously in need of touching Sam. He swore right then and there that when everything was done and over with he was seriously going to fuck Sam like there was no tomorrow. He sighed dramatically. Castiel was stuck there imagining what that was going to be like.

Before he could even imagine the good parts, the door opened and in came in two of the agents. He looked them up and down and frowned. He wasn't really in the mood to talk anymore now that he was getting in the mood to picturing Sam writhing under him.

"What can I do for you?" Castiel said. They could hear it in his voice that he didn't really care one way or another.

"Our technical analyst-"

"Penelope Garcia," Castiel supplied.

"-has informed us of a child that had been reported missing around the time of the murder," Emily said ignoring his interruption.

Castiel looked back and forth between them clearly confused. "That's very unfortunate," he shrugged his shoulders. The only child he cares about is Deanna and any other child that he and Sam might have in the future. Other children are their parents problem.

"Therefore, we know that the child that you both claim to be yours has indeed been kidnapped. It would make your situation all the more easy if you just tell us where she is."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Castiel rose to his feet knocking the chair over. He was seriously pissed. "Neither of us kidnapped her. She is ours, and you people need to get it into your fucking heads that I will never tell you where she is!"

"Mr. Winchester sit down," ordered Reid.

Castiel turned to the doctor and was about to say something when he heard a yell that he knew all too well. His head whipped to the door, and immediately made his way around the table. The agents heard it as well, and went to block Castiel's way from leaving.

Emily stood in front of Castiel not even remotely afraid of him. She knew how to fight, but she figured that Castiel's attitude confirmed that he wouldn't hurt her. He may have killed women along with others, but nothing about his profile suggests that he would physically harm a woman for no reason.

Castiel growled and stared daggers at her. The doctor was off to the side of her. "What you profilers have yet to realize is that when it comes to Sam and my daughter," he leaned in closer voice lower, "I'm not above hitting a woman."

Emily knew right at that moment, that that part of the profile could be thrown out the window. The look in his eyes, she knew that he was telling the truth. She should've known that with his behavior, when it came to Sam, nothing was off the table.

"Castiel, sit down!" yelled Reid. He made a move to grab Castiel, but his body language made him stop.

"Don't think because you're FBI, I won't put you in your place." Castiel didn't even spare a glance to Reid. He was only staring at Emily. "Stop wasting my fucking time. I'm not telling you where my daughter is. Now if you don't want me to make you get out of my way, I suggest you to take me to Sam."

Castiel was well aware of the fact that he could be very terrifying, and he was glad for it. In no way, shape or form should people think he would be gentle because of their gender, size or physical or mental disability. It didn't matter what that person's situation was... if they got in his way of getting to Sam or Deanna, he would be more than happy to use force. A warning was all they were going to get. If they decided to ignore that, well... whatever happens after that is their problem.

Seeing the shiver run down Emily's spine, he smirked. Not moving at all, Castiel said in a low tone, "Don't make me ask twice."

* * *

"FUCK YOU!" Sam screamed. He backed away from them not trusting what he would do. He didn't come here to hurt Dean in any way, and he wasn't going to start now. His knowledge of torture and fighting would put any professional or street fighter to shame, so he wasn't going to risk it.

"Sam, calm down," Dean said putting his hands up in a calming manner.

Sam growled. "Don't tell me to fucking calm down. How dare you! When will you assholes get it into your head that she is mine? I'm not telling you where she is."

Sam turned his gaze away from them but still enough to see their actions. He had to calm down sooner rather than later. Things would only end badly if his problem got out. No way would Dean, truth or not, would ever come with him. He wanted to explain it to him when -hopefully- he came with them. He shut his eyes willing it to go away.

Morgan none too kindly pushed Dean out of the way. "Listen you punk. We know damn well that you two fags kidnapped that child. Not only are you killing people, but you're taking an innocent child away from her family."

Dean caught himself before he tripped. His jaw dropped at what he just heard. Did he not learn to watch what he called Sam? Did he enjoy that punch so much that he would insult Sam right in front of him?

Sam whipped his head around to face the man that not only was too rough with him when he came in, but just insulted his husband. Regardless if he didn't care what people called him, Castiel was still insulted. That was not tolerated whatsoever.

Ever since he came back from Hell, he had been fighting against what he learned and what it did to him. He remembered the feeling and rush it gave him. He was by far the best down there; far better than the one who taught him. Sam didn't like what it did to him and what it made him when he came topside, and he swore he would never give into it.

Many times it was so easy to give in to it. Many times he almost did, but Castiel was always there. Castiel was the one who always brought him back down. He was the one that reminded him that it wasn't who he was. Sadly for Dean, Castiel wasn't there.

Sam made a move to Morgan, when out of nowhere, Morgan was pulled back by the collar of his shirt and shoved against the wall. Sam's eyes widened when he saw that it was Dean.

Dean didn't care that his team or other officers would come in and take him out. He didn't care, because he saw that Morgan was going to attack Sam to scare the truth out of him. He may get frustrated with their suspects when they didn't tell the truth, but never in his career did he ever resort to violence to get it.

He shoved Morgan against the wall, and stared him straight in the eye. "I may be a cop, but that's still my brother. You make a move to harm him in any way again... you insult him in any way," Dean was disappointed that Morgan was too slow to get him off; he was itching for a good fight, "you and me are going to have a problem."

Dean backed away from Morgan right as the door was thrown open and in came in Hotch and Rossi. He ignored them both still staring at Morgan.

"Friend or not, don't forget that Sam and I are related." He left it at that for Morgan to figure out what that meant.

* * *

Castiel was pacing back and forth waiting for those idiots to come back. He needed to get to Sam. He always knew when Sam's anger was getting the best of him. He had a feeling that Dean was in that room with Sam, and he just knew that Sam would never forgive himself if Dean was hurt.

"Fuck this," Castiel said under his breath. He went to the door and turned the knob. He expected it to be locked but it opened. He rolled his eyes at the stupidity of the police. He looked down the hall and can hear all the more clear that Sam was indeed yelling.

He walked out like he owned the place and into Sam's room. He could see Sam shaking clutching his eyes shut. Dean was yelling at that dick Morgan who Castiel was very tempted at killing. And Hotch and Rossi ordering Dean to get out. He ignored all of that, and pushed aside the two older agents out of his way and went straight to Sam.

"How the hell did you get out?" demanded Hotch.

Castiel ignored him, and pulled Sam into an embrace. He whispered, "Calm down, baby. You're not in Hell anymore. I got you out."

Sam's body was calming down. "I know. I'm out. You saved me." He opened his eyes and only saw Castiel's beautiful blue eyes. "You saved me," he repeated.

"That's right, and I'd do it again." Castiel kissed Sam's forehead. "You have to calm down. Don't let Dean see you this way."

It took some time, but eventually Sam did calm down enough for his anger to no longer be a problem. He looked to Dean getting angry with Hotch at what he's being told. Sam didn't like the fact that Dean was being reprimanded and Morgan wasn't. It was just another thing on his list to worry about.

* * *

Dean was asked to leave, but he stayed long enough to see that none of the others forced Castiel to go back. They could see that Sam was in need of him, and if it meant that he wouldn't throw anymore fits, they would allow them to be together. It's not like they were going anywhere.

Dean crossed his arms and stared at the interaction between Sam and Castiel. He wanted to be in there with them, but he needed to do his job.

"Dean!" Hotch yelled. "Another outburst like that and I'm sending you back to Washington."

Dean rolled his eyes. "What the hell did you expect to happen? You send me in there with him," Dean made a disgusted gesture to Morgan. "Sam and I may be on opposite sides of the law, but don't ignore that he's still my brother."

Rossi went to open his mouth to speak, but he was cut off when Dean's phone rang. Dean groaned, and fished out his phone. He looked at the caller ID, but didn't recognize the number. He furrowed his brows.

"Hello?" Dean said when he hit answer.

 _"Ask Sam and Castiel if they've ever been to Dee's Paradise?"_

"What-"

Dean was cut off when whoever it was hung up. He stared at the phone as if the answer would suddenly pop up. He looked back at the window to his brother and Castiel. Before anyone could ask who it was, Dean walked out and went straight next door. He opened the door, and walked in. He stared at his brother not knowing what to say.

"Dean?" Sam stood up slowly, "What's wrong?"

"I just got a call," Dean said as if that would explain why he was in there.

"Okay?" Sam looked down at Castiel who shrugged his shoulders. "Who was it? What did they want?"

"Have either of you been to Dee's Paradise?" Dean received two gasps in answer. Sam and Castiel obviously understood. "What does that mean?"

"What?" Dean said louder. Nothing.

All traces of shock was wiped from their faces. Sam and Castiel just stared at him with blank expressions. He didn't know what was going on, but he could just feel that something was wrong. Even though Sam and Castiel's faces showed nothing, he knew it was anything but.

Sam slowly sat down not looking away from him. Castiel turned away from him and leaned in to kiss Sam. On instinct, Sam turned his head to received the kiss from him. If Dean wasn't looking, he would've missed Castiel whispering something in Sam's ear.

"What does that mean?" Dean was seeing that he wouldn't get anything from them once again, so he made his way back to the door. He needed to gather his thoughts.

"Dean," Castiel said when he had his back to them. He turned around. Castiel didn't look at him, but continued to stare at the window. "Neither Sam nor I will be speaking to any of you anymore. So either lock us up," Castiel turned his gaze to Dean and locked eyes with him, "or let us go."

* * *

Dean stood there watching his brother sit quietly next to Castiel. Even though they were alone, they didn't speak to each other. He knew whatever that phrase meant, it wasn't good. The questions that needed to be answered was who was the man on the phone, and why did he sound familiar?

Dean ignored everything around him for the moment. He decided a long time ago who he was. Dean knew his place, and he was perfectly fine with it. The brutal battle between who he was and who he was meant to be was long over. One stood victoriously over the other. Dean was well aware of the consequences of who won, but he no longer cared. He was who he was, and not anyone, not Sam, not his team, not even himself could change it.

"Dean! Pay attention," ordered Rossi.

Dean went to open his mouth, but just as he went to do so, every light in the room went out. They looked around and saw that the lights in Sam and Castiel's rooms went out as well. Dean brought out his flashlight that he learned to always keep on him and shined it around.

"Everyone okay?" he asked. Everyone confirmed no one was hurt.

The rest of the BAU took out there lights and shined it around. Reid stopped and shined it on the window to Sam's room. "Guys?"

They all followed his gaze and each of their jaws dropped at what they saw. Dean stepped closer to the window and shined his light inside. It was empty. As soon as he shined it around, and confirmed it was indeed empty, he was the first one to run out. His team on his tail.

Reid, Emily and JJ went to the other police officers and saw that the lights everywhere went out. Dean assumed that the lights in the whole building were probably out.

Testing the door, Dean saw that it was locked from the outside. He furrowed his brows wondering how the hell they got out. He opened it and shined his light around, and as soon as they were all in the lights went back on.

"Where the hell did they go?" demanded Hotch.

Dean rolled his eyes. Wasn't that a stupid fucking question. He seriously hated it when people asked dumb questions they knew that no one else would know.

Hotch snapped to Dean, "Did you have something to do with this?"

"How the fuck would I have had anything to do with this?" He snapped back. "You all are raising your voices at me one too many times. I was in the room with all of you assholes. How the hell would I have been able to shut the power off in the whole damn building and break them out and be back in the room all in the matter of seconds? I'm good, but not that fucking good!"

Dean huffed and made his way to the front. He had to check something. If he was going to find Sam and Castiel, he needed to check a couple of things. He pulled out one of their laptops and pulled out the file containing the video of Sam and Castiel's latest hunt. He fast forward it just before they shot the girl and froze it on the man holding Sam's baby. He couldn't see the man's face clearly, but he stared at him anyway.

While Dean went about the video, the local police and his team were running around trying to figure out how Sam and Castiel escaped. He heard that the video cameras didn't show anything of use. All it showed was that Sam and Castiel were sitting together one minute, then the lights went out, and when they came back on they were gone.

Dean played the recording of the call that he got from the unknown number. He had an app on his phone that recorded incoming calls. He replayed it several times trying to figure out why it sounded so familiar. He looked back at the video and could swear that he had seen the man before.

* * *

Hotch had gathered his team over and they watched the video that had been recording Sam's room. It showed nothing that could tell them how they escaped.

"Dammit. Okay, they're gone. We know that, and this isn't going to help us." He turned his back on the footage. He rubbed his chin in thought. "JJ, we need to let the public know that Sam and Castiel have escaped." JJ nodded. "You know what to tell them." He looked around. "Where's Dean?"

Reid spoke up, "He was in the front going through the videos of Sam and Castiel. I heard him replaying the call that he received."

Hotch nodded. "Go get him. We all need to go over what we're going to do."

Reid nodded and went off to fetch Dean. As Hotch spoke to his team and some of the other police officers about what they can do about finding Sam and Castiel, Reid came rushing back.

"Dean's gone."

There was silence amongst the BAU. "What?"

"I went out there, and an officer said that he had rushed out and took one of the SUVs."

"Okay, put an APB on the car and have Garcia track his phone." Before any of them could make a move, he continued, "We can assume one of two things have happened. Either Dean knows where they are and wants to bring his brother in himself or," Hotch crossed his arms praying that he was wrong, "Dean has joined up with Sam and Castiel."

* * *

 **AN: Which one do you think is true? Or do you think there's a third option? Thoughts? I hope you liked it. Don't disregard anything or deem it unimportant yet. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Have you ever thought why Castiel saved Sam from Hell? Have you ever thought what he was doing before he saved him? Now that you have, let's find out. The first half will tell you how and why Sam was the one he fell in love with.**

* * *

 _ **Then:**_

Castiel had been coming and going from earth for over twenty years. He didn't know why this one human had piqued his interest, but Castiel couldn't deny him anymore. He had given his brothers excuses left and right to come to visit his human. Then there were times when Castiel didn't even bother with an excuse.

Castiel wasn't meant to take such a huge interest in the human race. He found out a long time ago, that he wasn't like the rest of his family. He was curious. He had doubts, and he had questions.

Castiel had returned to his home for almost a year in human terms, and he had been craving to see his human again. He had been on his way to see his human again when he overheard several of his older brothers talking. Normally he would ignore them, but at the mention of his human's last name, Castiel stopped.

"When did he go?" asked his older brother Raphael.

"Two nights ago," answered Michael.

"Oh well. I'm not surprised. Those damn Winchesters always have to be so willing to throw themselves in the fire. If Samuel wanted to throw himself away and follow in his daddy's footsteps, then it's not our problem anymore."

Michael scoffed and crossed his arms. "Of course it's our problem. We're going to need him, just like we're going to need his brother."

Castiel gasped. Sam went to Hell! He looked down as if he could see him from his position. Although he was an angel, he wanted to cry. Castiel had been so willing to spend whatever time he had to be with him, that it was as if he was dying knowing that Sam was in Hell.

Castiel had taken several vessels in his time visiting his human, but eventually he had settled on a man who was having difficulties with his family. Despite his issues with his family, he had great faith in angels, Heaven and God. Castiel saw him for what and who he was. Castiel had come to him and asked if he would say yes to him. Jimmy had asked for protection for his wife and daughter, and when Castiel agreed, everything was set.

* * *

Castiel had always felt something for Sam Winchester even while he was in the womb. Back then, Castiel didn't feel anything romantic, but just simply wanting to protect him. He wasn't Sam's personal guardian, which would've made him extremely happy. After so much time visiting Sam, Castiel had spoken with the angel. The angel was stunned to think there was another angel out there that wanted to protect Sam; it didn't take long for the angel to give up his post.

Castiel had taken the role as Sam Winchester's protector, and he couldn't regret what he did. The moment he saw Sam being born, Castiel knew without a doubt that he was his. He could see it written on his soul that he would be destined for great things, and unfortunately some terrible things as well.

He was in a state of surprise that many of the Heavenly Host, guardian angels included, was disgusted with Sam's situation concerning the demon that had killed his mother. For some reason, Castiel couldn't find it in himself to be anything but okay with it. He didn't understand why the other angels would be disgusted with Sam. He couldn't think of a reason why his brothers and sisters thought that Sam had asked for it when he was only six months old.

Ever since Castiel took up his role, he had been spending all the more time protecting him. Everything was going well, until Michael came to him. He had fought against the older angel for his role, but not surprising that Castiel lost that fight. Michael had demanded that Castiel go back to what he was doing before, and to step aside for Sam's original guardian. Castiel refused.

He had been beaten severely by Michael and even Raphael. They hated the Winchesters, and they made no effort to hide that fact. Castiel fought back as hard as he could, but he was no match for them.

"Sam Winchester is mine!" He screamed at them. He was hurt, and he knew Jimmy was as well. He was grateful that despite the agonizing pain, Jimmy didn't cast him out. Jimmy was well aware of his human feelings for Sam, and that made him fight back the want to cast Castiel out.

"He's a filthy human. Sam Winchester is an abomination. He was damned from the moment he was born!" Michael yelled hitting him once again.

Castiel shook his head refusing to believe that. "He is Father's creation. Father made him regardless of the deal that Mary made. If he is the abomination that you claim he is, then blame Father for allowing him to be born!" Castiel struck against Michael again. It did little to no damage.

Their fight went on like that for so long. Castiel would defend Sam for years, and because of that Castiel couldn't be with Sam as much as he should've when he was growing up. Castiel is sad to say that he had spent so much time defending him then protecting him.

Castiel would leave to be with Sam as much as he could, but he would be forced to do his orignal work as well. The archangels had come to the agreement that Castiel would continue his role with Sam, but he would still have to do the work as a normal soldier. Castiel agreed with no hesitance damn all the stress and consequences. So, that's what Castiel did. He would protect Sam as much as he could, then leave to do his job. Even though it wasn't what he wanted, he knew it was the best he was going to get. Since Michael and the others were much more powerful then he was, he couldn't argue even if he wanted to.

So, here he was. Listening to Michael and Raphael discuss Sam being in Hell. By the sound of it, they were going to leave him down there as punishment. Castiel knew of their plan to end the world, and he knew even more that they would need both brothers for that. Now because of Sam's deal, no angel could locate Dean Winchester.

* * *

Castiel didn't hesitate to make his move. There was no human word that could describe what Hell was like, and Castiel wasn't going to either. Whenever an angel took up a vessel, the human would be locked in their own body. They were hardly ever aware of what was going on, but many of the angels, even Castiel, have learned that he wasn't like the others. Castiel had often gone to Jimmy for advice, and because of the loyalty he had given, Castiel took it upon himself to warn him.

Hell wasn't a place the angels went to very often. They considered themselves above those who were suffering in Hell. Castiel braced himself for one hell of a journey. It shouldn't be that hard to find Sam, but that would only be the case if his older brothers told him of Sam's specific location. Now that he was alone, Sam would be that much harder to locate. Castiel shook his head. He didn't care about the length he would have to go through to get to him, as long he got to Sam.

Evenutally after so long of searching, he found his way to Sam. What he saw broke his heart. Jimmy had already discussed it with him that whatever he was feeling wasn't Jimmy, but all him. That had alleviated much of Castiel's worries. He didn't want to feel this way for Sam if it meant that it was never his feelings.

Sam was torturing so many broken souls. Castiel was very ashamed of himself, because this was all his fault. If he had done his duty of protecting Sam, then he wouldn't be here saving him. As Castiel was making his way to Sam he saw two things. One, Sam was loving what he was doing, and two Sam was more broken than the souls he tortured. He looked closer and he could see the shame and hurt behind the sinister look in his eyes, and that was what convinced Castiel that Sam was still in there.

Many of Hell's damned cowered in fear, but not Sam. He just looked at him, and Castiel took that moment to reach out to Sam.

"Samuel Winchester, would you like to be saved?" Castiel had learned from both Jimmy and other humans that it wasn't right to do something against a person's will no matter what.

Sam just stood over a poor soul, and looked away. He looked down at what he was doing, and quickly his shame was visible to everyone. He shook his head and backed away. Castiel was saddened for that, but Jimmy spoke through.

 _"He doesn't feel worthy enough to be saved."_

That convinced Castiel not to leave, not that he believed he would be able to anyway. He stuck out his hand to the one he loved with all that he was.

"Come with me, Sam. You do not belong here." Sam looked up at him, and moved hesitantly to him. That encouraged him to continue. "I won't leave here without you. Please, come with me. I promise that you have my word that I will save you."

Sam slowly took his hand, and in a shot of light... they were gone. It was much easier for him to leave then to come. He held onto Sam like his life depended on it. In many ways, it did. He had not only Hell on his tail for taking Sam, but also his brothers for getting him. Looking at the damaged soul in his arms, he couldn't find it in himself to care.

"What are you?" Sam asked softly still holding onto him.

Castiel looked down at him and saw that he was scared of their surroundings. "I'm an angel."

Sam leaned his head onto Castiel, "My angel."

* * *

...

" _Christo_."

Castiel shook his head, "I'm not a demon." Sam scoffed and crossed his arms. "You have already thought me of no threat. If you really thought I was a demon or anything else dangerous, you wouldn't have relaxed when you first saw me. Am I right?"

Sam slowly uncrossed his arms. "How- Who are you?"

"Look me in the eyes," Castiel gently ordered, "and tell me who I am."

Sam stared at him, and quickly his eyes widened. "You're the angel that saved me. Why?" Sam's eyes began to glisten. He remembered the sight of the beautiful light that came to him in his worst moment. He fell in love with that light and whoever it was behind it. He backed away not feeling worthy.

"I didn't know what it was called before, but now I do. I've been in love with you for a very long time." Castiel moved closer to Sam, "You have been mine since the minute you were born. I promise you right here and now, that I will protect and love you for as long as you will have me."

"But, you can't." A tear slipped down Sam's face. "I have demon blood in me. I tortured thousands of souls. I'm a-"

Castiel cut him off, "I don't care. I love you with all that I am. You are mine, and if one day you can love me, I will be yours. Even if you could never love me, I _am_ yours." Castiel reached out and touched Sam's chest feeling his heart. "My heart beats with yours, and if I have anything to say about it, it will for the rest of our days."

Castiel looked up to Sam, and saw the shame, confusion and hurt. Castiel vowed that he would do whatever or however long it took to change that.

* * *

 _ **Now:**_

Dean knew as soon as he took off that the BAU was going to track him, but at the time he couldn't find it in himself to care. All he was thinking about at the time was finding Sam. He didn't know why the truth mattered so much when just at the start of this all he didn't believe in any of it.

He had shut off his phone so Garcia couldn't track it. As for the car, he couldn't do much about it. Dean would just have to hope that it would take time for the police to find him. He sighed. He could just see the shit storm that was coming once he got to Sam.

It had taken some time for Dean to realize who and where Sam and Castiel were going to. He had watched the clip and listened to the recording together a few times, and that's when it clicked. Dean had wanted to kick himself for not seeing it sooner. They were in South Dakota, and there was only one person in the state that Dean knew Sam trusted.

Which was why Dean was now standing in front of Singer Salvage. He had parked the SUV a couple blocks over in case he was found. At least this way, he would have more time. As for what... he didn't know yet.

Dean pulled out his gun at the ready. Any time he was on the job and in an area that he didn't recognize he would have his gun ready. In this case with his brother, he needed it out in case something came out that wasn't friendly.

He walked down the yard, and stopped in his tracks when he saw the Impala. He lowered his gun and went up to her. Dean lightly touched her, and felt instantly better. He found himself wanting so badly to drive her at least once more before this day ended. The last time he saw her, he thought she would be the only girl in his life. He missed how things were so simple.

Dean was broken out of his thoughts when he heard yelling and gunshots. He automatically went into FBI mode, and readied his gun. Right now, he was Dean Smith, FBI agent.

* * *

When Sam heard Dean tell him about the call, he regretfully knew they would have to leave. He was hoping to have convinced Dean to come with him to at least hear him out, but sadly things change. Castiel had whispered in his ear that they would leave in two minutes after Dean left the room. Castiel was aware that a tiny part of Sam didn't want to leave without something, but them leaving was more important.

When they got to Bobby's, Sam saw that Deanna was lying on her baby blanket in a circle of salt. Bobby was standing over her with a shotgun.

"What's wrong? What happened?" Castiel demanded. Sam could hear it in his voice that he was in full angel mode.

Bobby sighed in relief at the sight of them. "My traps went off about a mile off. I got the bastard, but not before he said there were more coming."

"What was it?" Sam asked.

Bobby shook his head in disbelief, "You're not going to believe this. There were two. A demon, and-"

Castiel turned back to him slowly when he didn't finish. "And the other?"

"An angel."

Sam's jaw dropped. "What?!" He bent over to pick up Deanna. He kissed her, and he recieved a giggle in return which made the situation not as bad as it actually was. "Since when are angels and demons working together?"

Bobby scoffed while putting extra bullets in pocket. "Wouldn't be the first time would it?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "That situation was different and you know it."

Castiel opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off when they all heard wings outside. He had showed Bobby how to ward off angels from getting inside the house with the expection of him, which was a huge relief to all of them. At least then if Bobby heard wings he would know it was him.

Sam gently kissed Deanna on her cheek and put her down. He surrouded her with pillows and made sure nothing around her would harm her. Castiel saw what he was doing, and touched his arm. Sam stopped doing what he was doing instantly.

"Sam, I need you to stay here."

"No!" Sam turned around and faced him. "They're here for us."

"Which is why I can't let you come out. I need you safe in here with Deanna. I can't watch you and fight for you at the same time."

Sam loved Castiel so much, but sometimes he wished he wasn't so protective. "I love you, I do, but I'm not letting you go out there by yourself. You're my husband; it's me and you against the world. You know damn well that I'm not going to sit here while you fight."

"I understand that, but if something were to happen, who's going to take care of Deanna? If something happens to me, then at least she'll have you. Please stay."

"If something happens to you, what will that do to me? If something were to happen, then you know for a fact that Bobby would take care of her. I love her, but I also love you. If you're going down, then I'm going to be there with you." Sam pulled out his shotgun that he had made specially with bullets made from an angel blade.

Castiel watched as he made his way to the front door and stopped. He bent down to kiss Deanna, hopefully not goodbye. He looked down at her, and swore that by the end of this day that anyone out there who wanted to hurt his family won't make it out. He made his way to Sam and readied his angel blade. If they were to die from this fight, at least Deanna would finally be safe.

"Besides," Sam continued, opening the door, "if we do die today, we sure as hell are taking them with us."

Castiel smirked and walked outside seeing eight of his brothers, and five demons. Thirteen against an angel, and two hunters. Sounds about right. As Castiel looked amongst his brothers, he was sad to see that Gabriel was among them along with Raphael.

"Gabriel, what are you doing?" Castiel asked in disappointment.

Gabriel stood up like a soldier. "What I'm told to."

"You need to come to your senses Castiel," stated Raphael. "You won't make it out of here alive if you don't come with us."

"You honestly think I believe that? I come with you, and you kill me. I may be younger than you, but I'm not stupid."

"You would seriously choose this abomination and beast of a child over your family?" Raphael gestured to Sam.

Castiel growled. "Sam is not an abomination, and don't you dare talk about my daughter like that! You and the others stopped being my family the moment you all decided to leave him down in the pit. Besides," he smirked, "Michael's dead, isn't he?"

"Sam is an abomination and you know it. He's a-" Raphael stopped when he found the angel next to him falling to the ground with an angel blade in his chest.

"Call him that again, and you're going to wish you never came here."

That was the last thing that was spoken before the fight broke out. Castiel, Sam and Bobby fought as best they could. Castiel ordered Sam and Bobby to take care of the demons, while he dealt with the angels. Regardless if two of the angels were archangels, Castiel wasn't the same weak angel he was when they last fought. Two went down fairly easy.

Sam had just stabbed two demons in the chest when his gun was knocked out of his hands. He was shoved to the ground with a demon's weight on top of him. He could see Bobby was knocked across the ground hitting his head on a nearby car.

He could feel the breath of the demon against his ear. "Come back with us Sammy." The demon licked his ear seductively, "We all miss you. I know I do."

Sam tried to knock him off, but he was still hurt from the last demon. No matter how skilled he, Castiel and Bobby were, this many demons and angels was still difficult to do on their own. This was around the time that he wished that his dad was here, or maybe Dean if he knew how to kill them.

The demon grabbed the back of his hair and slammed his face against the ground. He hissed from the pain. Sam tried to reach out to the knife in front of him, but he was slammed against the ground again. In the corner of his vision, he could see three of the angels dead, but Castiel was still having a hard time with the remaining. Sam needed to get to Castiel. What they needed was help.

Sam tried again to get to the knife, but he was seeing black all over. He refused to go under. Castiel needed him, and so did Bobby. He struggled to get the weight of the demon off him, but he was in so much pain from his leg. He was fighting back as hard as he could, but out of nowhere the weight of the demon was lifted... or more like thrown. He figured that Bobby got him off, and he promised to thank him when this was all done and over with.

Sam lifted his gaze about to thank Bobby when his voice got caught in his throat, and his eyes widened at the sight. Never did Sam ever think he would be seeing what he was.

* * *

Dean ran to where he knew Bobby's house was, and when the house was in sight he could see a bloody fight. There were several bodies on the ground that Dean knew were dead. Castiel was fighting three men. Bobby was dealing with two, while Sam was being pinned to the ground by a man.

Seeing his brother getting hurt pushed him away from FBI agent to big brother. When he saw his brother hurt, something happened. It was like a light switch, and when it flipped Dean's body reacted on instinct. Dean didn't have time to think about it, he just dropped his gun finding it useless.

Dean saw a knife in front of Sam, and grabbed it. The man on top of Sam was to busy whispering something to him to have noticed Dean. He didn't know what he was doing, but it was like his body was moving on its own. With the knife in hand, he stabbed the man in the back. His brain didn't register the orange flickering light in his body. He threw the man off of his brother.

He didn't bother with Sam, because right away his attention snapped to Bobby. He went to the men attacking him. Dean had to give the man credit. For an old man he was handling himself quite well. Just when Dean stabbed another man and went down, Bobby was able to recover and fight back. Dean left him alone thinking himself no longer of use.

"Dean!"

Dean's attention whipped to Sam still on the ground. He saw Sam pointing at something.

"The gun! Help Castiel."

Dean didn't move. He didn't know why, but he was starting to come down from wherever he went to. He was starting to realize what he had just done. He looked down at the bloody knife in his hands, and they began to shake. He had just killed people. That went against everything he stood for. Dean didn't even announce himself to those people like he was supposed to.

"Dean! Please, help him!"

Dean's head snapped up and he could see Castiel struggling against three men. When his two identities fought against each other, one had won. He was thrilled with the result, but now he was fighting against the victor. Dean shook his head. Castiel was on the verge of losing.

"PLEASE!" Sam yelled. Sam turned away from Dean thinking he wasn't going to help anymore. He didn't have time to think about why Dean helped at all. He began to crawl to the gun after failing to stand up.

Right before Sam could grab the gun, it was suddenly taken and picked up. He looked up and saw his brother. Dean grabbed the shotgun and went after the men beating Castiel.

"HEY!" A white man turned away from Castiel, and looked at him. Without realizing that he wasn't supposed to do it, Dean pulled the trigger. The man lifted his head and screamed. A flash of white light burst from the man, and he fell to the ground dead. Dean didn't wait to think about what that was.

* * *

Sam was able to finally get to his feet. He stared in shock at the sight of his brother helping them. He didn't understand what the hell was happening. He didn't know why Dean was helping them at all when not too long ago Dean was all FBI agent.

Seeing his brother in action after fifteen years was a wonderful sight. Sam hoped beyond hope that Dean was back to normal. Sam frowned. What was normal when Dean stopped being a hunter at eighteen? When he was eighteen, Dean didn't know that demons could be killed. So, was that Dean Winchester, or Dean Smith?

At the sight of the angel being killed, Raphael and Gabriel stopped but kept up their hold on Castiel. As for Castiel himself, he was too weak to get away from them. Raphael tilt his head looking Dean over.

"Who are you?" he asked in slight disgust.

Dean held the shotgun at gunpoint. He narrowed his eyes. "Let him go."

Raphael smirked, and tightened his grip on Castiel making him hiss in pain. "Why would I do that?"

Dean growled. "If you don't want to end up like your friend, you'll let him go." He cocked the gun when they didn't move. "Now."

 _"Dean, you have to kill them!"_ Dean heard Sam yell from behind him. _"They'll keep coming back."_

Raphael chuckled. "So, you're Dean? I've been waiting a very long time to meet you."

"Can't say the same."

 _"Please, Dean, shoot him."_

Raphael shook his head in amusement. "You're not going to shoot me. So put it down and walk away."

Dean didn't pull the trigger, but he didn't put the gun down either. Dean was strugggling against the need to do this. He wasn't a killer. He didn't want to be. Dean slowly brought down the gun which earned a smirk from the black man hurting Castiel. Dean was already a killer. He just killed three people. He may be FBI, he slowly brought it back up, but he was a Winchester all the way.

 _"Dean, please trust me,"_ Sam begged.

Hearing Sam beg Dean to trust him was what made Dean point the gun at the black man's chest and pull the trigger. The same white light burst from him as it did the other. Dean went to point it at the last man, but stopped when he released Castiel. Immediately, the last man helped Castiel to his feet and touched his forehead.

"Are you okay little brother?" Gabriel said softly.

Castiel sighed in relief. "I'm fine. I know you were only doing your part, but you didn't have to take it so seriously."

Gabriel chuckled. "I had to make it look convincing." With a pat on the back and a wave to Sam and Bobby, he was gone.

Castiel didn't take the time to thank Dean, because as soon as he saw that Sam was hurt he rushed over. Dean ignored them, and only stared at the bodies in front of him. He killed four people today. He bowed his head, shutting his eyes fighting back the tears.

He swore when he left Sam and John all those years ago that he would never be like them, yet here he was. He had more blood on his hands. Dean gripped the gun in his hands tight. He didn't want to be a murderer. He wanted to help people. That was the whole reason he joined the FBI. A tear slipped down his face.

"Dean?"

Dean flinched at the soft sound of his brother's voice.

"Are you okay?"

Dean slowly turned around and opened his eyes. Sam's eyes softened at the broken look on Dean's face. "I'm pretty fucking far from okay!" Dean didn't know what he was doing when he lifted the gun at Sam.

Sam lifted his hands up in surrender and took a step back. He didn't believe for a moment that Dean would pull the trigger, but he wasn't going to risk getting shot either.

"Tell me what the fuck is going on!"

* * *

Castiel reacted on instinct when he saw Dean point the gun at Sam. He made his way closer to Sam to protect him, but Sam made a gesture with his hands to stop. Castiel relunctantly did as he was told. He trusted Sam to know what he was doing.

Sam made Castiel wait. He didn't need an angel to get in the way of a man with conflicting emotions at the moment. Sam had a feeling that Dean was struggling with what he knows with what he believes.

"Dean, you saved us. You stopped angels and demons from hurting my family."

"Why did they want to kill you?"

"Because of who we are and what we did. Look it's hard to explain, but Castiel is an angel and he betrayed the others in Heaven for me. He helped me stop the apocolypse that they wanted to start. They all wanted Deanna, because of what she is and the fact that she's ours. They wanted to kill me because I wouldn't give up where you were."

"Why did they want to know where I was?" Dean's hands were shaking so bad, he had to tighten his grip on the gun to stop it from falling.

"Because you played an important role in the end of world. They needed to find you to get you you to yes to being Michael's vessel."

Dean was struggling with what Sam was telling him. None of what Sam was saying was making any sense. Why couldn't Sam say it in a way that he would understand? Why did Sam have to do all of this? Why couldn't he just be...

"Dean, I'm sorry." Sam stepped closer seeing that Dean's finger was nowhere near the trigger and that it was slowly being lowered.

Dean dropped the gun, and felt the anger draining.

"Thank you, Dean for saving Castiel." Sam chuckled. "We would've been screwed if you hadn't done what you did."

Dean's eyes snapped open, and his eyes narrowed in anger. He pulled back quickly, and swung at Sam. Sam didn't see it coming, and when Dean landed a punch he went down. He stared up at Dean in shock. Not from the punch, but at the sudden anger on Dean's face.

"What I did," Dean said in a low angry tone, "was kill four fucking people."

* * *

 **AN: Do you guys get why Dean punched Sam? Do you guys know why Dean did what he did? Thoughts? I hope you liked it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: As you read this, remember that Dean is having difficulties with his natural instincts to the instincts that he learned after he left. So keep that in mind as you read. Also, Castiel had to use a lot of will power to do what he did.** **Enjoy!**

* * *

Dean was breathing heavily staring down at Sam. He needed to get control of himself, but he couldn't. He was surrounded by people that didn't deserve to die. He understood that it needed to be done because Sam was in trouble, but it still didn't change anything.

Sam didn't remember his brother to ever get aggressive towards him, but what can he say when they don't really know each other. Up until Dean left, he had looked up to him. For as long as he could remember, Sam had studied Dean trying so much to be like him. Dean didn't know it, but he was Sam's hero. Usually a son's hero was their father, but not Sam. Dean had that role, even if Dean didn't know it.

He slowly rose to his trying not to set his brother off again, but it didn't matter.

"I killed four fucking people, Sam!" Dean was about to swing at Sam again, but fought back the urge. Despite his anger at him, Dean didn't want to hurt Sam. If anything that was the last thing he wanted to do. That one punch was the only one that he promised he would do.

Sam shook his head sadly. "I'm sorry, but they were not people. They were just angels and demons who wanted to hurt my family. You would've done the exact same thing if it was your family."

A flash of red covered Dean's vision. "How dare you! How dare you act like it's not a big fucking deal that these people are dead, Sam... because of me." Dean's eyes began to water. He turned his back on Sam. He didn't want to appear weak, but he was afraid that's what he was.

"Do you not realize that what I did went against everything I stand for? I don't want to be a murderer."

"Dean, wake up! They were not people. They were all going to kill me and Castiel if you hadn't shown up. Bobby would've died as well, and then what? What would've happened to my daughter if you hadn't shown up? They would've killed her without a care in the world."

Dean was shaking his head not wanting to listen. So what if that was true? "They were people, and besides even if I did kill a couple of angels and demons, I still remember what John taught us. I remember that more often than not that demons take a living host. Living! That means there was someone inside! Angels probably do the same thing."

* * *

Castiel had turned to Bobby and asked if he was alright. Usually he didn't care one way or another about him, but the man did risk his life to helping them. He heard the punch, but assumed it was Sam doing the punching. He figured that Dean deserved it, but it wasn't until the yelling started that he turned to look at them. Castiel studied Dean's face, but saw no trace of a punch. It was then that he realized that Sam was the one that was hurt. Castiel could feel his wings expanding in anger. Dean Winchester dared to hurt what was his! He moved away from Bobby, and made his way to Sam and Dean.

Sam watched as his brother poured out his emotions. In no way, shape or form did Sam think that what Dean did wasn't a big deal, but he couldn't fight the relief that came with their deaths. Hopefully, Sam and his family could finally be left alone now.

Sam was about to open his mouth to speak, but he saw Castiel making his way over to them, and that's exactly what he didn't need. He held out his hand. "Cas, stay back!"

"Sam-" Castiel couldn't just stand there and watch as Dean hurt Sam. Brother or not, Sam was still his to protect.

"Please, stay back. This is between me and Dean. Trust me." Sam never looked away from Dean's gaze as he spoke to Castiel. In a way, his words were more for Dean than for Castiel.

"I don't care who you are, Dean, you hurt him any more than you have already, Sam won't be able to stop me from beating your ass."

Dean turned to face the angel and rolled his eyes, "Just go take your feathered ass inside. This is between me and my brother."

Castiel cursed, but went inside the house to check on Deanna. In no way, did he go inside because Dean told him to. If he stayed, he wouldn't be able to stop himself from ignoring Sam's pleas. He knew Sam was right, but that didn't mean he liked it. Bobby decided to stay behind to keep an eye on them to make sure they didn't kill each other.

Sam hated to see his brother so lost and broken. Dean was the one who walked away to get his own life. He was the one who went after what he wanted. He was the one who _became_ what he wanted. It's not right to see Dean the way he was. Sam was the one who went to Hell, and tortured and was tortured. He was the one who hunted monsters on a daily basis. He was the one who corrupted an angel, yet Dean was the most broken.

Sam didn't know what he would expect once Dean knew the truth. He didn't know what it was like to have an older brother anymore. He didn't know what Dean was like without the influence of the past, but Sam didn't care. He wanted his brother to know who he was, and to be okay with it. He meant what he said. If Dean wanted to stay with the FBI and stick to 'normal,' then Sam would give that to him. If it's what Dean wanted, Sam would stay away.

Throughout this whole need for Dean, Sam was selfish. He wanted his brother back so badly that he would risk Dean's emotional state. He would rather risk breaking Dean more than ever if it meant that Dean would know the truth. Sam scoffed. The truth. Sam should've stayed away when he had the chance. He should've stayed away regardless if he was told to look for Dean by a very important person.

* * *

"You're a monster, Sam!" Dean yelled at him; tears falling down. "I don't want to be like you or John."

Sam's heart skipped a beat. Sam never really talked about it that much with Castiel or himself, but they both knew that Sam had a slight fear that what he was doing in Hell made him more disgusting and low than a murderer. What he did made him a monster. Sam's sad expression turned to rage. He fought back for years against the voices that told him he was a monster. He wasn't going to lay there and hear it from his brother. No matter who Dean was he wasn't going to take it from him.

"Don't you ever call me a monster again. I do what I do because it's who I am. We help people... more than you and your team will ever do in your whole career."

Dean didn't want to hear anything from Sam at the moment. He was too angry and hurt at what he did. All he wanted when he came here was to know the truth. He wanted to sit down with Sam and talk. It didn't matter that they were on opposite sides of the law. Sam was still his little brother, and that made Dean want to know who the fourteen year old boy that he used to know grew up to be.

Dean clenched his fists tight to the point of pain as he stared down his brother. He was not going to hurt Sam, and it wasn't because of Castiel. He swore to protect and be there for Sam. Since he couldn't be there when Sam was growing up, he needed to protect him even if that meant from himself. He took a step back. Dean couldn't let his anger take control of him. It was not going to be like the last time he gave into his anger.

 _"You're just like me, Agent Smith, and there's nothing you do about it," Warren said playfully. He was in so much pain, and he knew he wasn't going to make it out of there, but he was going to take as much of Dean Smith's sanity as he could. He was going to enjoy the pain and horror he caused the man for as long as he could._

Dean shook his thoughts away. He couldn't let his mind wander too far down unwanted areas. He was not that man anymore.

 _"Dean, stop! He's dead." Morgan yelled pulling Dean off the bloody man beneath him. He wanted to puke at the condition the man was in._

"I'm not a killer. You kill people all the time, and for what? To get me back? Do you have any idea what that means? I'm the reason those people you killed are dead!"

 _"Nothing is ever going to happen to you, Sam. Since I'm older that makes me right. You're mine, Sammy, and I always protect what's mine." Dean wasn't one for chick flick moments, but Sam had woken him up after he had a bad dream, so it was only right he comfort him._

 _"I love you, Dean," Sam said as he falls asleep._

 _Dean smirked. He waited for Sam to fall completely asleep, before he did what he did. Even though Sam was his responsibility, he was still the oldest and that meant he had to keep up his image. When he was sure Sam was out, he leaned over him and gently kissed his forehead._

 _He whispered, "I love you too, Sammy."_

 _..._

 _"Morgan, why did you do that?" Dean asked as his whole team walked out of the chief's office. He was grateful that he wasn't alone in there, but he still had to know._

 _Morgan lightly touched his arm. "We're a team. We stick together, and we all know that you had no choice. What he's been doing to you for years was wrong, and no one can blame you for what you did."_

 _"Don't worry sweetheart," Garcia said hugging him. She cared about Dean a little more than the others so after what happened she could only care that much more. "He can't hurt you anymore."_

"You're a monster, Sam. You and Castiel are no different than the people I arrest on the job."

* * *

Sam sneered, "You think I'm a monster?! Well, you know what... I would choose that a million times over than be a fucking traitor." He pushed Dean, and waited for the punch that he saw that Dean was about to throw.

Dean flinched back and halted his fist from flying. Ever since he saw Sam on that video that brought him to South Dakota, Dean had seen himself as a traitor. They shouldn't be on separate sides of the law. In the back of his mind, Dean had always seen himself as a traitor, because despite who his family was he still valued family. So yes, Dean's a traitor, but it hurts so much more coming from the man who was once his brother.

Sam's anger washed away when he saw nothing but hurt on Dean's face. He wished he could take it back, but in a way he doesn't want to. He needs Dean to face the truth, and sometimes the truth is much worse and hurtful than a lie. He sighed. Sam figured that he could've done that without being so hurtful.

"Dean-"

"Forget it Sam." Dean knew he was right, but that didn't mean he wanted to talk about it. "What happened to John? And tell me the truth. I don't want to hear anything about a heart attack." Dean could see the hesitancy on Sam's face and yelled, "Tell me!"

Sam sighed, "A year before I went to Hell, Dad and I were coming back from dealing with this demon who took something from us. Then a semi truck hit us. We were taken to the hospital, and we were both fine all things considered. What was taken from us was a special gun that is able to kill anything including the demon that killed our mother. So, Dad summoned a demon and made a deal. His life for the Colt."

"Where the hell were you?!" Dean demanded. His body was shaking, and for the life of him he couldn't get it to stop.

"He sent me away to get a coffee; next thing I know the gun is there and he's dead."

"Why would they want him? Why was his life so special?" He remembered how John would always leave them alone at motels or Bobby's. He remembered how John always talked with people, and they would always come to him for something.

"Because Dad was an excellent hunter. He sent many of the demons back to Hell. He was too feared. Getting him out of the way would've saved a lot of demons so much trouble. Dad did what he needed to do to avenge mom, and to stop the bastard from ever doing it again to anyone else."

* * *

"What about me?" Dean yelled. "What about what I needed? He did what he did for other people and for a woman that has been dead for years. I was still there! You were there, but all he did was focus on other people and a damn demon! When I left you that night, I kept looking back to see if any of you would come after me, but no one was there."

Sam furrowed his brows. "Dean, I begged you to stay. I was on my knees begging you not to leave me. You were going to do whatever you wanted. You decided to go on your own."

"You never had a younger sibling, so you would never understand what I had to go through. Ever since Mom died, you were mine to protect from anything and everything. I had to raise you myself because John went out on hunts. I couldn't even let Bobby take care of you. When John would come back, I had to help clean him up and then do it all over again. When is someone going to do the same for me? Where is my protector?"

Sam could feel tears stinging his eyes. He wanted to reach out to Dean, but knew he would only push him away. He could feel Bobby slowly making his way inside. He couldn't feel more happy about that. This was a private moment for him and Dean. As he listened to Dean, Sam couldn't feel more shitty. He had no idea that this was what Dean felt, and he didn't like it.

"Do you not understand that a person needs to feel wanted? Supernatural, real or not, it wouldn't have mattered. If either of you would've come after me to show me that you really wanted me, I would've stayed. Seeing you or Dad come for me, I would've gone back damn college."

As they yelled at each other, Dean began to see things. The flashes were going in and out. One moment he would see Sam, and the next he would see something else. Dean pushed Sam away, when Sam came closer to him, clutching his head. He shut his eyes fighting against the pain the flashes were causing.

Sam stumbled back, and he was going to retaliate but seeing Dean in distress stopped him. He reached out, "Dean-"

Dean pulled back, "Get away from me!"

 _"...most importantly-" John trailed off._

 _"-watch out for Sammy. I know." Dean finished looking back at his brother sitting in the chair. His dad told him the same thing every time he left, and Dean would always take it to heart._

Dean fell to his knees. He whimpered, "Help me." _Please, Sammy._

 _"Why don't we have a mom, Dean? Where does Dad go?" Sam asked looking up at him as they watched their dad walk out on them for another hunt._

 _Dean wanted to cry at the innocence of his brother's questions. He bit back that need, because he wasn't a little kid anymore. He needed to grow up for the sake of his brother. He practically begged, "Quit asking, Sam. You don't want to know."_

 _..._

 _"Are monsters real?" asked Sam looking at him from the other bed. He could see the debate happening in Dean's head._

 _Dean knew he wouldn't be able to get out of telling Sam the truth. His brother saw their dad's journal, and he couldn't tell him anything that would make him believe otherwise. He had no choice. "Monsters are real. Dad fights them."_

Sam looked down at Dean in pain. "Cas!" Sam held onto Dean who was holding onto him tight. Castiel came running out and ordered Bobby to go watch Deanna. "Cas! Hurry."

Flash after flash went through Dean's mind. Flashes that showed his hunts with John and Sam before he left. Hunts that he went on with John alone. He tried to shake them away. They were not real. They couldn't be real. He looked up at Sam and pounced on him.

Castiel didn't know what to do as he watched Dean on top of Sam, but he had to trust that Sam knew what he was doing. He fought back against everything that he believed and lived by that Sam was his to protect against anything and everything that wanted to hurt him. Since Dean didn't know what was happening to him, he could hurt Sam without even thinking twice about it.

Dean saw Sam move his arms, and thought that he was going to knock him off. Dean's reflexes were too quick and he pinned Sam's arms to the side of his head. Sam didn't say anything. He could see Dean fighting against something. Whatever it was that was going through Dean's mind was hurting him. He just wished that whatever it was would stop. He wished he knew what was happening to him, because seeing Dean hurting was just awful to see.

"Dean?"

"Tell me what happened that night. Please, tell me." Tears came down Dean's face and a few landed on Sam's cheek. "I've spent fifteen years ignoring what happened. Now that you're here, I can't seem to tell the difference between what I believe and what I know."

"Dean, I-"

"Tell me!" Dean screamed.

* * *

"Okay, Dean. I'll tell you, but you have to calm down." There was no way that Dean would be able to understand or even pay attention to anything he said to him if he wasn't able to get control of whatever it was that was going on in Dean's head.

If looks could kill, Dean would probably be killed by Castiel for killing Sam. "Tell me," Dean growled.

"Okay. FIfteen years ago, you-"

Sam and Dean's attention whipped towards the entrance of the salvage yard. Both brother's cursed at the sound of police sirens. Dean sighed heavily getting both him and Sam to their feet. They could hear the police sirens somewhere close by.

"You have to go, Sam." Dean gently ordered not looking away from the entrance.

Sam turned to his brother jaw dropped. "But, Dean-"

"I don't think I was meant to hear the truth. Something seems to always get in your way of telling me. They found my car, and they'll no doubt find us here. Now that they know who I really am, Garcia will have no trouble linking me to Bobby. With her, they'll probably be here in a matter of ten or fifteen minutes. That's plenty of time for you all to get away."

"What about you?"

Dean took several breaths and looked around at the bodies that they were surrounded by. "I can't leave. If they find this place, they'll think you and Castiel did this."

Sam shrugged his shoulders. "So what if they do? They already think we're psychotic murderers anyway; what's a few more?"

Dean wiped his eyes, and he chuckled. "That's what being your big brother means. I protect you from whatever it is that wants to hurt you. I don't care if Castiel is your husband, you're mine Sam, and I protect what's mine."

Sam didn't know what to say. He looked to Castiel who didn't look at all pleased to hear that Dean claimed Sam as his which made Sam smile. Staking a claim on Sam was something that both Dean and Castiel were going to have to work out on their own. That was a fight that Sam was more than willing to stay out of. Just hearing the love in Dean's voice made Sam's heart swell.

"Besides, I can't let you take the wrap for this one. This one is on me. If you didn't come looking for me, you wouldn't have left your daughter here. Which means, none of you would've been here for them to find."

This was what only Dean can give to Sam that Castiel would never be able to: unconditonal love and loyalty. After fifteen years apart... after the work of a witch... after so many people telling Dean what they believed Sam to be, Dean still chose to put Sam first.

Sam walked to Castiel, and they made their way to the house when they heard Dean call them. Sam turned back to his brother picking up his gun.

"What made you want to find me in the first place?"

"What do you mean? I told you. You don't give up on family. I didn't want to give up on you." He looked to Castiel in question, but he only recieved a shrug. Sam rolled his eyes.

"No, that's not what I'm talking about. Something must have happened that made you come look for me. Family means everything to a Winchester, but you obviously had other things to worry about. Supernatural aside, you have a husband. What was the real reason you came after me?"

Sam smirked. He knew he couldn't keep this to himself forever, and he was stupid to think Dean would never figure it out. "Wanting you in my life was not the reason that pushed me to come after you, but it was a very important person that made me realize that I need you just as much as I need Castiel. After he told me to find you, that's all Castiel and I've been doing and I'm glad he told me."

"Who?"

"Are you ready to hear the truth, Dean? If you don't, you can walk away. I don't want you to go, but if you do I won't bother you ever again."

Dean stared at his brother and Castiel. Did he really want to? He did come here instead of staying with the BAU. Sure he told Sam to tell him what happened, but that was when his emotions were going crazy. Now that he was more in control of himself, he was more aware. So did he really want to know? He looked to the entrance. The sirens seemed to be getting closer. Dean knew they didn't have much time.

With clear determination in his voice he said, "Yes."

* * *

 **AN: Did you like it? Thoughts? I get that a lot of you are confused, but** _ **hopefully**_ **when the time comes, everything will make sense. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: I really do hope that my explanation makes sense. Enjoy!**

* * *

 _ **Then:**_

Sam banged his head on the table. He groaned. He was so hungry, and fucking Castiel was taking too damn long. He reached for his phone about to call the angel, but just as he did the door opened. Sam sighed in relief.

"About time," Sam said getting to his feet and reached for the bags of food.

Castiel gave it to him and chuckled. He checked his watch. "I've only been gone for twenty minutes."

Sam bit into his burrito and moaned at the heavenly taste. "Twenty minutes too long."

"You could've just come with me."

Sam sat down and shook his head. "Naw. I needed to search for a new hunt. I'm getting a little restless."

Castiel sat across from him, and dug into his own food. "We just finished a hunt two days ago. Besides I want to talk to you about something."

Sam looked up from his food, and raised an eyebrow. Castiel only ever said that when the situation was serious. He put his food down and gave his attention to his boyfriend. He smiled. He never thought he would ever be in a relationship with an actual angel, and a male one at that.

"Sounds serious. Is everything okay?"

Castiel cleared his throat, and rose to his feet. He tried to fight against the nerves of what he was about to do. He slowly reached into his pocket and took out a small box. He took a deep breath, and got to one knee in front of Sam.

Sam stared down at Castiel in shock. He didn't think Castiel was really doing what he thought he was doing. Then again, the small box and getting to one knee was confirming it.

"I know this isn't the most romantic way to do it, but I want to do it before my nerves stop me."

"Cas?" Sam's heart was racing very quickly just staring at the angel.

"Sam I love you very much, and I know that our situation is different from other people, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don't care about what you did in Hell, because I know that wasn't you. You are an amazing man who would put complete strangers before yourself. Being your guardian angel was the best choice I could've ever made. Sam Winchester, will you marry me?"

Sam could feel his eyes glistening with unshed tears. His jaw dropped at the love and devotion behind Castiel's words. He loved Castiel more than his own life, but he never thought he would be proposed to.

"Sam," Castiel said breaking through Sam's thoughts, "can you please say something?"

"I.. I can't." Sam got out of his chair backing away from Castiel. "I can't."

Castiel's heart felt like it was breaking into a million pieces. He didn't think he would ever hear Sam saying no. He thought by now they would be ready to celebrate. He felt like a kicked puppy. "Why not?" Castiel didn't know why Sam looked so scared. "I thought you loved me."

"I do. I love you more than life itself."

"So, why?"

Sam bowed his head not wanting Castiel to see his tears falling. "You can't marry me. You're an angel."

"So? My being an angel doesn't change the fact that I'm in love with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"That's what makes it worse. I'm the one with demon blood who did terrible things in Hell. I was chosen to lead a demon army against who knows who. I'm the one who is corrupting a fucking angel of the Lord. I'm tainted Castiel."

Castiel's face softened. He walked to Sam, and cupped his face. Without saying a word, Castiel pulled Sam into a very special kiss. He didn't want it to be passionate or full of lust. He just wanted Sam to know that his words weren't true.

Sam wanted to push Castiel away, but he needed the connection just as bad. He clutched onto Castiel's trench coat.

Castiel pulled away, but not too far. "Sam, you are not tainted in any way. Even if you are, I don't care. The blood that runs through your veins is apart of you. It's just another reason why I love you. You knew about the demon's plans for you, yet you didn't once give into them. You fought against him, and you killed him. You avenged your mother, who I know is proud of you. What you did in Hell isn't your fault. You broke Sam, everyone breaks. I would've done the same thing if I were in your place."

Sam couldn't fight those words. This wasn't the first time Castiel had spoken those words to him. In fact this would be the third time since they've been together that Castiel had to say it to Sam. After each time, Sam was believing less in his words and more in trying to convince himself.

"If you don't want to marry me, that's okay, but I'm not going to stand here and listen to you talk bad about yourself. You and I both know you're only saying this because you don't believe you deserve the love I'm willing to give you. If loving and needing to be with you forever is corrupting me, then do it! I'm fine with that. Haven't I proven to you that being with you is worth everything and anything?"

Sam nodded and smiled softly, "Ask me again?"

A grin broke across Castiel's face. He opened the box and displayed a beautiful ring. "Will you mar-"

"YES!" Sam threw himself at Castiel, and they both crashed to the floor. As they made out, Castiel managed to slip the ring on Sam's finger. Once it was on, they were finally able to celebrate.

* * *

Castiel took over the driving while Sam had taken a nap. Castiel couldn't believe it! Sam had said yes to him. He was officially the happiest angel in the world and Heaven. He just couldn't get rid of the grin that spread across his face. He looked to Sam leaning against the window, and couldn't believe that this was the man that was going to be his in every way. They did have sex plenty of times during their time together, but now they were going to be doing it as husbands.

As he drove them to an old friend of John's, Castiel did feel a little sad for Sam. He knew that during weddings, the groom would have a best man. When Castiel had asked Sam about that, he could see the sadness and loss behind his eyes. Castiel had chosen his brother Gabriel, and Sam eventually chose Bobby. It wasn't the same as Dean, but Bobby was still a great friend.

Before Sam had crashed out, he had called a few friends to head over to the pastor that would do the ceremony. At first Sam didn't want anything big or special, but Castiel convinced him since this was going to be their first and last wedding. Castiel wanted it to be special for Sam, even if Sam made it seem like he didn't want it to be.

* * *

The next morning, they arrived at the church that they were going to do their wedding. Castiel had called ahead to those who were going to attend and asked if they could set everything up before they came. He didn't want Sam to do anything but get ready.

It came time for them both to get in their tuxedos, and get into place. Sam loved that his friends came and that they actually dressed nice. Sam stood in front of Castiel. He was glad that Castiel had talked him into inviting his friends. As he looked around, he knew something was missing... or rather someone. When he thought about getting married, he had hoped that Dean would be there as his best man. He loved Bobby like a second father, but it wasn't the same. Dean was supposed to be behind him, not Bobby.

He put all thoughts of Dean aside, and focused on the man he was about to marry. He looked into Castiel's eyes, and he could swear everything else disappeared. He listened as Pastor Jim gave the introductions, and then came the moment that they would give their vows.

"Sam, you can begin."

Sam took a deep breath. "Cas, the moment I first saw you I fell in love with you. I knew right then and there that you were it for me. I didn't know anything as amazing as you could ever love someone like me. I don't deserve you or your love, but one day I hope I can believe that I do. For now, I'm willing to accept whatever you can give me and give it back to you just as much. I promise that from this day forward, that it's you and me against the world. No matter what comes our way, I promise to stand by your side. You're my angel, and I will love you until my last breath."

Castiel stood there holding onto Sam's hands and listened to his beautiful words. He couldn't imagine never knowing Sam. He didn't know what he would be like if Sam wasn't the center of his world... his reason for living. When Sam first mentioned having to express their feelings in front of everyone who showed up, Castiel didn't understand the importance. Now, he didn't think he could marry Sam without letting his father, the rest of the angels, and their friends know how he felt about Sam.

"Castiel, you may go."

"Sam, from the moment I heard about you I just had to see you. Mary's glow was so beautiful and I couldn't get enough of it, because she was carrying you. Then when I saw you being born, I knew you were the reason for my existence. I was created just for you, and I know I would not still be here if you were never born. I promise to defend you, protect you, and love you for the rest of my life. I promise to stand by you no matter what we face. I will gladly face every angel... every demon and even my father if it meant that I would be with you. You are mine, Sam, and I will destroy anything and everything that comes to hurt you. I will keep you safe, loved, and taken care of until the world stops spinning."

"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you two partners for life. You may kiss your-" Pastor Jim couldn't even finish before Castiel pulled him close, and kissed him as if they were alone. It got to the point where it was so passionate that it began to make the others uncomfortable.

"Hey lovebirds," laughed Gabriel, "save it for tonight. We don't want to see it."

Sam felt a tear fall down his face as he pulled away. He looked at the others and was slightly embarrassed that everyone saw them. Castiel on the other hand just looked upset that they had to stop. Sam knew for a fact that if Gabriel hadn't said anything, Castiel wouldn't have stopped until the clothes started coming off... maybe not even then. He kissed Castiel one last time.

* * *

The others clapped for them, and Sam couldn't stop smiling. He watched as Castiel turn to Gabriel to give him a hug. He turned around to do the same to Bobby, when he froze in his spot. His jaw hit the ground. It couldn't be. He looked around and saw that Bobby was standing next to Ellen.

"Hey, Sammy."

"Dean?"

Dean stood there in a nice suit, and he looked good. Sam tilt his head to the side studying his brother up and down. Something was different as he examined him. He felt himself being shoved back as Castiel got in front of him.

"What are you doing here? We didn't invite you."

Dean smirked and shoved his hands in his pockets as he watched Castiel. In fact, Dean seemed to find Castiel's behavior quite amusing. "Calm down, Feathers. Not by you two, but yeah we were invited."

"We?" Castiel narrowed his eyes. He looked around, and his gaze quickly stopped on a second blonde talking to Jo and Ash.

"Yes. Me and my wife." Dean looked at her like she was the center of his world, and Sam liked the happiness on his face. "Besides you didn't think I was actually going to miss my little brother's wedding, did you?" He stepped around to get to Sam which earned a growl from Castiel. "Congratulations, bro. I'm glad you and Castiel are happy."

"When did you get here? Why do you look different from the last time I saw you."

Dean waved his questions away. "Don't worry about it right now. Right now is all about you two. I promise we'll talk later."

Sam couldn't argue with Dean after the look he received. Castiel pulled him away to mingle with the others. Once he got to dancing with Castiel, everything else was forgotten. It was just the two of them in their own world.

* * *

The dancing didn't last as long as it would've had Dean and his wife not had shown up. When Sam had told them that he needed to speak with his brother and thanked everyone for coming, his friends quickly understood. They all said their goodbyes, and all four drove to a motel. Sam didn't bother changing seeing as how once Dean left, he and Castiel were going to just get rid of their clothes anyway. He smiled happily as he pictured the night once they were alone. For an angel, Castiel was very kinky.

Dean sat at the table while his wife sat on the bed. "You know, you were always too damn smart for your own good. The truth is I'm from the future... about five years."

Sam's mouth opened and closed several times before any sound came out. "How?"

"You and your boy toy sent me and Jennifer back here," Dean said gesturing to Castiel who was not at all please that Dean was there.

"What?"

"Time travel. It gets confusing. Basically, five years from now the Dean from this time gets sent back to this moment to see you both get married. I guess it'll just keep repeating. I'm not too sure about that whole situation."

"I thought you stayed away? How do you even know about Castiel?"

"That's also the other reason we came back. I need you to do something for me. I need you both to go find me."

Sam furrowed his brows. "What do you mean?"

As Dean opened his mouth, Jennifer spoke up. "Babe, it's almost time."

Dean sighed. "Right. I need to make this quick. It's very important that you both go find me and do what ever you can to get my attention. You have to get me to go with you."

Sam furrowed his brows. "Why? I know where you live, I can just go to you."

Dean shook his head. "It won't be that easy. I've been away from you guys for a long time. Around this time, I have my own life. Besides, just coming to me won't make me go with you. I'm a Winchester which means I'm stubborn as hell. I have to come to understand on my own that I need to be with you."

"I don't understand. You left. Why would you want to come back with us?"

Dean sighed and checked his watch. "I don't have enough time to explain everything. I just came back to see you get married, and to tell you what I hope you'll do. Something happened that night with the witch that's very hard to explain. I have to go, but I'll see you soon."

"Wait!" Sam shot out of his chair and reached for Dean. "You just got here. I haven't seen you in so long; I have so much to talk to you about."

Dean chuckled, and patted Sam on the back. "Don't worry Sammy, you're mine so that means that you and I will never be able to stay away from each other forever. Besides, I'm not the brother that you need to talk to. I have my own Sammy in my time. Just remember that family doesn't give up on each other. I didn't give up on you or stop believing in you after what I found out and I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. No matter how long it takes, don't give up on me. When the time comes where I explain something very important to you, please... please believe in me too."

Jennifer and Dean gave Sam a hug. Dean went to Castiel, "Don't hate me so quickly because of something I had no choice doing."

Castiel cross his arms and glared at him. "Goodbye Dean."

Dean smirked and shook his head. He grabbed Jennifer's hand, "Oh and Cas?" He turned back and he looked very threatening. Sam could swear that he looked like Castiel does when facing an enemy. "You hurt what's mine in any way, angel or not, I will kill you."

Before Castiel or Sam could respond, they vanished. Castiel growled and pulled Sam to him very possessively. Sam was very amused with him. "Don't worry, Cas, you know I'm yours."

"Damn right you're mine."

Castiel didn't give Sam time to dwell on Dean. As soon as possible, Sam found themselves on the bed with no clothes. This was just another reason to be married to an angel. Less time taking off clothes. They celebrated their wedding night like any other newlyweds. Sam and Castiel found sex to be all the more good because of the reason behind it.

It was very late in the night, when they were too exhausted to keep going. Castiel cleaned them up, since Sam couldn't move. When it was all done, Castiel wrapped the blankets around them, and they could feel sleep tugging at them. They had no problem giving in.

"You know other than Dean coming back, another great thing came out of his visit," Sam said yawning.

Castiel wrapped his arms around Sam and pulled him closer, "What?"

Sam smiled and could feel a warm sense of peace wrapping around him that he had leaned was Castiel's wings. Castiel had taken to doing that to stop his nightmares. "Looks like we're going to be uncles."

* * *

 _ **Now:**_

"Wait, hold on. You're telling me that I came back from the future to see you two get married, and tell you to come find me?" Sam and Castiel nodded. "I'm still wrapping my head around the fact that angels and demons might be real. I don't think I can believe that time traveling is real too. You're going to have to think of another explanation that actually makes sense."

Sam sighed and took out his wallet. Dean watched as Sam handed him a photo. He looked down and saw Castiel, Sam, Ash, Bobby, two women that he didn't know, and... His head shot up to Sam and raised an eyebrow. Sam smiled and nodded. Dean had no idea what to make of it. Not only did he see himself obviously older, but he was with a blonde woman that he had had feelings for a long time.

Their attention whipped to the entrance of yard; the sirens were getting closer. Dean gave him back the photo. "What happened that night?"

Sam could tell that he didn't have much time to explain, so he prayed that Dean would listen and believe him. "Okay, but you can't interrupt. The night that we went after the witch, she did something to you. Dean had explained in a letter that he gave me before he went back. It said that the witch wasn't actually evil at all. People who believed in her ability to do magic came to her and asked for things."

"What kind of things?"

"The kind of things that they wanted. If they had money, they would go to her and she would do magic for them."

"So, then why did we go after her?"

"Because at the time we were only looking at the deaths that were caused by her magic. We connected the people to her and assumed that she was the one that was killing them."

"I don't understand. What does any of that have to do with me?"

"Because she did the same thing to you. She looked inside you and saw the inner turmoil that you were going through and connected it with hunting and the life. She gave you what you wanted, which was to leave the life. The consequences for that was you had to believe that what we did was never real."

* * *

"FBI! Sam and Castiel Winchester don't move!" Dean could hear Morgan yell.

They all looked to the far end and saw that his team and the local police were arriving. He didn't know what to do. In a matter of seconds the police would have Sam and Castiel under arrest. They would take their daughter to who knew where. Dean couldn't let that happen.

Bobby had come out of the house with Deanna and her things and handed her to Sam. The police were getting that much closer. He wanted Dean to come with them, only because he wanted Sam to be happy. He dragged Sam to the car and they both got in. Sam held Deanna close to him.

"Dean, I did all of this for you. I can't come back to you again like this. I have my daughter and Castiel to think about. Please, come with us." Castiel started the car.

"Sam, you have to go."

Dean stared in his brother's pleading eyes, and could see that Sam really needed him... just like he needed Sam. His future self came back to get Sam to come find him. He shouldn't have ever left in the first place. If he had stayed with Sam, he couldn't imagine how his life would've turned out. Bad or good, he would've been with Sam.

"Dean, please. Ask yourself what's worth sacrificing: what you want or what you need?"

Dean stood there next to the car as Sam held out his hand for him to take.

"Please come with me. I need you."

 _"I'm always going to be your big brother, and I'm always going to be there when you need me."_

 _"I need you now."_

Dean gasped with wide eyes. It was like seeing for the first time. He pushed Sam's hand away. "Go, Sam. Leave!"

Sam could only stare in great despair as his brother stepped away from him. His brother said no. Dean chose to stay. He turned around and stared out the back as Dean watched them go. Dean wasn't supposed to be back there. He was supposed to be in the car with him. If anything Dean should be the one driving. He hoped that Bobby got away safely. Castiel had made sure that the police would have no way of getting into the house. No matter what they used, they would not be able to get in.

Dean watched as the car drove off. He tilt his head as the car disappeared down past the piles of cars. He wondered why they would go down there when there was no other way to get out except for the front. He rolled his eyes. Right, angel.

"Dean, what happened?" demanded Hotch after he had ordered the others to go after the Impala.

Dean ignored him and pushed his way passed them. He ignored their calls. There was no way he was in the mood. He made his choice, and he hoped that Sam was okay with it. He just prayed that Sam would understand why Dean did what he did. He was Dean Winchester, and he finally remembered everything and sadly that wasn't entirely a good thing. This whole time, Dean Smith was the one that wasn't real. Now he knew. Regardless if he remembered, Sam needed to understand that he had things to do with the FBI.

As Dean climbed in the SUV that he arrived in, he remembered that spells usually ended when the one who cast it died or took it away themselves. But then there are times where the spells come across as one thing, but in fact... were something entirely different.

* * *

 **AN:** **Thoughts? Do you guys understand?** **Story is almost over and I'm hoping you guys are enjoying it. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: I've written this chapter multiple times, but this is the best I can get it to come out. If you don't understand please let me know. I'll be more than happy to explain it to you. Enjoy!**

* * *

A few days later, Dean sat in his living room drinking a beer. He heard footsteps coming up from behind him, but he didn't move or go for his gun. He had been waiting for this visit for a long time. Fifteen and half years to be exact. He held out the other beer he had brought out not too long ago for his visitor.

"Took you long enough," Dean said. He looked the other man up and down, "You know you look a lot better now than you did as a chick."

The visitor chuckled and took the offered beer. "Yeah, well fifteen and a half years does take a long time." The visitor sat down and put his feet up on the coffee table. "I looked hot as a woman and you know it. Anyway, when do you want to head back?"

Dean took a drink and had to think about his answer. He shook his head, "Not for a little while. I have to take care of a few more things before I go see Sam. Has everything worked out the way we needed it to?"

His friend nodded, "Yeah. Everything has gone according to how we need it. Don't worry, Dean. We're all fine, and perfectly happy with the way things turned out."

Dean sighed in relief. He knew that it was very important that what happened never came to pass, and if his 'friend' said it didn't then he was happy. "Was it worth it?"

His friend sighed and Dean could swear he looked so much older than he appeared. "If it meant protecting what's mine from years of loss and heartache, then it was worth it. I already told you why I had to cast the spell on you since I took you to see what happens firsthand. I couldn't let that happen. If it meant that Sam was with who he was supposed to be with and had their beautiful daughter, then yes, it was worth it."

Dean stared out of the front window. "What ever happened to the witch?"

"Oh, she took off. I told her what I needed to do, and she was more than willing to listen. I also told her that a few hunters were coming after her thinking she was a killer."

"That's good. I don't think I could take it if Sam killed an innocent woman. What was the point of doing the spell at all? It served no purpose."

"I told you that until Sam told you the truth, you wouldn't remember anything you did as a hunter. When I came to you each time, I had to make sure that you wouldn't remember what we did. Sam had to come to the conclusion that you stopped believing because it was what you wanted. That way when he does come to you, everything you felt was real. Only when he told you he needed you with a total understand on why, you would remember."

"Yeah, but now that I do remember our times together and what we did, I feel like I lied to Sam. Going to Hell and torturing him wasn't apart of the plan. Do you not realize that I hurt him so much down there?"

"Yeah, I do know. I know all too well. You have to realize that if you didn't do that then Sam would've been taught by Alastair, and you of all people should know that that is just as worse. I gave you another choice. You could've kept going until he came back, but you chose to be with him. I couldn't stop you from making that choice."

Dean slumped in his chair, "Yeah, but you didn't have to kill me if you really didn't want me to go." He groaned. "What the hell was the point of all of this? Why lie? Why stay away?"

His friend sat up getting a little annoyed with him. "Well, I couldn't take all that begging. Seriously, how many fucking times do I have to say it? You had to leave, because Sam had a destiny that he would never be able to fulfil if you stayed with him. He had to be the one to save the world from the apocalypse that would've happened had you stayed. He and Castiel had to do it together so they could have their child. That little girl is going to be very special because of what she is, and she's going to need all three of you to do what you need to. I'm sorry, Dean, but you couldn't be in his life. Everything you saw would've happened like it did in my time."

Dean rubbed his face in frustration. "I know that, but there was no other way that they could've gotten together with me still being there?"

"No. Because Castiel would've saved _you_ from Hell. Love aside, the bond Castiel has with Sam, he would've had it with you instead. Their daughter never would've been born. To Castiel, Sam would've just been the boy with the demon blood."

Dean knew he wouldn't have been able to go on knowing that Sam was in Hell because of him. He hated that he had to stay away from him in order to protect him. Sadly, he would do it all again minus the torture, if it meant that Sam would never have to go through the life that he would've had Dean stayed.

"You really shouldn't be asking me to begin with. Was it worth it, Dean? Protecting Sam from the horrible life that he could've suffered had you not left?"

"Of course it was. After seeing what you showed me, hell yeah it was worth it, but it doesn't mean that I like missing out on seeing him grow up. How is he going to react when I tell him?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "You accepted him for what he did, why wouldn't he accept you for what you are?"

Dean didn't answer. They sat there in silence for a few moments. "What was the whole point of the spell anyway?"

"I told you about the spell when I first came to you." He could feel the glare from Dean. He rubbed his face in frustration, "I told you that if you were able to get what you needed from him it would start to change you, but you agreed to it anyway. So that red headed bitch that made the spell said that it won't change what you'd become, but it also won't change how you feel about and look at Sam. No matter what you are, you would never forget what Sam means to you. No matter what, Sam's well being is your top concern. That includes anyone named Winchester in your family. Anyway, I got to go. Hopefully I won't ever have to come back. Get it right this time, Dean."

Dean jumped to his feet, "Wait! Why couldn't Castiel see me for what I am?"

His future self shrugged his shoulders, "That's the beauty of being what you are."

Dean watched as his future self disappeared back to his own time. He shook his head. He picked up his phone. He had a few things to take care of before he went to see Sam. He waited for the person he needed to deal with answered.

 _"Hello?"_

Dean took out his very special blade made of bone and grinned. "Hey, Morgan, you want to go out for a drink?"

* * *

Dean gave his location to Sam and Castiel that morning. He figured he could've just prayed to Castiel, but he needed to gather himself before they came. He leaned against the front of a car he had stolen and waited.

Now that he remembered everything, he couldn't help but feel even more of a traitor. He lied to Sam, but after what his future self had told him, he had no choice. Future!Dean had told him that if he didn't leave, horrible things would happen to Sam all because of him. Of course at the time he didn't believe him, but that changed when he was taken and shown the consequences of being with Sam.

After he left, Future!Dean came back to him and told him what he needed to do. He had to further his experience in hunting so he could prove himself. Dean loved hunting so that made no difference, but then came the day that Future!Dean gave him a very special blade. Dean didn't understand, so that's when he was told that he had to find and earn the other half to the blade. Dean obviously didn't like this, but Future!Dean made him realize that if he did what he needed to, he would be able to protect Sam from anything.

And that's what Dean did. While he wasn't working, he was making sure that everything went smoothly for Sam, and other than a few bumps here and there everything did.

Then came the day that would change his life forever. He searched for the man with the other half to the blade, and he got what he asked for. The man told him exactly what came with it, but Dean didn't care. Future!Dean would come back and lock what he did outside of his work and then Dean would go about his life as Dean Smith.

Future!Dean had told him that the blade needed to be used as often as possible, so Dean would go on hunts. Then Future!Dean came to give him a message saying that Sam went to Hell for him. Because of Sam's deal, Dean stopped seeing hunts everywhere. He lost contact with his hunting friends. He tried very hard to get Sam out of his deal, but not being able to get involved with the supernatural made it hard. So, Dean had no other choice but to get Future!Dean to kill him. He became what he hunted, but he couldn't care.

Seeing Sam in Hell being tortured was the worst thing he could ever imagine. He wanted to take over the role as his torturer to ease the pain, but he had to prove himself. Alastair was known to be the best, and Dean learned first hand that it was certainly the truth. After many years, Dean proved himself. He took over and went to work. He had to do it, but he didn't do as painful as he could've. He would do what he needed to, and think of an escape plan at the same time. It all changed when Alastair made his move to torture Sam himself, but Dean couldn't have that. Right when Alastair made a move toward Sam, Dean made his. He took his blade and drove it right through his chest.

Dean was at his wits end. He had gone back to earth to meet up with future self, but by the time he went back, Sam was torturing. He couldn't stand the look on Sam's face seeing him hurt other souls. He wanted to cry in relief when he saw a bright light coming for Sam.

When he came back, Future!Dean was able to get Future!Castiel to wipe his memory until Sam said the right words. Dean was all too happy for that.

Remembering his life without Sam, he knew he wanted more than anything to tell Sam the truth. Now that the future was fine, he didn't want to keep something like this from him. He swore when his future self came to him that as soon as he knew that their future would be alright, he was going to tell Sam everything. He really hoped that his future self was right. He needed Sam to be okay with him.

Dean looked up when he heard the familiar rumble of the Impala. He watched as Castiel stepped out of the driver's side. He waited near the front of the car for Sam and their daughter. His heart skipped a beat at the sight of her. From his distance, he could tell she was beautiful. He stepped away from the car and met them half way.

 _Please, let Sam welcome me back._

* * *

"Hey, Sammy."

"Why are we here, Dean?" Sam asked rocking Deanna. He really hoped that Dean wanted to come with him, but after what happened at Bobby's he didn't want to get his hopes up just for them to fall apart.

Dean cleared his throat. "I was wondering if it was too late to take you up on your offer."

Sam fought hard against the smile that wanted to form. He handed Castiel Deanna and stepped closer to his brother. "Why did you stay? Why didn't you just come with us when I asked you to?"

Dean sighed. He figured that Sam deserved the truth. "I had to stay to take care of a few things. I had to make sure that you all got away including Bobby. I had to take care of my property, and everything that comes with it. I had to change my name back to Dean Winchester, and give my resignation."

"Dean-"

Dean cut him off, "I know I hurt you that day, but I couldn't go with you without knowing what the FBI knows. I had to make sure they didn't know where you were. Sam, I'm sorry. I really wanted to go with you, but I couldn't... not then. I know I don't deserve it, at all, but please let me come back. I need you. I need to be with my family."

Sam's eyes widened at what Dean had done. He didn't think that that was what his brother was doing when he told Sam to leave. He threw himself at Dean and embraced him. This was so much better than what he thought. His brother chose him after all. He had a brother again.

* * *

They broke apart, and Dean cleared his throat. He looked to Castiel and was amused at the hatred on his face. Dean looked back to his brother. "Can I hold her?"

Sam opened his mouth, but Castiel beat him to it. "No!"

Sam sighed. "Cas, let him hold her. I trust him with her just as much as I trust you."

Castiel rolled his eyes, and slowly handed Deanna to Dean. Dean carefully took his niece in his arms. He looked down at her, and she stared up at him. He loved the fact that she had their mother's eyes, but even more at the fact that they were more like his. She stared up at him, and he could swear that she was looking into his soul. Dean knew that at that moment, everything he did was most definitely worth it all. He held her closer, and he could admit that he was in love.

Castiel wrapped an arm around Sam as they both watched Dean hold Deanna. He didn't want to, but he could put aside his anger and say that Dean looked good with her. If Dean really was going to be with them, Sam would finally be completely happy. As long as Dean didn't hurt Sam any more than he has already, Castiel could learn to accept him.

Sam watched as Dean held Deanna, and loved the way they looked. Dean showed pure happiness as he stared at Deanna. It was even amazing that she hadn't cried when Dean took her. She would put up a fuss when Bobby, Ellen, or even Jo tried to hold her. The way they looked almost seemed like they already knew each other.

"What's her name?" asked Dean not looking away from his niece.

"Deanna," Sam said softly.

Dean looked up and tilt his head. "You named her after our grandmother?"

Sam shook his head. "I named her after you. This might seem silly, but the day she was born I could swear that I heard your voice. So, it only seemed right to name her after you. Say hello to Deanna Cassie Winchester."

Dean's eyes glistened. "Thank you Sam. That means so much to me."

* * *

Dean relunctantly handed her to Sam, but swore that when he got the chance again he would hold her. Dean grabbed his bags, and left the keys in the car closing the door. He went to the Impala and threw his bags in the car. He walked back and went up to Castiel.

"Sam, step back." Sam looked at him confused but did as he was told. Dean stared at Castiel, and the angel at him. "We need to talk."

Castiel nodded, "Yes, we do." Without another word, Castiel brought his hand back and punched Dean square in the face. He stood there as Dean went down.

"Cas!" Sam yelled in alarm. "Why the hell did you do that?"

Castiel held his hand out to Sam to stop him. "This is between me and Dean. I trusted you, so please trust me."

Dean expected the punch, but he didn't think the angel would hold back. He got to his feet and wiped the blood from his mouth. He cracked his neck. "Oh, come on Feathers. You can do better than that," Dean taunted. He threw his own punch at Castiel, and his fist hit its target.

Castiel was surprised that Dean was able to land a punch. No human can hurt an angel. He glared at Dean narrowing his eyes. Something was different about the man who stood before him. "Don't tempt me, Dean."

Dean shook his head with a smirk. "This wasn't the kind of talk I was thinking about."

"Then what did you want to talk about?" Castiel crossed his arms.

"Sam. We obviously don't agree on who Sam truly belongs to. I say Sam is mine, and you say he's yours. Clearly, if we're going to be working with each other, we need to come to some kind of understanding."

Castiel growled. "He's been mine before he was even born. He's mine in every way that he cannot be with you." Castiel shoved Dean back, but not as hard as he could've.

Dean glared at Castiel. "I'm not talking about sexual or romantic you feathered freak!" Dean shoved back just as hard which caused Castiel to lose his footing. "If he wasn't truly mine, then he wouldn't have felt incomplete without me; just like I can't be without him."

Dean and Castiel grabbed onto each other's collar, and was about to hit at the same time when he heard Sam scream at them. They froze in their spot and stared at Sam.

Sam huffed, "You two need to fucking stop acting like I'm a possession. I'm both of yours in every way I can't be with the other." He cursed and made his way back to the car. "Fucking acting like children," he mumbled.

Dean and Castiel went back to staring at each other. Dean said low but strong, "Alright. He's mine, but he belongs to you. Agreed?"

Castiel narrowed his eyes determining if Dean was being honest. He didn't like it, but if it meant that Sam would be happy, they would have to put their fighting aside. "Agreed."

They let the other go, and brushed their clothes. Castiel put two fingers to Dean's forehead, and walked back to the car.

Before Castiel opened the door, he threw the keys at Dean who caught them automatically. "Want to drive?" He didn't wait for Dean's response and made his way in the back next to Deanna who was out like a light.

* * *

Dean sat on the bed closest to the door. He set up all the salt lines, and was careful about it. He watched in awe as Sam breastfed Deanna. He knew it was weird staring at his brother, but he couldn't help it. Sam was the first man ever to actually give birth to a child.

Sam was about done feeding her and went to burp her, but Dean stepped up and asked if he could do it. Sam stared at him in slight shock but agreed. He directed Dean on the proper way to do it. When she burped, Sam held out his hands for her, but brought them back down when he saw how Dean was with her.

"She's really beautiful, Sammy."

Sam smiled, "Thank you." He looked back at the his bed, and then back to Dean. " We don't have a crib yet, and she usually sleeps with us, but... would you like to sleep with her tonight? If she wakes up, you can let me and Castiel know."

Dean's eyes lit up at the mention of spending more time with her. He nodded, and set up his bed to accomodate the child. He put her down, and she went to sleep in no time.

Castiel had come back with dinner and didn't give much thought to seeing Deanna laying with Dean. In fact, he was kind of happy about it. At least this way, he can finally have Sam to himself without fear of squishing her.

As they ate their food, Dean couldn't stop staring at Deanna. Sam and Castiel were in the middle of a conversation when Dean interrupted them.

"Hey, Feathers," Castiel rolled his eyes but let the name slide, "can all angels time travel?"

"Yes, why?"

"I was wondering if you could take me to the night she was born? I've missed out on a lot, and-"

Sam cut him off, "Of course you can. Do you want to go tonight, or tomorrow?" He bit into his burrito.

Dean rubbed his neck. "I was kind of hoping tonight."

"Sure."

It was then they realized that they had an issue. They all couldn't go since Deanna had just went to sleep. She would get cranky when she was woken up. Castiel saw their problem right away and spoke up.

"I'll send you two back. The whole thing only took about fourty five minutes to an hour for her to be born. I'll come back for you both in an hour."

Dean braced himself for the trip, and just as quickly as Castiel touched them he found them on a road. It wasn't that hard to find the Impala seeing as how the screaming drew him to the car.

Dean made his way closer, but stopped. He looked to his brother, "Can they see or hear us?"

Sam shook his head. "Castiel made sure they couldn't. Neither of us remember seeing you and me here the first time."

Dean nodded his understanding. He went up to the car with confidence knowing that he wouldn't be seen. Watching Sam give birth was both strange and wonderful. He went around to the door that Past!Sam was leaning against.

Past!Sam screamed in pain. _"I don't want to do this anymore. I can't."_

Dean didn't like hearing him say that he wanted to give up. Past!Castiel tried to convince Past!Sam to keep going, but he was in too much pain. Dean bit back the sudden anger.

"Don't you give up, Sam!" Dean screamed. He ignored Sam's protests. "Don't you dare think about giving up! You can do this. I need you to do this. Do it for her," Dean begged.

Dean felt pride at the fact that Past!Sam was able to hear him and listen to him. Dean ran around the car, just in time to see Deanna coming out. Seeing his brother's bottom half naked wasn't something Dean wanted to see, but it was worth it seeing a beautiful baby being born.

Sam stared at his brother encouraging his past self. _So, that's where that came from._ He couldn't believe it. He had been wanting his brother to be with him, and Dean was there the whole time. The day that Deanna was born, Dean had already chosen to be with them.

Dean stood next to Sam as Past!Sam and Past!Castiel watched their daughter. Dean felt a few tears fall down seeing his Sammy hold his baby girl.

"So, do you consider yourself the mother or father?"

Sam shrugged his shoulders not looking away from the scene before him. "I don't care either way, but when it comes to her, I'm perfectly fine with being her mom. Though one day, I hope she understands that I'm still her father."

Dean chuckled. He checked his watch. Castiel wasn't going to pick them up for another ten minutes. They could see Past!Sam and Past!Castiel getting ready to leave. Dean wanted to be with them for as long as possible. Past!Castiel was shuffling Past!Sam to the front seat. Dean motioned for Sam to get into the car while the back door was still open.

Dean leaned over Past!Sam to stare at their newborn and smiled. Past!Sam was getting tired.

 _"What do you want to name her?"_ asked Past!Castiel.

Sam tapped on Dean's shoulder and pointed to his watch. Castiel was going to get them in a few seconds. Dean leaned closer to Past!Sam's ear, "I love you, Sam."

Just as he was being pulled by the angel, he heard Sam say, _"Deanna Cassie Winchester."_

* * *

 **AN: One more chapter. I really hope you guys are understanding. Most of what I've told you about Dean's past was from Sam's POV. In case you don't understand, Dean left Sam so the canon version wouldn't happen. If you haven't already guessed it, Dean has the Mark. He got it so he would be able to protect Sam without actually being with him. Deanna has a very special role when she gets older, so it was important that she be born. If you still don't understand something, please don't hesitate to let me know what you're confused about. Until next time. -Kauri510**


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: All right, this is it! The last and final chapter. Hopefully a lot of your confusion will be eased. There will be certain things for you to think about on your own. Enoy!**

* * *

Hotch called in his team and waited for everyone to gather. He looked at the others with a raised eyebrow. His team seemed oblivious as to what was missing.

"Where's Morgan?"

Reid looked up from a copy of the police report. "He texted us saying that he was going to go see his family. He'll be back next week."

Hotch sat down, and motioned for Garcia to get to work. After hearing the explanation from Reid, he was no longer bothered by the fact. Morgan had done this twice before in their whole working together, and although Morgan was so supposed to request the time off officially, Hotch wasn't all that bothered by it.

"So, what? A slaughter of people were killed in a club? Why would we be brought into this?" Emily asked.

"Other than the fact that it's a slaughter," Garcia pointed the remote at the screen. Several pictures of people were beheaded. "It's very close to the murders that Sam and Castiel Winchester have committed."

Garcia displayed many more pictures showing each body with their heads cut off. Rossi, who has been apart of the FBI for many years, had to look away at the gruesome nature of the scene.

"They're back?" Reid asked.

Garcia nodded. She hesitated with the showing what came next. It didn't matter if she was apart of the FBI, she was still upset that she was showing this. Showing it to the others felt like she was betraying someone she really cared about. Unfortunately, she had to do her job which meant she would have no choice but to do it. She pointed the remote once again but couldn't look.

"It's not Sam and Castiel this time."

She heard several gasps. Even though she wasn't looking at the screen, she knew exactly what they were looking at. Displayed on the screen was Castiel and Dean Winchester leaving the scene. No one spoke for several minutes. They could only stare at the man that they once worked with. A man that they had come to see as a friend.

"Dean's joined up with Castiel," Garcia said with regret and sorrow in her voice. She had come to love Dean. He was a very good friend to her, and she loved mothering him.

"What the hell? Isn't Castiel supposed to be working with Sam? Why would he be with Dean?" JJ sighed.

Reid leaned back in his chair, "Well, either Sam wasn't there during this particular murder, or Castiel and Dean had joined up and ditched Sam."

"Why would Dean join with either of them?" Rossi asked leaning forward. "He seemed pretty adamant on Sam's mental illnesses."

"Dean _is_ Sam's brother. Their illness does run in the family. Either that or Sam convinced Dean to believe in what he does."

While the team went over the details for the case, JJ exchanged a few glances with one other person on the team. They were told to lead the team to this very case, and that's what they were going to do. They didn't want to look at themselves as betraying the team, even if that's what they were doing. JJ wanted to help people... it was why she joined the FBI, but she saw she could help more people with the man she loved.

As the team picked up to go to their new case, JJ texted the man she loved more than anything.

 _On our way._

A moment later, her phone buzzed notifying her of a new message. She read the message and smiled.

 _See ya then, baby._

* * *

Dean tapped the steering wheel over and over. He was so nervous and a little scared. He knew that it was time for Sam to know the truth. He had too many misses with the Devil's Traps Sam had made for their recent hunts and especially this past hunt. It was Castiel's turn to stay behind with Deanna, and Sam had been itching for a hunt. Castiel was a little hesitant on letting Sam go on a hunt for a demon by himself, but it was clearly his turn to watch Deanna.

So far, Sam still had no idea that Dean knows just as much as Sam does concerning hunting. He's been around when it came to hunting monsters and demons. When Sam had agreed that if Dean was going to be with them, that he should brush up on his hunting skills, Dean had to bite his tongue to keep him from speaking up.

Dean struggled with the trap, not because he was afraid of it, but because he didn't want to trap himself and leave Sam defenseless. What he had come to learn was that now that he remembered everything, what he was was slowly being revealed to other demons. He knew that Castiel was already getting suspicious. Sooner or later, the angel was going to see him for what he was, and no doubt tell Sam. If Sam were to know, then Dean wanted to be the one to do it.

Anyway, the demon had managed to knock Sam out of the nearest window. Luckily for the demon, they were on the first floor. If they were any higher, the demon would be even more screwed than he was to begin with. Dean glared at the demon who smirked. The demon had to do a double take on Dean. At that moment, Dean knew the other demons would know what he was.

"What the hell are you doing with a Winchester?" the demon spat out at him.

Dean smirked, and in a blink of an eye he was in front of the demon holding him by the neck. "That Winchester that you threw out the window," Dean clutched tighter making the demon claw at him, "was my brother."

The demon's eyes widened. He had just realized that not only did Sam Winchester had a brother, but said brother was a fucking Knight of Hell! He clawed at the knight to let him go. His eyes flashed back using whatever powers he had to get out of the knight's grip, but it was to no avail.

Dean smiled a creepy smile, "Don't think after hurting what's mine, I'm going to let you go." Dean pulled out the First Blade, and showed it to the demon before thrusting it in its stomach. He watched as the demon's being flickered orange before collapsing to the floor dead.

He turned around about to go to Sam, when he froze in his tracks at the sight of Sam staring back at him through the window he was thrown out of.

"Dean-" Sam closed his mouth not knowing what to say to what he just saw.

Dean held out his hands in a calming gesture. "Sammy, I can explain."

Sam's shock turned to anger. He turned his back on Dean obviously going to the car. Dean cursed under his breath. He ran to the window and jumped out. He called for Sam, but his brother wouldn't look at him. He didn't want to have to use his powers that came with being a Knight of Hell. He knew he was in deep shit as it was.

"Sam, please!" Dean caught up with Sam and got in front of him. "Please, hear me out."

Sam stopped. He crossed his arms waiting. "Then tell me Dean. What can you say to me that could explain to me what the fuck I just saw? What can you say that could explain how you went from one spot to another in a blink of a fucking eye?" Sam shoved him. "What can you say that could explain to me that you're not human, and you made no effort to tell me!"

Dean's heart picked up speed as he listened to his brother's words. He didn't bother with being shoved; it was less than he deserved. He couldn't deny that he heard betrayal and hurt in his brother's voice.

"Okay, just promise me you'll hear me out with no interruptions?"

Sam stayed silent. Dean sighed. This wasn't how he wanted Sam to find out about him. He felt drained. He knew he shouldn't be feeling this, but he couldn't explain it. When he was around Sam, he just felt human. He could forget what he really was. Sam deserved to know the truth, and if he left him then Dean deserved it.

He took a deep breath, and launched himself in the tale of his life that Sam had no knowledge of. He couldn't make eye contact with Sam through the whole thing. He couldn't bear to see disgust on Sam's face.

When he was done, he still couldn't look at Sam.

"You're a demon, and you didn't bother telling me?!" Sam yelled. He stepped away from Dean which hurt him deeply. "All this time that you've been with us, you didn't say a word. You know what? I could forgive the fact that you're a demon. Come on, I'm married to an angel. I slept with a demon and had fallen in love with a werewolf at one point. You being a demon isn't the biggest issue here."

Dean furrowed his brows at that. He had told himself that if they could get passed this, then he was going to ask Sam about that.

"I could even get passed what you did to me in Hell. What hurts the most is the fact that you lied to me." Sam's voice was full of tears at that last part. It didn't seem like a big deal, but the lying was what hurt the most in Sam's book. "This whole time, I've been completely honest with you about everything. Yet, this, you kept from me."

Dean opened his mouth, but Sam cut him off. "I don't want to hear anything more now. You told me everything, at least I hope you did, but right now I need to think." He turned slightly away from Dean, and called out for Castiel.

Castiel holding Deanna was wide awake and grumpy. "Sam, what-" He broke off when he first spotted Dean. His eyes narrowed taking him in for what he was. "What the hell?"

Sam put a hand on his shoulder, "I'll tell you later." He looked back to Dean, "Take the car."

Dean's eyes widened at that. He shook his head slowly, _No! Sam wasn't leaving him. He couldn't._ "Sam, please don't-"

"I'm not leaving you, but I'm going to go ahead with Cas. I need to think for awhile. Your drive back would be plenty of time."

Before Dean could open his mouth, Sam, Castiel and Deanna were gone. He fell to his knees, and let out a broken scream. His eyes went to black, and he screamed and cursed like it was nothing.

Which was where he found himself now. He was in the Impala heading back to the motel. Dean couldn't believe that he lost his brother. It didn't matter that Sam said he needed time, the point was, Sam was gone!

* * *

Dean makes it back to the motel, but doesn't get out. He just sits there, and stares at the room his brother was in. His heart was beating rapidly. Just because he was a demon, didn't mean that his brother couldn't make him nervous. His existence revolved around that man. Without him to keep him grounded, he knew that he was just going to succumb to what a Knight of Hell really was.

As Dean was making his way to the room, he stopped. He took a deep breath, and just as he was about to knock, the door flew open. It was Sam, and he was standing there watching him carefully.

"Can I come in?"

Sam stepped aside, but Dean stopped in his tracks when he came up to the salt line. He couldn't get passed. This only reminded him of why he had to drive back alone.

Sam watched as his brother stopped, and was going to ask what was wrong when he looked down. He frowned when he saw what stopped Dean. He huffed. He broke the salt line and when Dean finally went in, he closed the door and redid the line.

"Where's Deanna and Feathers?" Dean asked looking around.

Sam had a hint of a smile. "I asked Castiel if he could leave for an hour while we talk. Obviously, he took Deanna with him."

"Oh, okay." Dean felt out of place in the room with his brother. "So have you had time to think?"

Sam crossed his arms not saying anything for a few minutes. Then, "Yeah. I talked to Cas, and he explained everything he knew about the Mark and what comes with it. It's a heavy burden to take on alone."

Dean nodded. "I know, but I had to. I had to look out for you. That's my job! Keeping you safe is what I'm supposed to do, and I would do whatever it took to make sure that I could do that."

Sam nodded his understanding. "I know. Thank you for what you did for us. I know it must have been hard to leave me knowing what could've been if you stayed. Thank you for sacrificing so much so Castiel and I could be together. I really don't know what I would do if Castiel wasn't in my life. I understand why you did what you did, I do, but the thing is I don't want you to take on these burdens by yourself."

Dean watched in confusion as Sam held out his arm for him to take. Sam just stood there waiting for Dean to understand. Dean's eyes widened when he finally did. He stepped away shaking his head.

"No, Sam."

"There's nothing I wouldn't do for you," Sam said calmly. He even smiled at Dean like this wasn't anything out of the ordinary.

"Please, Sam, you don't know what you're asking. I can't do this to you."

"Dean, do you trust me?"

"With my life," Dean said with no hesitation. And it was true. No matter what they were, no matter how it was supposed to be with what he was, Dean would more than willing to put his life in Sam's hands. As far as Dean was concerned, he was human as long as Sam, Deanna and even Castiel was around to keep him grounded.

"Then take my hand."

Dean hesitated but went to Sam. He took Sam's arm, and with fear in his eyes, he did what Sam wanted. The Mark on his arm began to glow, and he watched as it began to travel to Sam's arm. Sam hissed in pain, but didn't let go. They both watched in awe as the Mark appeared on Sam's arm.

When it was over, Dean let go and went to check him over. "Are you okay?" Sam nodded. "I hope you know what you just got yourself into, because there's no going back. We now share it."

Sam called out for Castiel, and they explained everything that had happened. Castiel was of course angry, but he came to accept it. Sam took Deanna and handed her to Dean. He laughed at the change on Dean's face when he held her. Leave it to a baby to be able to tame a Knight of Hell.

That night, the adults began to talk about what they were going to do. Although, it was Dean's job to keep Sam safe, he couldn't deny that he was a little happy now that he wouldn't have to deal with the burdens that came with the Mark on his own. Now that they shared the Mark, Sam and Dean were that much closer.

Before it was time for them to go to bed, Dean handed Sam the First Blade. Sam stared at him in obvious confusion. Dean waited for Sam to get his thoughts straightened out.

"Why are you giving this to me?" Sam went to hand it back, but Dean refused to take it. "Don't you think you're going to need it more than me?"

Castiel watched them both, and he couldn't help but feel confused as well. He sat next to Sam, "What's going on Dean?"

Dean smirked at their faces, and reached under his pillow and pulled out his own weapon. Sam and Castiel gasped. Dean waved it at them, "We do share the Mark after all." Dean sat there waving his own First Blade at them. Since they have their own Mark, it only makes sense they have their own Blade. Dean chuckled.

* * *

Garcia was told to come along for this particular case. She didn't understand why, since she could easily be used in Washington. She wasn't too worried about it, because she liked tagging along.

While they were all there going over their findings, the lights went out. They looked around and saw that the entire station's power was out. Even though it was the middle of the day, the station was pitch black. Each member took out there phones and shined their lights around. "What the hell's going on?" said Rossi.

"You know, it's really pointless when people ask stupid questions, don't you think Sammy?"

Six phones shined their lights to the entrance of the room. They could see Dean Winchester leaning against the door frame like it was the most casual thing to do. He was wearing a red plaid shirt and blue jeans. He looked nothing like the Dean they knew. He seemed more rugged and experienced. Experienced in what? They couldn't say.

"Dean?" said Hotch trying to get a better look.

"Well, it wasn't that stupid." Sam Winchester said next to him.

"Sam. How the hell did you get in here? Come to turn yourself in?" Rossi asked shining the flashlight on his phone at them.

Sam chuckled, "Okay, _that_ was stupid."

"Must we talk?" asked Castiel out of nowhere standing in between them.

The team stepped back in shock. "Where the hell did you come from?"

Castiel glared at them. "Your human minds wouldn't be able to understand where I came from, so don't bother."

"Feathers, you're no fun." Dean sighed dramatically. "Anyway, I only came here to ask you all something."

"There's no point in asking anything, Dean. You're all under arrest," Emily stated.

Dean shook his head, "No, I don't think so. Either I ask my question then get to the fun part and you all live that much longer, or we go straight to the fun part. Either way I'm perfectly fine with your whatever you choose."

Five guns were drawn and pointed at them, but neither the brothers nor Castiel made no move or shown any fear at the guns pointed at them.

"Maybe turning the lights out wasn't a good idea," Dean said calmly.

Sam shrugged his shoulders. "Well, it got their attention which was what we were going for." He looked to Castiel, "Cas turn on the lights."

Before any of the team members could say anything, the lights went back on. They moved over slightly to look for any other FBI member, but he couldn't see anyone else.

"Anyway, back to my question." Dean smirked at them all, "Which one of you wanted my brother and Castiel to go to prison for what they did?" He was met with silence. "Once I know who were the ones that did, I'll let the others go."

No one spoke. Dean looked between each of them, and he was happy to see the fear in their eyes.

"So much for only monsters," spat out Hotch.

"Actually, in my book and in Castiel's, those who set out to harm Sam in any way _are_ monsters. Only thing we can truly agree on right now. I think we're making progess. I mean, come on. You didn't think we were actually going to let this go, did you? You all wanted to put him away and that would've hurt him more than you would all know," clarified Dean. "I mean, it's not like we wouldn't have gotten him out, but that's not the point."

"Can we get on with this?" Castiel demanded with annoyance. "I would really much like to go hunt that wendigo a few states over. At least with that there'll be more action."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Fine. Who- Oh! Sweetheart, don't you think it's time for you to come over here? You don't have to be over there anymore."

The team looked at each other baffled. Who the hell was he talking to? That's when a certain blonde walked away from them while the others could only stare in shock.

"JJ, what are you doing?" Emily asked dumbfounded.

Jennifer shrugged and pointed her gun at her former friends, "What's it look like?"

Dean wrapped an arm around Jennifer and pulled her in close. "Jen over here has come to the dark side. Anyway, we really need to be going, so..." he trailed off.

Just the lights went out once again, each member saw just in time two sets of black eyes and one blue. Anyone nearby would see nothing, but they would most definitely hear screaming and many gunshots. By the time the police officers showed up, they only find four dead bodies.

* * *

 _ **Epilogue:**_

Dean had come to love his life with his family. Now that he and Jennifer were together, he could finally know some of the happiness that he sees between Sam and Castiel. Regardless if normal demons of any kind didn't care about human emotions or wants, Dean has come to realize that if you're a Winchester, 'normal' will never apply to you.

Then again, both he and Sam will be more than willing to show how much of a demon they can be if the need arises. In fact, the need has come here and there since they joined up. Basically, mess with any of Sam and Dean's family, you'll know firsthand what it means to piss of a Knight of Hell.

Jennifer had come to enjoy her time with Dean and the others. She loved watching Deanna when they had to go on a hunt. Dean had even taken her on a few. She would have to build up to the more challenging cases, but she was more than happy to babysit Deanna. Dean being a demon made no difference to her, because she fell in love with who Dean was. And she'll love who and what he is, and who he'll become. Who said love was strictly for humans?

She was happy that Garica came with her since there was no longer a BAU at the moment. Dean had told her about the hacker that she had come across and at the first mention of him, Garcia was on board with seeing him. Ash was perfectly fine with Garcia coming to stay with him. Both Garcia and Ash had come to agree that they would help them in anyway they could. Sam was an excellent hacker, but he was honestly fine with admitting that Ash and Garcia were much better than him.

Sam watched as Dean and Jennifer had taken Deanna to the diner. His brother could tell that he wanted some alone time with Castiel. It was more than just wanting to be alone with Castiel... Sam had major news for him, and he wanted Castiel to be the first to know.

As Sam lay there next to Castiel after making love, Sam's heart beat erratically. He was so nervous about this. A part of didn't want this, because of what it would mean. Another part was scared that Castiel wasn't in love with him like he was before he took on the Mark. Despite Castiel being okay with why he did it, Sam still felt that he didn't love him like before. A major part of Sam was scared that Castiel was only still with him because of Deanna. Sam would take whatever Castiel was willing to give him, but it just wouldn't be the same.

"I could hear you thinking," Castiel said pulling him in closer.

Sam smiled softly. "Do you still love me?"

Castiel furrowed his brows and pulled away from him. "Of course I do. Why in the world would you ask that?"

"Ever since I took on a share of the Mark, I just felt that you don't love me like you used to when I was human."

Castiel sighed and sat up. He stared down at him, "Sam, I love you more than anything in this whole world. I loved you when you were chosen to be the leader of a demon army. I loved you when you had to kill Madison who you loved. I loved you even when we fought. I loved you even before you were born. I loved you even before I knew what love was. I loved you when I saw that my wings were scorched black from saving you. I would've loved you if you had become a demon from your time in Hell." Castiel leaned down and hovered over Sam's face. He could see the unshed tears in his eyes.

"You're right. I don't love you like I used to. It's impossible."

Sam's bottom lip quivered. He felt his heart breaking at Castiel's last words. He knew it. Castiel didn't love him anymore. He didn't know what he was going to do. What was he going to do without Castiel? He was nothing without him. He lifted his hands to cover his face, but Castiel stopped him.

"It's impossible to love you like I used to, because the more I'm with you the more my love grows for you." Castiel wiped a few tears that fell from Sam's eyes. This was one of the things he didn't like about Sam. He always jumped to conclusions before he let him finish.

"It's impossible to love you the same way when the more I'm with you, the more reasons I see to love you all that much more. I love you more than I did when I first saw you." Castiel kissed the tears away. "I love you more than I did when I saved you from Hell." Another kiss. "I love you more than I did when I married you. More than I did when Deanna was born. More than I did when you shared the Mark."

Sam pulled Castiel in closer. "I love you Castiel. I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life. I would be so lost without you. It doesn't matter what I am, my love for you will never go away. I took on the Mark because I wanted to relieve some of the burdens that Dean had to carry, but I did it because now we can always be together." Sam pulled Castiel in for a passionate kiss. He whispered against Castiel's lips, "There ain't no me if there ain't no you."

Castiel could feel the love Sam had for him, and it didn't matter whether they were a demon and an angel. They were meant for each other just as much as Sam and Dean were meant to always stay together.

"I have something to tell you, Cas."

Castiel pulled back looking him in the eyes. He could see that whatever it was that Sam needed to tell was scaring him. He didn't like that, and he hoped that whatever it was wouldn't get in between them or hurt their relationship.

"I'm pregnant."

And that would most certainly be strange to hear coming from anyone other than Sam. Since it was Sam, Castiel pulled Sam into a loving embrace. He was so happy that their family was expanding. He didn't think his father would let Sam get pregnant more than once, but he wasn't going to argue. In the next couple of months, Dean and Jennifer would be pregnant as well. The Winchester name was never meant to die with Sam and Dean.

Castiel spooned Sam and kissed him repeatedly. He was very happy, but then he groaned.

"What?" asked Sam.

"Does this mean you'll be having those disgusting cravings again?" Castiel asked with a hint of a smile.

Sam laughed. "Don't worry, I'll try not to crave anything too outrageous."

Castiel pulled him in closer if it were possible. He whispered in Sam's ear, "I love you, Sam." He kissed and sucked Sam's neck very seductively.

Sam closed his eyes and moaned at the feel of Castiel's mouth on his. He didn't think he was up to another round, but now... he's not so sure. "For how long?"

Castiel could tell that Sam was getting in the mood. He got up to get in between Sam's legs, and pinned his arms forcefully to the sides of his head. Castiel growled and went to kiss his neck just the way Sam liked it. He bit a little too hard which he knew would cause Sam's eyes to turn black. He loved Sam's human eye color, but he found it very sexy when Sam's eyes went black.

"Until the world stops spinning."

After that... words were no longer needed.

 _ **The End.**_

* * *

 **AN: I want to thank everyone who has read and reviewed. I appreciate it greatly. I know that this story was confusing at times, but I truly hope now you all understand. If you don't, you can leave a review or PM and I'll explain it to you. Even I got confused when I wrote the last two chapters. In the end, I really hope you all enjoyed the story. Now that I've written a xover, I'll be writing them a lot more. Anyway, thank you all again. Until next time. -Kauri510**


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